Uday & Qusay Permanently Recalled.

Own twisted sense of humor | 07-23-03 | PsyOp

[PsyOp]

Uday & Qusay Permanently Recalled.

Mosul, Iraq.

By PsyOp

Yesterday, American soldiers assigned the 101st Airborne division entered the Northern Iraqi city of Mosul to conduct a special recall election of Uday and Qusay Hussein, heirs apparent of the former Iraqi dictator Saddam Hussein. Just one year ago Saddam was re-elected by an overwhelming 99% majority of the Iraqi people. In that same election, his sons Uday and Qusay were elected to the Iraqi Senate and put in charge of much of the government’s bureaucracy.

Since then, Iraqi citizen had come to regret the decision, if in fact they made it all. Allegations of election fraud, illegal campaign financing, and voter intimidation have surfaced, throwing the election results into doubt. Furthermore, a cover-up of gross financial mismanagement by the country’s leading paper, Babil, owned by Uday Hussein, has angered many Iraqis. It has since come to light that Saddam and sons had squandered the nations resources on such things as weapons of mass destruction, welfare payments to foreign suicide bombers, and the building ostentatious palaces for themselves and other Bath party loyalists. When asked for comment, all Saddam could say was “at least I kept the lights on.”

In April of this year, an army of petition gatherers descended on Iraq to gather signatures for a recall election designed to remove Saddam and his regime from power, and restore responsible government to Bahgdad. The petition drive, one of the most successful in history, gathered the necessary number of signatures, but couldn’t get the U.N. and former Iraqi allies like France and Germany to qualify them. France and Germany both accused the petition gatherers of “sour grapes”, and accused George Bush of thwarting the will of the voters.

Eventually, however, the Iraqis qualified the petitions themselves, in spite of Saddam Loyalist attempts to harass petition gathers and disrupt the process. Vowing to “fight like Bengal Tigers” (and endangered species), Saddam and his sons claimed they would fight the recall attempt to the very end.

Refusing interviews, the trio has issued a number of taped statements meant to rally their supporters and rebuild their waning political base. But time ran out for Uday and Qusay the other day when the polls opened up in Mosul. Votes were counted and exchanged during a four-hour period which poll-watchers described and “hectic” and “intense.” In the end, though, it was clear that the votes were decidedly against Uday and Qusay, who were permanently recalled from office. As one voter stated, “their political careers are now dead.” Dental records were used to ensure that the votes would not be disqualified due to hanging chads or other unidentifiable body parts.

When reminded that no one had yet been chosen to replace them, a local Mosul man replied “Who cares? The fleas of a rabid camel could a better job than Hussein and his Bath party.”

Due to Iraqi election laws, those being recalled must be present at the time the votes are taken and counted. The hunt for Saddam, who vowed to fight to the end, is now on, but he is proving hard to find. Locals here are not surprised at this type of under-handed political tactic from Hussein to avoid the recall, but they are confident that the will of the voters will be heard.

[prophetic]

well at least they didnt have to deal with the like of Al Bore, Joe LIE-berman and the rest of the DemonRatz plus a kangaroo court to usurp the votes.

also in this instance the military votes DO count :-)

[Diogenesis]

[eyespysomething]

Wonderful. Good job!!

[PsyOp]

Ping.

[PsyOp]

"also in this instance the military votes DO count :-)"

Great line! I should have worked that in somehow.

[steveegg]

Humor bunp for an excellent piece.

[genefromjersey]

So: Saddam's Beamish Boys arrive in Paradise. They are met by Mohammad, who is wearing a skullcap.

The lads look a bit surprised, and Mohammad says : " Nu ? They didn't tell you ? "

The boys look a bit confused, but Big Mo ushers them inside.

" Come in ! Come in ! You want, maybe, a nice glass of tea ?Some chicken soup ? No ? "

"Listen,boychiks : I've got good news, and I've got bad news".

"The good news is, yes: this is the Paradise that has been set aside for you." He leads them into a torchlit room and gestures expansively. " We've even got the torture chambers you boys were so fond of. "

"Here ! Look at the restraints." Mohammad, moving rather deftly,shackles each of them to the wall." Look at the workmanship ! Did you ever see such quality ? "

There is a sound of rushing feet in the adjoining passageway,accompanied by muffled, high-pitched giggles.

