Kerry: Bush Lied About Water on Mars

ScrappleFace ^

[Sub-Driver]

Kerry: Bush Lied About Water on Mars (2004-03-03) -- John Forbes Kerry, the presumptive Democrat presidential nominee, today said President George Bush lied about the presence of water on Mars.

The charge comes a day after NASA announced that its Mars rovers had found evidence that there may have been water on Mars in the past.

"Evidence of previous water is not the same as the presence of actual water now," said Mr. Kerry. "No one doubts that Mars once had a 'water program', if you will. But Mr. Bush spent $800 million on his unilateral Martian adventure. That money could have provided affordable health care for poor children of minimum-wage-earning same-sex domestic partners who were wounded by assault weapons on underfunded public school playgrounds."

Mr. Kerry added that when he supported increased funding for NASA, he didn't know that "Bush would...uh...foul it up as badly as he did."

[dfwgator]

The good news for Senator Kerry is that the Rover discovered that apparently Mars has an unlimited supply of Botox.

[Sofa King]

Parody is getting harder and harder to distinguish from the real thing...

[EggsAckley]

That's because the "real thing" is getting weirder and weirder.

[CheezyD]

Ain't it the truth.

[PaulaB]

"Evidence of previous water is not the same as the presence of actual water now," said Mr. Kerry



Say what????? If this country actually votes this guy in...I may pull a Hollywood and start trying to move elsewhere...LOL Does it get any weirder than Kerry?

[mict42]

My thought, exactly. Ain't it sad?

[Paradox]

Its a joke Paula, but whats sad is that its not too far removed from reality...

[Ben Hecks]

LOL! Hope Rush sees this.

[FourtySeven]

LOL! Hope Rush sees this.

Good idea! Bump for Rush!

[sanjacjake]

GWB..Ought to come out now and say:

IF KERRY STOPS TELLING LIES ABOUT ME, I WILL STOP
TELLING THE TRUTH ABOUT HIM.

....oR SOMETHING SIMILAR. JAKE

[PaulaB]

*LOL* I got it thus the comment about Hollywood....does anyone posting here really see that Kerry is a quack or is it just me???? I heard Rush say yesterday that America can see that Kerry doesn't have a stand on anything or something to that effect...I hope thats true...I worry about senior citizens and the young punk crowd though.

[Paradox]

Oh, ok, I wasnt sure if ya got it, like I said, its almost believable.

I worry about senior citizens and the young punk crowd though.

I worry about stupid people, or people who are so self-centered that one small issue can decide things for them.

[Dalan]

The only thing missing from this that distinguishes it from real Loony Left rants is the obligatory accusation that Bush launched his illegal robotic occupation of Mars in order to benefit Halliburton and his other moneyed special interest campaign contributors.

[Jaysun]

This is way too believable. Someone must have hacked our thin-headed opponents computer!

[Sub-Driver]

shhhhh. don't let anyone know but there's OIL on MARS!

[pfflier]

As stupid as this sounds, this is the demoncratic theme. Every thing they say will start out with "President Bush lied about..."