[Arthur McGowan]

There is nothing surprising about this at all. It's good old-fashioned "transference." Take one man, one woman, put them into a situation charged with intense emotion (loss of buddy, loss of husband), with lots of dialogue about the intense emotion, and lots of helpful behavior, and pretty soon they will be "in love." It's time to tear up that "unwritten contract," and let emotionally neutral professionals help the widows.

[eastforker]

Man I am surprised I am the first one with the following scenario.It is very possible there was an affair going on before 911. Think about it,most FD personnel are quite close,different work schedules at times ,family outings etc.Don't say it ain't so cuz it happens more often than you think,same with LE's.

[Aliska]

You make an excellent point. In early Christianity, it appears the men (church leaders) took care of the widows. People of spiritual maturity can deal with these things. We haven't prepared ourselves spiritually for this sort of thing.

I blame the widows, in part, too. What woman of any conscience can steal another woman's husband? I came close to doing it myself. The men were no help, of course, rationalizing everything.

The biggest thing I see in all these modern temptations is that people don't use their minds and look down the road and see where acting on certain temptations will lead. We seek the pleasure of the moment and the hell with everybody else.

The irony is that the grieving widow is comforted, at least temporarily, and the spurned spouse is filled with grief which is almost a worse form of grief than losing one's spouse to death.

[lonevoice]

I appreciate the sanity of your post. The replies on this thread aren't half as disturbing as the replies the duplicate of this thread is getting. Very disappointing, but serves as a useful reminder that political conservatism doesn't necessarily include morality or common sense.

I agree with you on all points. The situational transference was entirely foreseeable and the "unwritten contract" needs a major overhaul. In that, I can only agree with the fireman's ex-wife who said, "It's too late for my family, but they can damn sure fix it for next time."