Posted on 07/24/2018 11:14:28 AM PDT by servo1969
You're losing frame, bro.
So she's achieved lifelong happiness that many times, eh?
Or, as Nobel Prize winning physicist Leon Lederman said in the introduction to a physics textbook,
"I feel like Zsa Zsa Gabor's seventh husband. I mean, I know what to do, but how do you make it interesting?"
Ignore Ryan O'Neal
The most important rule is: Never, ever be “vulnerable” and tell her anything that would hurt your feelings later. Because for the rest of your life she will use it like a dagger and stab you repeatedly whenever she is angry. If she calls your a nasty name and it doesn’t bother you, then don’t tell her that.
LOL!
makes no sense.
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Your entire post is the best of the thread. I hope people will read it several times and heed your wisdom.
“Relationships are more than just two people. They are places, certain times, and all the wonderful things you have shared together. No one else will know those moments better than you two. If something should happen to break you up, you’ve just erased all the pleasant memories from decades of your life.
All those places where you used to go and share laughs, kisses, and special looks, will become no more than a familiar place missing the true spark that made it what it used to be.”
Thank you. I appreciate your response, and note of agreement.
Benjamin Franklin said the same thing. He said "they're grateful."
I many case older women have shed the high school girl crud.
I didn't date much in high school because of the stupid high school games and when I joined the Air Force at 18 years old I refused to date the locals because they still had that attitude. I also refused to date a civilian girl even a year younger than me because she would still be in high school while I was on ICBM launch crew fighting the Cold War. Two different levels with no understanding in between.
I actually went for girls that were a bit older than me and the ones that I was really attracted to were also in the Air Force and understood the commitment.
Funny, good replies and some good builds. The original 5 truths are pretty much spot on correct. I’ll weigh in because I have time to waste and a mouth to run, so-to-speak:
1. Beauty fades
a. Dang sure does. Take a good look at the girls mother on the surface and what is inside her. Take time to get to know her if you can. If you don’t like what you see, move on because you are more than likely looking at your wife in 20 to 25 years. If you can’t get to know the mother, move on as well. Moving on can be very hard to do.
b. See if you can manage to find love instead of lust. College is a bad place to find love. For most young people the only thing in common is deadlines and pressure and the social scene. It is an artificial life. Sadly it is also the last broad based selection of people you will find. Try to get a job, figure out a few more things.
c. Do not marry out of loneliness. It is as bad as marrying for lust. If you can’t find a good mate and are still lonely get a pet from an animal shelter and you’ll both be appreciated.
d. Better to marry than to burn but second degree burns will not hurt you. [1 Cor 7:9] Wait, you’ll get over the burning.
e. A Virtuous Woman? Proverbs 31:10-31... Good luck
f. A husbands duties? 1 Peter 3:7 Very big shoes to fill that require humility, extreme wisdom and the patience of Job.
g. If you find a friend and companion you will find beauty every day.
h. Look for someone with your same energy and enthusiasm. You don’t want to be pushed or have to pull someone along. They will be like a wet blanket over your life.
i. They claim men age like wine. Your own looks will fade. Even wine turns to vinegar.
j. If she is pouty, petulant, unreasonable in arguments, peevish, fretful, cross, snappy, grumpy, crabby or otherwise often or unjustifiably disagreeable... move on there will be others that are better suited to you and you to them.
k. From the time you marry a woman sets upon a project to change you while you will just wish she would remain as you married her. They often turn into petty, prudish old women while they are still relatively young. They can also go the other way.
l. If you seek a life like a wonderful story from the movies you should know that they happen but not very often.
m. Visit a nursing home before you get really serious about the beauty or handsome person before you. See what one of you may be like near the end. Is this someone you want to care for and be with then?
2. You may be surprised at the ruthless treatment you get.
a. “...better to live in a desert than with a quarrelsome and fretful woman.” Proverbs 21:19 and then some and more.
b. Henry Higgins said it well in “My Fair Lady”: “Women are heartless gutter snipes.” They are also sociopaths when angry. They don’t get even, they get ahead and they don’t even have to be right, just justified in their own minds.
c. Someone rightly said that when a man gets really angry he may hurt you, you’ll probably get over that in time. When a woman gets angry she aims to keep you alive but break your heart and destroy your life. She will have absolutely no sense of fair, equitable or ethical. She simply wants to hurt you with all the power she has.
3. Much more status-oriented than men
a. If you don’t believe this try taking their status away. Even the most humble church-going, feigning non-materialism woman wants status of their own or referred.
b. The article says this well enough.
4. Women are not as stable as men.
a. Never will be. They are the weaker vessel but these days they don’t believe that
b. You can be a mess of raging hormones that can push you into marriage. They are a mess or raging hormones for most of their lives. It is mostly like living with the beast from Jekyll and Hyde. I am not even remotely kidding.
c. Deep at heart most women are psychotic in one way or another at various times in their lives.
5. Women may come to hate you for your weakness
a. If they don’t hate you already they will take advantage of every single foible you have ever committed. They will not be able to remember where you just went for vacation last week but they can remember the slightest transgression you made 25 years ago and the longer they know you the more they will remember as a growing catalog of your flaming screw-ups and they will eventually hate you for them. At the slightest provocation and smallest opening they will stab the events into your ribs and vital organs. The gaps of forgiveness and relative tranquility will all disappear into one simmering rage and hatred of all that you do. It is only a matter of time and some take longer than others.
In the past women became economic prisoners of a sort, before they had careers and the ability to support themselves. Men took advantage of that, didn’t do what they were supposed to do. They were lousy. It has gone too far the other way now though. Women don’t need men and treat them the same way.
Great post.
My wife for a long time had to keep reminding me that “You say you’re sorry, but then you don’t change! Just saying sorry over and over again doesn’t cut it!”
One of my favorite videos is the marriage counselor (a Christian) that does seminars and is pretty funny. But - I think he does a good job pointing out the differences between men and women, and how to accept and deal with them.
The REALLY good one is where he talks about Men’s brains vs. Women’s brains. I think that it is pretty accurate.
Mark Gungor:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3XjUFYxSxDk
How about when the wyfe decided suddenly to not work for 5 yrs and spends every day on the Internet doing “research” on unknown subjects and was poisoning your food as well?
Sounds like a scene from Guardians of the Galaxy 2.
I find that if you do regular maintenance to keep the engine purring, run them, and keep them lubricated, they'll last for decades. The ones that last become "classics".
Sounds like you made good choices!
An average-looking woman who is willing to make an effort to keep you happy, is worth more than a beautiful woman who is not willing.
Like I said, they are trying for a high-status guy (the "Alpha" males), they understand that a high-status guy has options, and if they don't keep him happy, then some other girl will. After a long while, she might lose hope in getting a commitment from an Alpha, and decide to settle for a guy who might not excite her, but at least has a decent income. Then later rape him in divorce court.
We would all be hard pressed to find a better life philosophy than this!
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