[billbears]

Didn't see this posted. Forgive me in advance if it's a double post. Just found the whole scenario interesting

[HamiltonJay]

Sad, but hardly a suprising outcome.

[Tax-chick]

An unfortunate situation all around. I wonder whether the 9/11 payouts had anything to do with making a widow with 4 children more appealing than one's original wife and 4 children.

[Wolfie]

Interesting that she expects lawmakers to fix it. And completely predictable.

[krb]

I wonder how much the big cash payout we gave those widows is helping these guys decide to ditch their families and go join new ones.

[Alberta's Child]

"The department saw this happening - knew from mental-health experts that it could happen - and did nothing to intervene," Mary Koenig said.

In this modern "anything goes" society of ours, how can anyone possibly expect a government department to pass judgement on what these men are doing? If the FDNY had "intervened" in any way, they'd be accused of imposing their morality on people.

[boxerblues]

The Florence Nightingale syndrome. Falling in love with the one who takes care of you

[Lunatic Fringe]

"The department saw this happening - knew from mental-health experts that it could happen - and did nothing to intervene," Mary Koenig said.

And what exactly did she expect the FDNY to do? Forbid a firefighter from dating someone? As tasteless as it might be for a married firefighter to leave his wife for a widow in mourning, what goes on in the personal lives of city employees is no business of city departments...

[Servant of the 9]

There is only one way to console a widow.

So9

[lelio]

I give this 30 posts before someone calls the firefighters that left their families Democrats. The post about the CEO of Boeing resigning turned immediately to Tom Daschle's wife being involved.

[Lizavetta]

I didn't leave my family. I left my wife."

Jeez, is this guy a Clinton or what?

Hey buddy, if you and your wife life in different houses and your kids are now visiting you instead of living with you, you've left your family.

[Cate]

What the article doesn't address is how many families broke up before 9/11 and the spouses involved became involved with other members of the FDNY. The numbers are probably close to the number of families after 9/11. Situations like this have been going on for years in fire fighter, military and law enforcement families. Its unfortunate, but true that the grass seems greener on the other side of the fence.

[Arthur McGowan]

There is nothing surprising about this at all. It's good old-fashioned "transference." Take one man, one woman, put them into a situation charged with intense emotion (loss of buddy, loss of husband), with lots of dialogue about the intense emotion, and lots of helpful behavior, and pretty soon they will be "in love." It's time to tear up that "unwritten contract," and let emotionally neutral professionals help the widows.

[Neets]

Koenig said that when her husband began to disassociate himself from his family, she made repeated entreaties to his captain to intervene. After speaking with both Madeline Bergin and Gerry Koenig, the captain ordered Gerry back to his own family.

But the order didn't stick.

By what authority did she think the Captain could "order" him back to his own family?

By what authority did she think ANYONE could "order" him back?

[stuartcr]

Since those guys are heros, the state should let them have more than one wife.

[CaptainK]

Why did these women allow their husbands to go alone to comfort the widows?. I would have tagged along, kids in tow, for every bereavement session.

[Doohickey]

"The department saw this happening - knew from mental-health experts that it could happen - and did nothing to intervene," Mary Koenig said.

Well good, because it's none of their damn business. This'll be an interesting topic.

[StolarStorm]

Perhaps this is a result of affairs already underway BEFORE 9/11.