Posted on 08/12/2012 8:46:27 AM PDT by Lazamataz
CNN reported that Mitt Romney gave a 'barn burner' of a speech in Wisconsin today. Democrats were quick to react.
At the White House Press Briefing later today, Jay Carney asked, "Do we want an accused arsonist as the next President? The White House absolutely condemns Mitt Romney for burning a barn."
PETA issued a statement: "It is cruel enough that animals are enslaved and confined to barns, but now we have a candidate who would burn them to death. Barns are sacred temples for the finest living creatures on Earth. Mitt Romney wants to immolate them, sadistically."
Bob Beckel, on Face The Nation, said, "Now we have a Republican running for the Presidential position who clearly hates farmers. The loss of a barn would devastate most farmers. We must stand against this!"
Attorney General Eric Holder promised immediate investigation into Mitt Romney for his alleged arson. "If this occured on Federal land, you can be assured we will quickly act to prosecute Mr. Romney," he said.
Debbie Wasserman Shultz remarked, in a fundraising letter, "Republicans want to burn down America. It's obvious, when Mitt Romney burns down a barn, that this is a symbol of what he wants to do to the middle class."
Mitt Romney's spokesperson, Kevin Madden, responded to the charges, "Are you guys all on crack? What the f*** is wrong with you people???!?"
He did not deny the charges in this statement, and investigation is ongoing.
But hey, I try occasionally anyways.
LOL that made me chuckle....
Somewhere, some sick, twisted, wretched liberal soul bought this as the honest truth. Why don’t you go over to DU and stir the pot a bit? It’s always fun to watch liberals melt down at the most asinine things.
Due to the extreme level of bias exhibited by the so-called 'mainstream' media, I think this should be the standard Republican answer to absolutely any press question. ;)
Some, hell.
I actually fear I gave establishment Democrats a new attack.
Pretty darn good, Laz.
</smile>
Tanks!
Hehehe. That would SO be an awesome!
I have this sinking feeling that you may be right.
Ah yes, Mitt ‘s just a ‘hunka hunka burnin’ love’ don’tchaknow!
Off subject... but here's my SATIRICAL look at the Biden/Ryan debates.
I know you’re aiming for satire, but it was far too realistic, especially the Wasserman-Schultz qoute.
;-)
Recall that when Glenn Beck used the last two verses of “Gods of the Copybook Headings” in his ad for “The Overton Window”, his detractors responded “Dog? Vomit? Sow? Mire? What is this crap?” until they found out it that was actually written by the first English-language author to be awarded the Nobel Prize in Literature.
“What’s all this fuss I keep hearing about violins on television?”
I hear that, in sympathy with the poor barn rabbits, the Occupoopers set their “hare” on fire and preceded to go at it in the road like homosexual rabbits. :)
I have it on good authority from several unnamed sources that Harry Reid is deeply involved in this.
There’s that (in this case) LARGE boulder of truth in your lovely satiric piece where the humor resides. Excellent mocking of the Demwit operatives and compliant mainly slime media, my friend.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.