Posted on 07/24/2018 11:14:28 AM PDT by servo1969
I love women. Not in the social justice warrioresque "We must praise women as strong, capable CEOS and STEM graduates who can do anything men can do, but in heels" way, but in an old-school way. It's easy to respect a mother who watches out for her children, a wife who is loyal to her husband, or a sister who cares for her brother. I love a beautiful woman. I love a sexy woman. I love a woman who gives off that amazing feminine energy. As a man, being around a woman like that is just good for your spirit.
All that being said, this is not about the more wonderful traits of women. To the contrary, it's the kind of warning about women that fathers used to give their sons, but that's frowned upon today. You see, in our society we can hammer home the faults of men until they become stereotypes, but we're not supposed to point out the similarly damaging, but often very different flaws of women that young men need to worry about.
I think lions are extraordinarily beautiful and powerful creatures, but I also know if you make a wrong move around one, you can lose an arm. Women are much the same. They are magnificent but dangerous and since men pursue them, they need to understand what they're getting into.
Men don't like to admit this, but the first thing they think about when it comes to women is beauty. Not only are we drawn to it, but it's a status symbol. When a man has an attractive woman, other men think more of him. In fact, it can become such a powerful draw that some men put beauty first and second -- and whatever comes third doesn't matter. This is a mistake if you plan to be with her beyond a date or three because beauty fades for all of us, but it fades faster and harder for women. Moreover, beauty in and of itself only attracts for so long. As the old saying goes, "No matter how good she looks, someone out there is tired of her sh*t." Point being, make sure you judge a woman on a lot more than beauty alone because the time is going to come when one way or the other, that beauty is going to fade in your eyes.
Men tend to be famously ruthless about relationships a few dates in when women fall for them way too early and the men only care about sex. On the other hand, women tend to be much more ruthless than men when a relationship is ending. This is hard for a lot of men to believe because they can't imagine the sweet, uplifting, nurturing woman they were in a relationship with is taking them to the cleaners in divorce court or using their kids as a bargaining chip after the divorce.
Women tend to put the same kind of emphasis on status that men put on beauty. That doesn't mean it's the end all and be all of everything, but it does mean status is a lot more important to women than it is to men. What that means is that as a man, if you ever stop performing at the level your woman is accustomed to, you may lose her regardless of everything else. Lose your job, get demoted, take a big pay cut, lose your moxie somehow and women are much more likely to walk away than a man would be with a woman in the same situation. That doesn't mean it's a given, but it does mean that going backward in status as a man risks your relationship with a woman.
There are exceptions to every rule, but the most stable woman is as emotional as an unstable guy. Women are more emotional, more hormonal than men. Women are, at best, more tolerant of drama than men and at worst, they seek it out. They will become upset for no good reason, act irrationally, and are more prone to things like anxiety than men. The point of this is not "women are unstable and bad," it's that women are very different in this area and you need to be ready to deal with it. At times there's going to be crying, no matter what you do. At times, your girlfriend / lover / wife is going to become angry at you even though you've done nothing wrong. Wise men learn that there are times to ignore things women say rather than get in a fight because ten minutes later, their mood will improve. To men who aren't used to it, all of this can be freaky, but it can also help keep things fresh and exciting once you learn to navigate it.
If your woman is stronger than you, she may still date you. She may love you. She may even marry you one day. However, on a fundamental level, she will not be able to respect you if you are not strong and competent enough to lead her. Women don't want to be the ones who make all the decisions and wear the pants in the family and if you force her to do that, it will wear on her and she will come to resent you. How will that resentment play out? At best, probably unhappiness and at worst, cheating, divorce or contempt that's so bad that you wish you were divorced. I'm not telling you to be a jerk, but I am telling you that if you are not a stronger person than your woman, you will ultimately be sorry.
Advice for dealing with lunatics, or cobras.
A guy named "Donald" comes to mind ...
Your hubby obviously knows this list, chapter and verse ;-)
I kind of feel sad for people who spout the old worn out mantra that beauty fades. If you love someone, you’ll always see the initial beauty you saw in them. Whether it’s in their eyes, the way they smile, the way they carry themselves, or even the look in their eyes that you send back, you’ll still see the original beauty.
