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Martin Luther's Body Exhumed, Found "Rolled Over"
Team Tominthebox News Network® ^ | 31 October, 2007 | Tom Slawson

Posted on 10/31/2007 9:46:17 AM PDT by topcat54

Wittenburg, Germany - In a shocking story that is now making headlines on only the most reputable of news sources, a recent exhumation of the body of Martin Luther showed that the Reformer has indeed "rolled over in is grave." Luther was buried beneath the pulpit of the Castle Church in Wittenburg after his death in 1546. As noted in the records of the burial ceremony, Luther was placed within the tomb laying on his back. When the work crew opened the tomb over the weekend to perform maintenance on it, they found the remains of Luther lying face down, indicating that at some point over the past 450 years something has caused Luther to roll over. Many theories and questions now abound.

"This is, in some ways, both funny and highly disturbing" stated Peter Lundenfestenaker, pastor of Peace Lutheran Church in Green Bay, Wisconsin. "Various people within Lutheranism have joked over the years when this or that new policy was passed that 'Luther must be rolling over in his grave' and low and behold, we find that he has."

Indeed, there have been numerous complaints over the past 200 years that many Protestant churches in general have departed from the Biblical Christianity that was espoused by Luther and the other Reformers.

"It's no shock to me" said Michael Ingvestenknocken, pastor of Soli Deo Gloria Lutheran Church in St. Paul, Minnesota. "We've gone in every direction except straight for well over the past one hundred years. I'm not the least bit surprised that this has happened."

In the past 500 years since the beginning of the Reformation, many have surmised that Protestantism no longer, on the whole, represents its original foundations. Some of those foundations which are seemingly no longer important include the doctrines of Sola Scriptura, Solus Christos, Sola Fide, Sola Gratia and Soli Deo Gloria.

"We gave up on all of that sola stuff a long time ago" said Rev. Patricia Hines, pastor of Trinity Presbyterian Church (USA) in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. "While that kind of jargon worked in Luther's time, we feel the true spirit of the Reformation today lies in the questioning of what is believed to be true, and seeking out new paths of spiritual exploration. That's essentially what Luther did, he questioned the status quo. He wasn't going to be bound by a theocratic dictatorship that would tell him what to believe. I believe it was Luther who said 'My conscience is captive," and we must have the same attitude. Our consciences are free only with they become captive to our own free thinking."

While the religious world looks on in curiosity and waits for an explanation as to why Luther has done a one-eighty, many are dismissing it as merely coincidence. But the situation has brought to light the question as to whether the "Spirit of the Reformation" has indeed, by and large, been lost in Protestant Christendom.

When asked what continues to make Protestants distinct from the Roman Catholic Church one minister commented,

"I believe the 'Spirit of the Reformation' is still alive and well today. Protestants are still seeking independence from the shackles of Rome" said Rev. Brian Humphries, pastor of Little Hills Episcopal Church in Nashville, Tennessee. "We won't be bound by outdated doctrines such as the virgin birth, or the literal resurrection story like Rome still teaches. Furthermore, Rome still has this idea of sin, which we enlightened Protestants gave up on a long time ago. And even more so today the Catholic church continues to hold a very close-minded view on issues such as abortion and homosexuality, which we too have become more enlightened about. So I think the Reformation continues today."

So on this Reformation Day, in light of these strange and unusual events, many Protestants may find themselves faced with the question "Is the true Spirit of the Reformation still at work in our lives and in our churches today?"


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: itsajokeson; luther; martinluther; reformationday; satire; sectarianturmoil
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1 posted on 10/31/2007 9:46:18 AM PDT by topcat54
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To: topcat54

**showed that the Reformer has indeed “rolled over in is grave.**

Perhaps he realized his mistake.

Interesting story.


2 posted on 10/31/2007 10:00:55 AM PDT by Salvation (†With God all things are possible.†)
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To: topcat54
"While that kind of jargon worked in Luther's time, we feel the true spirit of the Reformation today lies in the questioning of what is believed to be true, and seeking out new paths of spiritual exploration. That's essentially what Luther did, he questioned the status quo. He wasn't going to be bound by a theocratic dictatorship that would tell him what to believe. I believe it was Luther who said 'My conscience is captive," and we must have the same attitude. Our consciences are free only with they become captive to our own free thinking."

Just wow.

Okay, not just wow. That is an awesome example of sophistry: Luther disagreed with the church of his time, and we disagree with the church of our time, so we're really following Luther.

Leaving aside one's opinion of the Reformation, that's an offense against thought, against general revelation.

3 posted on 10/31/2007 10:05:28 AM PDT by Mad Dawg (Oh Mary, conceived without sin, pray for us who have recourse to thee.)
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To: topcat54

**Furthermore, Rome still has this idea of sin, which we enlightened Protestants gave up on a long time ago. And even more so today the Catholic church continues to hold a very close-minded view on issues such as abortion and homosexuality, which we too have become more enlightened about. So I think the Reformation continues today.”**

I am wondering how many Protestants really agree with the author on this statement that Protestants gave up on the concept of sin, abortion, homosexuality.