Mohammad beams. " You've even got 72 virgins - each - and I have to warn you, they are feeling very " frisky "!

Uday and Qusay look at each other and begin to grin.If they weren't shackled,they would probably give each other high fives.

Mohammad smiles benevolently, and walks to the door. " Enjoy ! Enjoy ! ".

Suddenly he stops and slaps his head. " Oy ! I almost forgot to give you the bad news " !

"Your 72 virgins ? They are all very horny, very sadistic transvestites

[buffyt]

I got this message in email, so I will try to clean it up a bit, it is choppy. Rachel is my friend's grown daughter who works with pregnant unmarried teens in Detroit. This is about one of her charges. EMAIL FOLLOWS:

I have to tell you this story: you are going to be blown away. get this:

Rachel called:

"Oh mom, I got a new client, SHE IS FROM IRAQ. She is 17 and you won't believe her story in a million years..... mom, she is so nice and so pretty..... get a load of this":
"This girl has been through the mill. Okay, her father worked for the Iraq police. When she was 5 years old, SADDAM HUSSEIN CAME TO HER HOUSE AND KILLED HER FATHER AND HER BROTHER RIGHT IN FRONT OF HER... (~ At this point, I am telling Rachel, this girl needs to be on Fox news interviewed by Rita Cosby....~ ).

She, her mother and her brother and (maybe one more sibling, not sure) fled to Saudi Arabia. Then they arranged to come to the US. She got to New York City with just the clothes on her back. She ended up getting married at 13 because it was prearranged. (I asked Rachel, what did her father do? and she said that the girl said that he did NOTHING to deserve this, she said that everything you hear about Saddam is TRUE, the guy is very very evil)
(btw, the girl remembers this CRYSTAL CLEAR WHAT HAPPENED AND STILL HAS NIGHTMARES ABOUT IT, SHE DOESN'T LIKE TO BE ALONE, I DON'T BLAME HER.....) So here she is in the US married to this muslim guy, okay, she has baby, then she finds husband cheating on her with someone else, and she divorces him, and that was okay with the husband. See, if the husband didn't want to divorce, it would not be okay.

So she and the mother and her son and her brother end up in Dearborn, MI, where half the middleastern pop. pract. in the US is.... and her brother tries to take her over, telling her what to do, etc, you know like doing what all the middleeastern men do, TREAT WOMEN LIKE SH*T, and starts beating this girl up more than once.......

Anyway, she ends up at salvation army staying there till they can get a court order against her brother.... her mother is watching her child in Dearborn..... she tells Rachel, "Oh Rachel, you don't know how good you have it here in the US, she tells Rachel, "All I want to do is get a job and apt. and support my child......." Rachel feels so sorry for her...... She is going to keep me informed about what happens tomorrow............

....unbelievable, but believable.

[DonQ]

This week Jessica Lynch was welcomed by her hometown of Palestine, West Virginia, for a prolonged recuperation. And also this week the Hussein brothers were welcomed into the nethermost ring of Hell for a much longer stay.

[MeekOneGOP]

hehe ! Thanks for the ping and post ! Good job!

$30 Million worth of trash

[PsyOp]

No hanging chads there...

[El Gato]

"Your 72 virgins ? They are all very horny, very sadistic transvestites

These two are so sick, they'd probably like that notion. Besides the U.S. Surpreme Court says it's just fine.

[MeekOneGOP]

Yep ! Punched CLEAN through.

[SAMWolf]

Now cremate the bodies, throw the ashes into a batch of porcelin, makes toilets out of the porcelin, and replace all the toilets in the womans restrooms at Yankee Stadium.

[MeekOneGOP]

LOL !!

[Ragtime Cowgirl]

I believe Rachel. The world should all know by now:

XTales of Saddam's Brutality [lengthy, graphic]

XSilent No Longer: Iraqi People Reveal the Past
American Forces Press Service ^ | June 26, 2003 | Linda D. Kozaryn

[Ragtime Cowgirl]

Thanks for the ping, Meekie.

"Will of the people!" Lol! Very funny.

Another gloating romp from a reserve officer in Queasy's former haunting grounds:

*The End of Ugly and Queasy
L.T. SMASH - LIVE FROM THE SANDBOX | 23 July 2003 | L.T. SMASH

[MeekOneGOP]

Thanks for the link !

[Sir Francis Dashwood]

That can't possibly be Uday, his mustache is crooked...