If you don’t, I’m not convinced you were ever fully enchanted by them. And if not, why did you ever sign on?
This isn’t to say they can’t destroy that connection, if they go off the deep end. If they remain a true loyal devoted partner with you, it just doesn’t have to end.
Relationships are more than just two people. They are places, certain times, and all the wonderful things you have shared together. No one else will know those moments better than you two. If something should happen to break you up, you’ve just erased all the pleasant memories from decades of your life.
All those places where you used to go and share laughs, kisses, and special looks, will become no more than a familiar place missing the true spark that made it what it used to be. They will become haunted...
If there are children involved, you are stealing from them. They will never be able to fully appreciate the beauty of the moments before the split. Nice work.
If you love someone, go all in. Don’t hold back. determine that you will never let that person go. Work to keep them. Be willing to go that extra mile. Be willing to fight for them if they start to fail or stray. Convince them of how much they mean to you. Nothing says I don’t give a darn about you, as well as the idea you don’t care if they go or not.
Look folks, not every relationship is going to turn into the wonderful future you thought it would be. There can be major setbacks, and a hard life for the two of you. That in and of itself can actually be a shared experience that endears you to each other.
If you have troubles, think of the hardship, and the beauty if the two of you can get through it, learn from it, and grow even closer together.
Life is what you make of it. You will decide to be happy, positive, and a contributing partner that brings new life to the relationship, or you will decide to be unhappy, negative, and suck the life blood out of everything you touch.
In life, it’s more up to you than you think.
If two people love each other and decide to be happy, they will always be happy.
Can all relationships be saved? No. There are times when you’ll have to say good-bye.
Don’t let it be you, that causes this rift in the universe.
Also, they will never ever leave you alone. Something snaps in their weird chick lizard brain if they see you “doing nothing”.
They have the arrogance to ask what you want to do... never thinking for a moment that this is precisely what you already ARE doing.
Many women can go from Sweetie to pure Bitch in about or less than 0.65 seconds.
Careful, I am out of estrogen and I have a gun.
I know several women who were considered very plain looking when we were real young and as they aged they became more beautiful (in looks) every year. Now in their 50s they are all still getting better looking while the girls who were pretty when they were younger now mostly look like a sack of potatoes.
Corollary to the 5 truths.
1. It’s important to find a woman that helps out around the house from time to time and who has a job.
2. It’s important to find a woman who can make you laugh.
3. It’s important to find a woman that you can trust and who won’t lie to you.
4. It’s important to find a woman who loves to spend time with you, to include the bedroom.
5. It’s very, very, important that these four women never meet or know of each other or you could end up very, very dead.
“A man is in general better pleased when he has a good dinner upon his table than when his wife talks Greek.” — Samuel Johnson (1709-1784)
We have to, because sheep can't cook.
Short and sweet version told to me by a man. He believed every woman was at least a little crazy.
My advice. Don’t argue with them when they go off the deep end, which is often. Just listen and move on or try to get away from them until they come back to normal.
Lime cral is some nasty stuff.
My mother was always nuts. She was still nuts, but less so, both during and after, menopause. Her mother was an abusive crazy woman before menopause. I only knew her afterwards, but she was always pretty good natured. Neither of them were prepared or suited for the huge responsibility and stress of raising a family. Once the kids were grown, their stress levels decreased markedly. I like to think I’m at least a little less crazy than either one of them, but I never really had any menopausal symptoms. A lot of women feel better once their hormones start decreasing. But some women have terrible symptoms as their hormones decrease. Just depends on the woman. If we have too much estrogen, when it starts to wane, we feel better. I’ve never had to take estrogen replacement therapy. When I stopped ovulating, my lifelong depression decreased.
I’m with you. Under 30 and I can’t deal.
I just lived these observations in a divorce two years ago. No warning. She’s decided she wants to relive high school (she’s a high school math teacher). The kids have moved on from her. Totally different woman than the one I met.
You wouldn’t believe the tactics in the end game. Unbelievable, and with no thought to the kids at all.
I would settle for someone with a sense of humor who doesn’t take themselves too seriously, and Christian. Hate having to explain that or make allowances for that.
Change the word "seconds" to "micro seconds" and you have my wife.
They have cooties
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