FReeper Canteen ~ Election Break! If I Were President, I Would....? ~ 02 NOV 2004

FRiends Of The Canteen

[MoJo2001]

 

 

 

 

 

Today's Topic: If I Were President, I Would.....?

With the election going on today, we decided to make each of you "President" for a day. Now that you are ruling the country--what would you do? Would you give everyone Friday's off? Would you get rid of the income tax? What would you do?

 

~ President (Insert Your Name) ~


Scenario

Before you sit down and do this, please GO VOTE!

America needs you. You have been made President for a day because the current one is going fishing on the new Mars settlement.

If I Were President, I Would......

Ban Taxes?
Remove The Speed Limit?
Repeal the Beer Tax? (Have to get a plug in for Burkaman 4 President!)

What would you do?

We want to know!!

 

Now it's your turn to share. What would you do as President?

 

 

 

[NeoCaveman]

I'd hire Rush Limbaugh as my press secretary and have him give briefings to the press from noon to 3 every week day.

[Kathy in Alaska]

Thank you, ms feather, for the Canteen Blessing for the Troops.

[MoJo2001]

Very cool.

I'm praying for it.

I'm so nervous about it.

I need chocolate.

It's my band aid when I'm not feeling well. LOL!

[Viet-Boat-Rider]

If I were President, I would:

1) Eliminate the Federal Department of Education, make the Teachers Union illegal, distribute the Federal Educational money to the local schools and require vouchers for all students that desire to go to a private school.

2) Dec lair Martial Law and fire the Congress and the Senate, then get a phone book from each District, open each phone book to a random page and point to a name and make that person a Congressman or Senator (give the Peoples House back to the People).

3)Shut down the Mexican boarder, sweep through America and deport all illegals (they can all wait in line like everybody else).

4) Eliminate Government funding to NPR.

5)Prosecute those in the mainstream media that have violated America's trust, and then suspend their license. Give the airwaves back to the American people.

And this is just my FIRST DAY IN OFFICE! Guess what I would do to the college professors, etc.

[Kirkwood]

If I were president...
I would hire Kerry and Tehrayza to be my maid and butler (respectively - heheh).

[Mudboy Slim]

And I'd make you some very nice rhymes...MUD

[usmcobra]

If I were president I would....

Make it law that for every lie used in a campaign the teller loses ten votes to his opponent for every person that heard or saw the lie.

and for every lie spread by outside sources aka 527's Like Moveon.org there would be a fine of 1 million dollars.

[stylin19a]

With approx. 25% of oil products being used on engines, motors,manufacturing and farm equipment, I would mandate that all oil used for these purposes would be 100% synthetic.

I would dismantle the "Universal Service" dept. of the FCC.
(those goofy fed charges that are a percentage of your bill on all your phone bills - think about all the phone service you have - local/long distance/cell etc - those monthly fees must run into the gazillions each month...).
Any money in the fund at the time of dismantling is to be used to purchase oil for the Strategic Oil Reserves.

I would authorize campaign finance reform to include:
- Free air time (during certain times of the day only)
- A candidate can spend no more than the yearly salary
of the position that they are running for times the
length of the term.
- Stop all matching funds.


How would all this be done ? The Paul Begala method of law enactment...."Stroke of the pen, new law...kewl"

[Seaplaner]

If I were President I would...

Yield most important decisions to Vice President Ann Coulter.

[MeekOneGOP]

Mornin', everybody ! Happy Election Day!!

Today President Bush gets re-elected! :^D

Go, Dubya, go !!

Have a cup while you Freep !

For those who prefer hot chocolate.....

[Kathy in Alaska]

Welcome to the Canteen, Dolphy. I like your presidential wisdom.

[Mother Mary]

"Resistance to tyranny is obedience to God." - Thomas Jefferson. [Love your tagline]

If I was President I would:
1. Reaffirm that abortion is murder and make it illegal
2. Get the USA out of the UN and the UN out of the USA
3. Start impeaching activist judges
4. Abolish the income tax and the IRS
5. Ban socialism and communism and other anti-Americanisms
6. End 90% of foreign aid
7. Make it illegal to supress JudeoChristian symbols
8. Get the government out of Healthcare and Education
9. Cap the number of lawyers permitted in each state
10. Make 'God Bless America' the national anthem

[Radix]

 

Dixville Notch tally:

 

Kerry  15

Bush  15

Unbelievable!

 

Dixville Notch, NH is the site of the first voting in the primary elections for the USA. The voters gather at the stroke of midnight to cast their ballots to the click and whir of news cameras from around the world. There is excellent hiking, fishing, golfing, and skiing in the area, and a resort hotel.

http://www.greatnorthwoods.org/dixvillenotch/

 

[Mudboy Slim]

Seriously, if I were POTUS, I'd propose an amendment wherein the only legitimate voters were those who were NET-taxpayers...and all those who sucked more off the Federal teet than they paid in taxes would be precluded from voting!!

Just like stockholders...if you ain't a producer, yer a leech...MUD

[Kathy in Alaska]

Thanks, Khepri, for stopping by.

[Smartass]

THANKS FOR THE PING

[MoJo2001]

I'm going to need a factory of chocolates to survive this Election. I just want it to end.

[ONETWOONE]

Bush should take a sword and make a line in the sand. He should plant to old glory on his side and the axis of evil and the UN flag on the other side. I would say anthing, but I would have a split screen with all good and glory on one side and the other side being dark and mysterious.

[Smartass]

[Kathy in Alaska]

Welcome to the Canteen, crushlits. I like your ideas. No one would miss SeeBS or the NYT.