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Funeral Rights (Originally published by National Catholic Register)
Catholics United for the Faith ^ | June 8-14, 2003 | Leon J. Suprenant, Jr.

Posted on 06/20/2003 8:02:36 PM PDT by Salvation

Funeral Rights
by Leon J. Suprenant, Jr.

Originally published by National Catholic Register, June 8-14, 2003


One of the pivotal virtues for Christian living is hope, by which we trust that God in His infinite mercy will one day welcome us into His eternal Kingdom. We realize we’re not there yet, and that we need to persevere to the end.

One of the sins against hope is presumption (Catechism, no. 2092), which takes many forms. One form of presumption, commonly witnessed at funerals, is the attitude that in the end God will forgive us irrespective of our cooperation with grace. According to this mindset, heaven is the inevitable and more or less universal sequel to this life.

As many of us know, the prevailing view at funerals today is that the deceased is “in a better place.” It comes as no surprise, then, that funerals increasingly have become in practice “mini-canonization” services.

Against this backdrop, many are startled to learn that the Catholic Church actually forbids eulogies at funerals (General Instruction of the Roman Missal, no. 382; Order of Christian Funerals, no. 27). Rather, the homily at the funeral Mass, which must be given by a bishop, priest, or deacon, should “illumine the mystery of Christian death in the light of the risen Christ” (Catechism, no. 1688).

“As bearers of the tenderness of the Church and the comfort of the faith,” priests are called to “console those who believe without offending those who grieve” (Order of Christian Funerals, no. 17). Balancing this vital pastoral task with the prohibition of eulogies has become increasingly difficult.

Grieving Catholics often consider it something of a “right” to be able to eulogize deceased loved ones at length during the funeral Mass. In recent months, Archbishop John J. Myers of Newark and Bishop Frederick Henry of Calgary have issued decrees that prohibit even “brief remembrances” of the deceased during funeral Masses.

Here some clarification is in order. First, the funeral rites have three discernible phases: (1) the vigil (or “wake”), which marks the time between death and the funeral liturgy; (2) the funeral liturgy itself, which may or may not include a Mass; and (3) the Rite of Committal, which typically takes place at the graveside.

While the Church has preserved the integrity of the homily at the funeral Mass, the rite does provide for a “remembrance of the deceased before the final commendation” by a family member or friend. The “remembrance” is not supposed to replace the homily nor should it cross the line and become a eulogy, which is an address in praise of the deceased.

The remembrance is a legitimate part of the funeral rites and it can provide an appropriate outlet for the expression of the mourning experienced by those who survive the deceased. Yet, remembrances can be unpredictable and difficult to control in the context of a sacred Church liturgy. For that reason, Archbishop Myers and Bishop Henry have restricted the remembrance to the vigil or the graveside service.

Why is this important? Because the Christian funeral is not a celebration of the life of the deceased person, but a celebration of the saving mystery of Christ’s death and resurrection. After all, the merits of Christ’s sacrifice, made present and effective at Mass, are ultimately the basis of our hope and comfort when confronted with a loved one’s death.

Further, we must break through the presumption that the deceased is already in heaven. Instead, we need to pray and offer sacrifice for the deceased, which Scripture describes as a “very excellent and noble” practice (cf. 2 Mac. 12:43; Catechism, no. 1032). What better way to do this than by offering the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass?

When we lose sight of the fundamentally paschal character of funeral Masses, we not only fail to pray for the dead, but we also miss a teachable moment for all of us. The reality of death affords all of us the opportunity to reflect upon our own mortality and thus seek to restore right relationship with God. An objective observer at many funerals today could easily conclude that it doesn’t really matter how one lives, because everyone’s eternal fate seems to be the same.

Part of the grieving process involves our being able to share with others our memories of our dear departed loved ones. Spending time with those who have recently suffered such a loss is indeed a praiseworthy act of mercy. But there’s a time and place for everything.

An analogous situation might be that of a marriage. There are many “moments” that are rightly part of the celebration, but nonetheless it’s proper to keep matters more appropriate to a rehearsal dinner, wedding shower, or reception out of the sacred marriage liturgy. The same applies to funerals.

I often think of a dear friend who died over a year ago. He had a tremendous sense of humor but, particularly as his terminal illness progressed, he always got very serious when talking about his impending death. Even though he was a daily communicant for decades and devoted his “retirement” to service of the Church, he pleaded with me to not assume “he made it” after he died, but rather to offer prayers, alms, and works of penance on his behalf. His approach may seem extreme or scrupulous to some, but in reality it was a magnificent display of hope—in God, not our own efforts.

Leon J. Suprenant, Jr. is the president of Catholics United for the Faith (CUF) and publisher of Lay Witness magazine. For answers to liturgical questions, call CUF toll-free at 1-800-MY-FAITH.


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KEYWORDS: catholicbeliefs; catholiclist; death; eulogies; faith; funerals; heaven; hope; prayer
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To: ninenot
**Matter of fact, black is perfectly acceptable in the NO, too. Same with the Dies Irae. You can find it in the rubrics...**

This is good to know.
21 posted on 06/21/2003 8:13:44 AM PDT by Salvation (†With God all things are possible.†)
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To: sinkspur
**The question is, can you find any black vestments?**

Find a seamstress or tailor and have them made -- new idea?
22 posted on 06/21/2003 8:14:53 AM PDT by Salvation (†With God all things are possible.†)
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To: sinkspur
That was a mean-spirited comment, Sink.

Here I was, foolishly thinking you might actually not be aware that black vestments WERE available to purchase and donate.

BTW...no need to hire professional mourners -- there are plenty of us around to do the job ourselves.

