Posted on 01/01/2021 9:35:35 PM PST by xp38
Tesla is giving its owners another way to express their individuality from behind the wheel of their vehicles. As if they needed it.
The EV maker released its Holiday Update, Firmware 2020.48.25 on Christmas Day, adding a few little gifts for recently built Teslas, including the ability to make the car fart or bleat like a goat at the outside world on command.
Through the new Boombox feature, users can now change their horn noise to a bunch of stock sounds including goat, applause, La Cucaracha, holiday music, coconuts and fart, each projected outward from an external speaker near the front of the vehicle. Boombox is available only on those Teslas (2019 and newer) fitted with the external speakers.
The best and likely to be the most offensive part of the new horn sound system is the potential customization, which allows users to upload up to five custom sounds from a USB drive. Something tells us we’ll be writing more headlines about this feature shortly—
The Holiday Update also tweaks the screen display and driving visualizer, plus adds some new games including Solitaire and something called Cat Quest, but who really cares about that. Because, you know, farts!
TESLA- the Eric Swalwell Edition
I dunno what queefing is and I do not wanna know.
You will no doubt get arrested.
You're right, and so I won't tell you.
What I will tell you is that men have three orifices from which gas may be expelled rapidly, making a characteristic noise. The mouth (belch), the nose (sneeze), and the anus (fart).
Women have four.
Thanks! That sounds a LOT like what we heard! It wasn’t a Tesla, but sounded very much like that — kind of like a wanna-be baby ICE.
Queefing has nothing to do with homosexuality. Are you sure you didn't mean something like felching?
Kevmo: Don't look up felching. Seriously, don't do it. You REALLY don't want to know.
That option is offered as part of the Lumpy Spurtscar audio package.
If I had the farts that I have now been available in HS, I would be legend. :^)
No way I look nor care. Thanx 4 the heads up.
How about a dixie horn like the dukes of Hazzard ?
... but Tesla target market are wokeness signalling assh@les so I guess not.
I want horns that sound like a machine gun going off.
You know you’re successful when you have a Tesla that barks and farts.
.... Got mine to Mooooo ... Like a Cow ..... In a Horsie Neighorhood it had some folks confused LOL
Eric Swalwell’s car?
I want one that sounds like a woman having a screaming orgasm.
Not me. I get tired of hearing that every day, morning, noon, and night.
Is that the thing with the rodents?
If so, I remember a story from the early 90’s about two guys in San Francisco who “played” with their pet gerbil.
Long story short, the gerbil got scared, one guy had his nose broken and eyebrows singed when he lit a match causing the gerbil to be shot out like a flaming cannonball. The other guy got second and third degree burns, and the gerbil didn’t make it.
Joe Cartoon’s GerBill:
https://youtu.be/mc6i4Ar6TRY
No, it's a lot more disgusting and only involves humans.
Your mention of Joe Cartoon takes me back to a more innocent (sort of) time of the Internet. Hoo-hoo washing and electric light sockets and so forth. Laughed my ass off multiple times watching those.
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