Demasculation of America's Boys

Townhall.com ^ | September 8, 2009 | Rebecca hagelin

[Kaslin]

Every time I write about how the modern culture seems dead-set on destroying the confidence of America's little boys, I am swamped with e-mail. It seems that everyone with a son or grandson has a story to tell about how manhood and chivalry are under attack. Last week I heard from a dad, Bill, who echoes the sentiments of many: "The boys are getting emasculated and wimpy/passive as they're now intimidated by girls due to fear of sex harassment charges and pro-female/anti male societal/educational tilts."

Sadly, he's right. As a mom of two sons and a youth leader I have seen how boys cringe when television shows depict boys as crude and stupid while the girls are always smart and powerful. I've experienced their confusion when girls snub them for opening the door. One day I observed the pained looks on the faces of male highschool students when a teacher explained that a major assignment would be to watch a movie of their choice and write a paper on how women in the film are discriminated against.

The attacks on our boys are endless and very purposeful: if they are taught to be nothing more than crude dolts then they will become emasculated men who keep to themselves. And the women will end up wearing the pants.

I've also observed on countless occasions a minor, but powerful, display of how ours is quickly becoming a culture where men are having trouble being men: females struggling alone to lift a heavy suitcase into the overhead compartment on a plane all the while surrounded by men who pretend they don't see.

My reader, Bill, also said:

"The feminists that sold us on there being no discernable difference between men and women except their plumbing have done an immeasurable disservice to women, the family, and hence society."

I would add that this trend toward emasculation is also destroying the dignity and potential of countless young boys.

Decide to raise your sons to be gentlemen - that means teaching them to be both courageous and considerate. To create young men of valor, you have to spend a significant amount of time deprogramming them of the lies the culture bombards them with at every turn. Talk about the raunchy scenes in TV shows, commercials and music that depict males as irrelevant or disposable. Or better yet, filter out those messages altogether.

If you are a dad or the primary male in the life of a boy, the most effective method to ensure that he becomes a man of dignity is to consciously model the behavior for him. If you are a mom with no positive adult male to help you raise your son, find one.

Seek out great organizations like the Boy Scouts or find a church family that will help you. In the meantime, develop a habit of reading stories of brave, kind men so they can imagine themselves becoming that way too. One great resource for books, tapes and movies to help you raise boys you can be proud of is www.VisionForum.com.

America really needs more than just a few good men - help your son be one of them.

[panaxanax]

>>”Excuse me But I don’t have TO GET OVER IT!”<<

You have proven your own point, in that “Women may be “weaker” in certain areas ....”

Stop arguing with yourself.

LOL and thanks.

[stevie_d_64]

Subtlety is being tossed out the window...

They have to hurry to get it in the minds of mush out there...

[Lucky Dog]

Because when it’s put like that, “fairer” makes it sound as if women are weaker…

Please note in the definitions below, extracted from a respectable dictionary, there is absolutely not connotation or implication of weakness. Rather, the word is generally used to refer appearance or equity.

Therefore, you statement makes no sense in standard English.

fair 1 (fâr)

adj. fair·er, fair·est
Of pleasing appearance, especially because of a pure or fresh quality; comely.
Light in color, especially blond: fair hair.
Of light complexion: fair skin.
Having or exhibiting a disposition that is free of favoritism or bias; impartial: a fair mediator.
Just to all parties; equitable: a compromise that is fair to both factions.
Free of clouds or storms; clear and sunny: fair skies.
Free of blemishes or stains; clean and pure: one's fair name.
Promising; likely: We're in a fair way to succeed.
Having or exhibiting a disposition that is free of favoritism or bias; impartial: a fair mediator.
Just to all parties; equitable: a compromise that is fair to both factions.
Being in accordance with relative merit or significance: She wanted to receive her fair share of the proceeds.
Consistent with rules, logic, or ethics: a fair tactic.
Moderately good; acceptable or satisfactory: gave only a fair performance of the play; in fair health.
Superficially true or appealing; specious: Don't trust his fair promises.
Lawful to hunt or attack: fair game.
Archaic Free of all obstacles.

The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition
Copyright © 2009 by Houghton Mifflin Company.
Published by Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

Women may be “weaker” in certain areas .... but better/stronger than men in others....so would that make men “the fairer sex” in those instances?