Regards,
23 posted on 06/21/2003 8:27:20 AM PDT by VermiciousKnid
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To: VermiciousKnid
That was a mean-spirited comment, Sink.

It was, and I apologize. It was a stupid remark.

I'm just very surprised that someone would actually go the lengths of purchasing black vestments so that the priest would wear them at somebody's funeral.

Do you ask that the white pall not be placed on the casket? Is the Mass a Tridentine or Novus Ordo?

24 posted on 06/21/2003 8:38:05 AM PDT by sinkspur
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To: sinkspur
Apology accepted.

My mother's family comes from a decidedly blue-collar area (the coal-mining section of Pennsylvania). There were many parishes there which had literally NOTHING and relied solely on donations from their parishoners. Things are much better today, but our family's tradition lives on.

Sometimes, when things were difficult, the whole family chipped in to purchase (and donate) vestments -- they really aren't that expensive (you can buy a set for about $450), and when you have a large family, the cost gets spread out pretty thin.

The pall is usually white, but with black embroidery on it(and decorating these palls was how I learned to embroider). The Mass is in English, but is almost unrecognizable in its solemnity and language from the Masses I attend here in New York. The Dies Irae is always sung. (I have never heard the Dies Irae sung in New York.)

Regards,
25 posted on 06/21/2003 8:50:25 AM PDT by VermiciousKnid
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To: Loyalist
I was Catholic growing up and went to two distincty different services this year. One for my uncle who had a Rev Bozo kind of guy who kept up a patter and spent lots of time asking for "input." He kept on calling my uncle, a very dignified man, by his family nickname. I was embarrassed.

The other was my father's service which was an old fashioned Catholic high funeral mass. Our only input was that my daughter sang Amazing Grace. Otherwise the entire mass was conducted by a young and conservative priest. It was a delight and honor to be there.
26 posted on 06/21/2003 6:18:20 PM PDT by mlmr (The chickens always come home to roost........unless they are eaten by the racoons.)
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To: mlmr
The vestments were white though. I assumed that was because it was two days after Easter.
27 posted on 06/21/2003 6:20:56 PM PDT by mlmr (The chickens always come home to roost........unless they are eaten by the racoons.)
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To: Loyalist
It was so coincidental to come across this article because a friend and I were talking. She sews for our parish and had just made a white pall for the parish.

Another individual just stood quietly by and didn't say anything. So I emailed this article to her. Her response was so positive. She wants people to remember that she was a sinner; she wants them to pray for her. Wasn't this the origiaal intent?

How did the Catholic teaching go all the way over to the other side, thinking that white was OK?

Anyone have any answers, other than the 60x and disinformation being taught in our churches?
28 posted on 06/21/2003 7:27:52 PM PDT by Salvation (†With God all things are possible.†)
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To: Salvation
60x=60s
29 posted on 06/21/2003 7:30:31 PM PDT by Salvation (†With God all things are possible.†)
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To: Salvation
How did the Catholic teaching go all the way over to the other side, thinking that white was OK?

Anyone have any answers, other than the 60x and disinformation being taught in our churches?

White signifies hope, the Christian hope in the Resurrection.

It's not a matter of teaching, it's a matter of emphasis. Black was always so dark and final.

And the Dies Irae, whose first line was "O Day of Wrath, O Day of Mourning."

Christ conquered death, so let's pray for the soul of the dead. If he died in the grace of Christ, he is with Christ and, as Christians, that is a matter for rejoicing.

30 posted on 06/21/2003 7:39:59 PM PDT by sinkspur
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To: sinkspur
If he died in the grace of Christ

Ahh, that is the point, if. I agree we must continue to pray for the soul of the deceased. But, how many Catholiu funerals have you gone to lately where the priests have told us to pray for the soul?

31 posted on 06/21/2003 11:17:32 PM PDT by It's me
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To: mlmr
I was Catholic growing up and went to two distincty different services this year. One for my uncle who had a Rev Bozo kind of guy...

This is a new one for my dictionary of vernacular. LOL.

32 posted on 06/22/2003 12:16:35 AM PDT by Havisham
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To: Havisham
Haven't you seen any of the ads for the Oxford Review? They have ads about Reverend Bozo and his yahoo guitar and literguical dance... Someday when I have money I am going to subscribe.
33 posted on 06/22/2003 3:06:02 AM PDT by mlmr (The chickens always come home to roost........unless they are eaten by the racoons.)
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To: It's me
But, how many Catholiu funerals have you gone to lately where the priests have told us to pray for the soul?

All of them.

34 posted on 06/22/2003 7:03:55 AM PDT by sinkspur
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To: mlmr
I hadn't heard of Rev. Bozo. I was aware of the clown ministry and liturgical dance fad. Ironically, the local high Episcopal church has 'progressed' toward liturgical dances and Harry Potter events. The latter staged on the exterior balcony of the church, but a pagan right nonetheless. Oh, and I almost forgot the meditation labrynth. St. Michael and All Angels was a hold out for the high Anglican tradition but the parish came into money. The rest is history.
35 posted on 06/22/2003 12:03:33 PM PDT by Havisham
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To: Salvation
Great article... it always bothered me when Catholics presummed that the deceased was in heaven... I did not say anything, but I just prayed for the deceased and the family that was grieving.
36 posted on 06/22/2003 6:36:06 PM PDT by Saint Athanasius (Santorium run for President!)
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To: Saint Athanasius
**I did not say anything, but I just prayed for the deceased and the family that was grieving.**

Well now, you can copy this article off and show it to your friends. (Not at the funeral, of course, but ahead of time so they are educated.)



37 posted on 06/22/2003 8:08:20 PM PDT by Salvation (†With God all things are possible.†)
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