Real Catholics, Warts and All

CatholicExchange.com ^ | 05-19-05 | Heidi Hess Saxton

[Salvation]

by Heidi Hess Saxton

Other Articles by Heidi Hess Saxton

Real Catholics, Warts and All

05/19/05

In 1988, contemporary recording artist John Fischer launched his bestseller Real Christians (Don’t) Dance, an unabashed manifesto of those who refuse to put form ahead of substance, and charity above all.

After ten years spent in various Catholic parishes and groups, I’ve discovered that much of what Fischer says about Evangelical Protestants applies equally as well to Catholics: There are Pharisees on both sides of the great ecclesial divide, who (as Jesus observed) are excruciatingly attentive to detail, yet never think to welcome the stranger in the next pew. “Woe to you Pharisees!... For you load men with burdens hard to bear, and you yourselves do not touch the burdens with one of your fingers” (Lk 12:42-46).

In the great dance of the liturgy, for every hundred Catholics just trying to get their families through the hour without resorting to violence, one or two scribble notes for their weekly “watchdog” letter to the bishop: So-and-so botched a line here. Thus-and-such hymn, clearly labeled “Christmas,” was used during Advent. Worst of all, the priest continues to encourage his flock to hold hands during the “Our Father.” (They, of course, observe “proper form”: pointedly ignoring any outstretched hand and scowling at anyone who tries to touch them before the “sign of peace.”)

Some time ago I overheard a popular apologist sneeringly denounce anyone who thinks evangelization involves “being nice to people.” In his mind, it seems, the true evangelist is one who has the last word, wins the most points in a doctrinal verbal sparring match, or “goes in for the kill” against his (usually Protestant) opponent. Isn’t that what Jesus said: “Thus will all men know you are my disciples: If you can wrestle an estranged brother to the ground, hog-tie him, and drag him into the Church.”

No, I guess not.

Ironically, as I made my way to the fullness of the faith, it was not professional apologists or “serious” Catholics who gave me the warmest welcome (though they did produce the bulk of tapes and books that provided my initial faith formation). No, my “family of faith” album includes:

• A chain-smoking, martini-swilling mother of one high-school friend, who could never articulate her faith to my satisfaction. However, when a car accident put me in the hospital me for over a month, she figured out how to give me a bed bath and wash my hair. “I know what it feels like not to be able to touch my toes,” she told me. “Love one another, Jesus said — isn’t that what it’s all about?”

• A college friend, whom I met at a frat party just before I flunked out of engineering school. Three years later, when I went on a mission trip to Senegal, she was one of my most faithful supporters. (Initially my conscience prickled over accepting money from someone who “still needed to be saved,” but pragmatism won out.) Janice continued to correspond with me, and showed admirable grace when I confessed that I had once considered her an “unbeliever.”

• A young man who treated me with greater respect and courtesy than any of my previous “real Christian” beaus. When he proposed marriage, I refused him: I didn’t want to be “unequally yoked” with a Catholic.

• My second RCIA sponsor (the first one quit because I asked too many questions) is an enthusiastic advocate for women’s ordination. We have spirited discussions about points of Church teaching (with me taking the “conservative” position). However, I will always owe her a special debt of gratitude: At the time I most needed someone to walk with me, she welcomed me into her family.

In a visit to Mexico in 1999, the Holy Father proclaimed the nature of the “new evangelization” to which all Catholics are called, a task requiring not only a clear head, but a compassionate heart:

The new evangelization will be a seed of hope for the new millennium if you, today's Catholics, make the effort to transmit to future generations the precious legacy of human and Christian values which have given meaning to your life…. It is your role to ensure that the new generations receive a sound Christian formation during their intellectual and cultural training, to prevent the powerful progress from closing them to the transcendent. Lastly, always present yourselves as tireless promoters of dialogue and peace in the face of the predominance of might over right, and of indifference to the tragedies of hunger and disease afflicting large numbers of the population.

And so, I’d like to offer a few observations, for whatever they are worth, about the “Real Catholics” I’ve come to know and love.

• Real Catholics may not know where a particular verse is found, but they know where to find the Body and Blood of the Lord, to strengthen and sustain them.

• Real Catholics may not know how to pray a Rosary unaided, but they can be counted upon to bring over a meal to a bedridden neighbor.

• Real Catholics may resort to Cheerios and sippy cups for their toddlers at Mass, but their prayers for patience are indisputably sincere.

• Real Catholics may not win every Thanksgiving Day debate with their zealous brother-in-law, but are confident that the answers are there for the finding.

• Real Catholics occasionally grumble when Mass gets a bit long, and occasionally miss the first reading, but they know that, no matter how crazy life gets, that hour gives them what they need to get through the rest of the week.

• Real Catholics don’t always remember to genuflect toward the tabernacle when they enter the church, but they live each day humbly trying to embody the Gospel message for those who will never read the Book.

Lord, give me patience with the snippy, compassion toward the needy, and charity toward all. In my journey toward the heavenly Kingdom, let me never forget how far You had to go to get me on the right path. Amen.