In terms of physical strength and endurance, please note that “on average” (a significant portion of the population being above, and a significant portion, below) women are weaker than men. In relation to other physical characteristics, statistically, men tend to be slightly more adept at target directed skills and women more so at fine motor skills. In terms of character, intelligence, morality, and other, non-physical traits, neither sex is statistically superior nor inferior to the other.

However, in the reference to which you took exception, i.e., the fairer sex, there is no connotation of superiority in any quality other than beauty. There is an old saying that notes “beauty is in the eye of the beholder,” thus it is obviously a matter of opinion. Nonetheless, the phrase is complementary, not demeaning in any stretch of the imagination and has nothing to do with strength, either in the physical sense nor any other.

Caution, even aversion, is appropriate to “reading” meaning into words and phrases that have nothing to do with their standard definitions. Such a path has led us the current state of affairs with the manipulative machinations of Political Correctness.

[Awestruck]

I was lucky enough to land myself a gentleman.. who was the son of a gentleman, who was the son of a gentleman.. boys learn by watching.. and my man learned well, watching men who could be a warrior when duty called, and who knew how to treat a woman. Old school men know the difference between gentleman and wimp. Ladies, I would recommend you forego these metrosexual pretty boys and find yourselves a real man.

[PSYCHO-FREEP]

We can’t even watch a soap commercial where the man is not a stupid, obnoxious, lazy, immature, moronic idiot who ALWAYS says and does the wrong thing, only to be “corrected” by the all so intelligent, mentally superior, skilled and competent woman who steps in to straighten out the situation that the man caused to get so far out of control due to his incompetent nature.

[luvie]

“Not all women mind being treated well.”

I sure don’t mind!!! Kindness and respect go a long way to
make me sit up and notice!

Thank you for raising your son to be a gentleman. You have
done a good thing and he is most likely handsome, too.
The girls will fall in love with him and then you’ll have
another kind of worry! LOL!

But he will go far in the “real world” where manners count for something!
We women notice those things and approve...unless we have
an ax to grind.

[kalee]

ping

[wardaddy]

I'm 52 and have observations with 3 non emasculated lads and 2 non fembotted lasses:

I will speak only of what we can call white upper middle class college degreed social strata of which I am a member in good standing (though I am very comfortable with those outside my particular demographic..my daddy taught me that):

1) Women coddle boys too much today and insist on holding them back a year at pre-k or pre-first at a rate of around 80%

2) Men often do the same so they can be bigger for sports...teaching cheating already in my opinion..not to mention the vicarious thing

3) Single moms are not tough taskmasters anymore but rather shrill yellers who rarely discipline and just drone on and on about what they are gonna do but never do and kids know this.

4) Single moms too often let bad men in the home for their own pleasure which endangers the kids..very bad.

5) Schoolteachers reflect this coddling and refuse to let boys be boys...no roughhousing, zero tolerance for fighting...an environment which mutes boys and raises teasing to a new height since there is no immediate consequence anymore like in my day like a bloody nose.

6) Popular TV culture enforces this sweet stuff with Barney, Teletubbies and Dora...enough is enough.

7) Guns are to be feared or better yet...loathed.

8) If you are a white kid then you know early on you must owe non whites something since your culture was ahead..till now anyhow.

9) Fashion....girl pants, Martin short haircuts, little vests, pointy shoes on guys that are waifish..so gay.

10) Speaking of which..homosexuality is the new black. Forrest Whitaker was the cool black guy in Fast Times at Ridgemont High...now it's the cakeboy. When I was in high school we had sissies, we did not yet know they were homosexual at aged 15-17...stupid us...we could have worshipped them.

11) Men have become less masculine looking...it's amazing. They are more frail (i’m talking whites...blacks and many latinos are getting bigger..much bigger)and with dainty little chins..glass I'm sure.

It's funny as the men get more frail and girly looking, the women get fatter and fatter...

that's just what my wife I notice all the time around here in Nashville metro and we talk about it a lot

the only tuff looking young men we see are occasional rural boys in pickups with a chew, Hurt Locker looking lads and those in the UFC or WEC

[IDontLikeToPayTaxes]

females struggling alone to lift a heavy suitcase into the overhead compartment on a plane all the while surrounded by men who pretend they don't see.

I don't see a problem with this situation. I believe in equality.

[HungarianGypsy]

My hobby is medieval reenactment. There have been times that I cannot lift anything without a gentleman carrying it for me. “Thank you, but the loaf of bread really isn’t that heavy.”