Waiting for others’ feedback. There are many Protestants who do believe in sin, who do believe in the evils of homosexuality and abortion.

Strange article, in my opinion.


4 posted on 10/31/2007 10:06:03 AM PDT by Salvation (†With God all things are possible.†)
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To: topcat54; Mad Dawg; Salvation

You do know that “Tominthebox” is a humor/satire site, right?


5 posted on 10/31/2007 11:09:26 AM PDT by Flo Nightengale (long-time lurker)
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To: Salvation

There is an interesting GEICO Calvinist as caveman replacement commercial campaign satire on the site as well.


6 posted on 10/31/2007 11:45:44 AM PDT by MarkBsnr (V. Angelus Domini nuntiavit Mariae. R. Et concepit de Spiritu Sancto.)
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To: Flo Nightengale
You do know that “Tominthebox” is a humor/satire site, right?

I do, since I marked the topic as "humor". I'm not sure others do however.

7 posted on 10/31/2007 11:55:23 AM PDT by topcat54 ("Friends don't let friends listen to dispensationalists.")
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To: topcat54
I do, since I marked the topic as "humor". I'm not sure others do however.

They must be humorless.

8 posted on 10/31/2007 11:59:38 AM PDT by Alex Murphy ("Therefore the prudent keep silent at that time, for it is an evil time." - Amos 5:13)
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To: topcat54
I figured you did :) , but like you I wasn't so sure others were!
9 posted on 10/31/2007 12:07:23 PM PDT by Flo Nightengale (long-time lurker)
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To: Flo Nightengale

Whoops...I meant I wasn’t so sure others DID. (reminder to self: proofread before posting...)


10 posted on 10/31/2007 12:08:58 PM PDT by Flo Nightengale (long-time lurker)
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To: Flo Nightengale

So you are saying this is a joke?


11 posted on 10/31/2007 1:19:47 PM PDT by Salvation (†With God all things are possible.†)
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To: Salvation; topcat54
So you are saying this is a joke?

Uhhh..yeah. The site states proudly at the top of its home page that it is "theological satire." My favorite recent article title is "Heckler at Benny Hinn Miracle Service: "Don't Slay Me Bro!"

12 posted on 10/31/2007 2:16:40 PM PDT by Flo Nightengale (long-time lurker)
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To: topcat54

you fooled me,raised Lutheran,and PK.


13 posted on 10/31/2007 2:40:18 PM PDT by larryjohnson (USAF(Ret))
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To: Salvation
So you are saying this is a joke?

would Lundenfestenaker be German or Scandinavian? If you have that one figured out, how bout Ingvestenknocken?

14 posted on 10/31/2007 5:32:06 PM PDT by GoLightly
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To: GoLightly

The serious replies on this thread are funnier than the actual article!


15 posted on 10/31/2007 5:46:25 PM PDT by bonfire
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To: Salvation
"I am wondering how many Protestants really agree with the author on this statement that Protestants gave up on the concept of sin, abortion, homosexuality."

Aside from the Presbys and Episscopaleyans, I'd say about the same as the catholics. The author is likely a member of one of the 'enlightened' sin groups.

16 posted on 10/31/2007 5:53:49 PM PDT by editor-surveyor (Turning the general election into a second Democrat primary is not a winning strategy.)
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To: topcat54
So what did he die of???

Wonder if was dead when they buried him?

17 posted on 10/31/2007 5:56:44 PM PDT by mware (Americans in armchairs....doing the job of the media.)
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To: topcat54
"I believe the 'Spirit of the Reformation' is still alive and well today. Protestants are still seeking independence from the shackles of Rome" said Rev. Brian Humphries, pastor of Little Hills Episcopal Church in Nashville, Tennessee. "We won't be bound by outdated doctrines such as the virgin birth, or the literal resurrection story like Rome still teaches. Furthermore, Rome still has this idea of sin, which we enlightened Protestants gave up on a long time ago. And even more so today the Catholic church continues to hold a very close-minded view on issues such as abortion and homosexuality, which we too have become more enlightened about. So I think the Reformation continues today."

HA! This maybe satire, but--sadly--it sums up the current theological positions of the Episcopal Church quite nicely!

18 posted on 10/31/2007 6:50:35 PM PDT by Zero Sum (Marxism is the opiate of the masses.)
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To: topcat54

This article is satirical in character. The German or Scandinavian surnames given the Lutheran pastors are obviously phony. It was written by either an evangelical Protestant or a Catholic with an ax to grind against mainline Protestant churches. Of course, liberal churches cease to be either Protestant or Christian when they abandon Biblical doctrines.


19 posted on 10/31/2007 6:57:11 PM PDT by Wallace T.
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To: topcat54

Please mark {Humor Alert} or {Satire Alert) in the title after this, please.


20 posted on 10/31/2007 7:25:32 PM PDT by Salvation (†With God all things are possible.†)
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