© Copyright 2005 Catholic Exchange


Raised in the Evangelical Protestant tradition, Heidi Saxton was confirmed Catholic in 1993. She is the author of With Mary in Prayer (Loyola) and is a graduate student (theology) at Sacred Heart Major Seminary in Detroit, Michigan. You may contact Heidi at hsaxton@christianword.com.

[Salvation]

Who are the "Real Catholics, Warts and All" who have influenced your lives?

[Salvation]

Something a little on the lighter side. Enjoy.

[ex-snook]

Hey thanks for the read.

[aposiopetic]

(Initially my conscience prickled over accepting money from someone who “still needed to be saved,” but pragmatism won out.)

Hey, don't muzzle an ox, and all that.

[Salvation]

This one means a lot to me.

• Real Catholics may not know where a particular verse is found, but they know where to find the Body and Blood of the Lord, to strengthen and sustain them.

[Salvation]

Real Catholics brought me dinner for two weeks after I fell and broke my kneecap two summers ago.

[Mrs. Don-o]

My "real Catholics" were Church of God in Christ! Loved me out of being an agnostic political lesbian!

[aposiopetic]

Cool. Certainly I have learned from time spent in the general vicinity of Catholicism that lack of love for neighbor may well bespeak a lack of love for God. (Note: I learned this not by example but by catechesis; if I learned wrong, someone here will surely correct me.:)

What an act of charity on the part of those Real Catholics in your acquaintance to have cared for you so in your time of need. Thanks for sharing this.

[cyborg]

political lesbian??

[Salvation]

I know of some Real Catholics who stayed at a person's house to answer the phone and just watch the house while they went to their spouse's funeral. Even though they were friends -- that is what they wanted to do.

[Salvation]

Real Catholics for one of my sons brought him out of hatred of God for having taken his father through cancer, brought him into the Assembly of God Church and encouraged him as his journey continued through the Anglican Church and eventually back to the Catholic Church.

[Dutchgirl]

I was baptized a Catholic, but was confirmed a Methodist. My daughter was baptized a Methodist, but married a Catholic and this past Easter Sunday received four sacraments, first confession, first communion, confirmation and sanctification of her wedding vows.

She was helped in this endeavor by my employer and his wife. Seven years ago when I had to weigh the demands of a children's mission against the demands of raising a son with asthma, my prayer for an understanding employer led me to a Catholic couple. She became my daughter's RCIA sponsor, he allowed me to homeschool two boys and then nurse my mentally ill sister -- and then babysit my grandchild, within the carpenter's shop where I worked. They said simply, "we understand that family is more important than any other job."

Last month, my sister commited suicide. My employers have made sure that I have not gone through this alone.

In the morning, we read the "Upper Room" devotion together. Today's verse was regarding suffering and prayers for persecuted Christians. I could not imagine having gone through these past few weks without the support of my church and of my employers, and without the hope of eternal life in Christ. If Love is stronger than death (the resurrection) then Love is stronger than any denominational boundary as well...

[Mrs. Don-o]

political lesbian??

Oh, yeah. I was a confused and rebellious young woman. Glad there are no tapes...

[Campion]

You know, this is kind of an irritating article. :-(

(They, of course, observe “proper form”: pointedly ignoring any outstretched hand and scowling at anyone who tries to touch them before the “sign of peace.”)

A concern for liturgical propriety doesn't really exist in tension with the authentic virtue of charity. My unwillingness to grab a stranger's hand at the Our Father has nothing to do with "not liking them" or "not being a nice person" and everything to do with wanting to obey liturgical law as constituted by the Church -- and wanting to encourage others to do so as well.

Besides that, holding someone's hand is a gesture of affection, not an act of charity. Adults (I hope!) understand the distinction between the two (not all affection is charitable; charity doesn't require physical affection).

That's not Pharisaism, and I object to having it called such.

As far as greeting the person in the pew next to me, I greet people after Mass. While in the presence of the Blessed Sacrament, our focus should be on Jesus, not on social interaction with our neighbor.

I guess my bottom-line objection to the article is that it confuses affection and social courtesy with charity. Charity is always appropriate; affection and socializing sometimes are, and sometimes aren't.

[cyborg]

Oh well wasn't sure if it was a play on words. Ooops! thanks for the clarifications. People do change though :-)

[Mershon]

How sentimental. How quaint. How many "either" "or" statements can be posited, when the real solution is "both-and."

Real Catholics don't need to be theologians. But real Cathoics do not consciously reject doctrines of the Faith. Real Catholics obey the magisterium in all things, especially in how we worship God (See Leviticus!). Real Catholics understand we are supposed to do the acts of charity completely and totally and solely for the love of God--not due to our own vanity.

Real Catholics... Well, you get the drift. Campion is right. There is a lot of judging about intentions going on in this article.

[Salvation]

I can see your side of things if these things take place in church. The article only referenced a few. I think the main part of being a Catholic is how we reach out to those around us:
family
friends,
co-workers,
acquaintances,
the wider community at the grocery store, on the street, in prison, recovering alcoholics.....................the list goes on and on and on and on to include all humanity.

[Salvation]

So how do you reach out to others in your community in addition to chatting with them after church? Do you lead a Bible study or a faith-sharing group?

Are you involved in St. Vincent dePaul Society or the Knights of Columbus?

All acts of charity there.

[Salvation]

Good advice.