[Colonel_Flagg]

Good morning, dear lady! (definitely one of the fairer sex!)

:)

[Colonel_Flagg]

We’re working at it :)

[luvie]

Good morning to you, kind sir!

I will accept that very nice compliment! You ARE a gentleman
of the southron order!

[johnny reb]

I’m Still A Guy lyrics

When you see a deer you see Bambi
And I see antlers up on the wall
When you see a lake you think picnic
And I see a large mouth up under that log
You’re probably thinking that you’re going to change me
In some ways well maybe you might
Scrub me down, dress me up but no matter what remember, I’m still a guy

When you see a priceless friend’s painting
I see a drunk, naked girl
You think that riding a wild bull sounds crazy
And I’d like to give it a whirl
Well love makes a man do some things he ain’t proud of
And in a weak moment I might walk your sissy dog, hold your purse at the mall
But remember, I’m still a guy

I’ll pour out my heart
Hold your hand in the car
Write a love song that makes you cry
Then turn right around knock some jerk to the ground
‘Cause he copped a feel as you walked by

I can hear you now talking to your friends
Saying, “Yeah girls he’s come a long way”
From dragging his knuckles and carrying a club
And building a fire in a cave
But when you say a backrub means only a backrub
Then you swat my hand when I try
Well, what can I say? At the end of the day
Honey, I’m still a guy

And I’ll pour out my heart
Hold your hand in the car
Write a love song that makes you cry
Then turn right around knock some jerk to the ground
‘Cause he copped a feel as you walked by

These days there’s dudes getting facials
Manicured, waxed and botoxed
With deep spray-on tans and creamy lotiony hands
You can’t grip a tacklebox

Well with all of these men lining up to get neutered
It’s hip now to be feminized
I don’t highlight my hair
I’ve still got a pair
Yeah honey, I’m still a guy

Oh my eyebrows ain’t plucked
There’s a gun in my truck
Oh thank God, I’m still a guy.

Brad Paisley

[denfurb]

I signed my son up for Boy Scouts to get him around boys and the leaders are all women. He is 6 yrs old and a parent has to be present at all times which will be me, his mom. At the first meeting the mom in charge is trying to get the boys to sit down, be nice, stop rough housing. o_O

[ArrogantBustard]

With deep spray-on tans and creamy lotiony hands

[luvie]

Ain’t this a true song for sure! LOL!

[Clemenza]

11) Men have become less masculine looking...it's amazing. They are more frail (i’m talking whites...blacks and many latinos are getting bigger..much bigger)and with dainty little chins..glass I'm sure.

18-25 year old skinny white boys with skinny pants, queer haircuts, and sunglasses seem to be attracted to my current nabe (Astoria, NY) like a magnet to steel. The are balanced out by fat Latino kids (the only "pumped" Latino guys I see in the metro as a whole are second generation Nuyoricans and Dominicanyork cops/construction worker types) and Greek kids who dress and act like Eurotrash (but at least have girth or muscle).

I agree completely that most of the (middle American) suburban-raised white boys pouring into the city nowadays are rather fey, and look like they couldn't throw a punch to a paper bag. The kids over in Jersey and Long Island are occasionally more masculine than the corn-fed metrosexuals, but the trend continues there as well. We've already discussed the "Wigger" phenomenon that exists among white kids in the blue collar suburbs in the past.

[Clemenza]

11) Men have become less masculine looking...it's amazing. They are more frail (i’m talking whites...blacks and many latinos are getting bigger..much bigger)and with dainty little chins..glass I'm sure.

18-25 year old skinny white boys with skinny pants, queer haircuts, and sunglasses seem to be attracted to my current nabe (Astoria, NY) like a magnet to steel. They are balanced out by fat Latino kids (the only "pumped" Latino guys I see in the metro as a whole are second generation Nuyoricans and Dominicanyork cops/construction worker types) and Greek kids who dress and act like Eurotrash (but at least have girth or muscle).

I agree completely that most of the (middle American) suburban-raised white boys pouring into the city nowadays are rather fey, and look like they couldn't throw a punch to a paper bag. The kids over in Jersey and Long Island are occasionally more masculine than the corn-fed metrosexuals, but the trend continues there as well. We've already discussed the "Wigger" phenomenon that exists among white kids in the blue collar suburbs in the past.