I’m a dog lover, send him to me. I only ask for a modest stipend of, oh, say ... $20K per month. Am I asking for Trouble, lol?
Arf arf, arf arf arf afr, arf arf arf...
Send me that dog! I will pamper that animal. 12.5 million, first thing the animal will need is a beautiful home with a big backyard and a pool to swim in. He will need a freezer filled with perfectly marbled steak. I think a new minivan would be most comfortable for him. And a luxury sedan with a nice sunroof to stick his head out of. A gardener to make sure the grounds are safe for him and a cook to ensure proper nutrition. I repeat. Send me that dog!
I hate dogs, but for $12 mil, I’d take him.
The Daily News UK did a story on wealthy dogs. Trouble is only the third wealthiest dog in the world.
I’ll take the dog. My chihuahua needs a dog to practice her martial arts bites on.
You people are all pikers!
I will take care of ‘Trouble’ and go far beyond any trifling Porsche or Lamborghini vehicular conveyance, for 12 million dollars, I will immediately contact Sir Richard Branson of Virgin Galactic, and book ‘Trouble’ on board SpaceShip One, (tickets are $200,000) and of course ‘Trouble’ will have to remain in intensive astro-mutt training until launch time is upon us.
Meanwhile, I will be making sure that 11 million 800,000 dollars is working hard on ‘Trouble’s behalf.
Heh. :)
Rumor has it that the dog has used some of that money to purchase a big farm down in a rural area in Virginia.
He's looking to buy a bunch of NFL thugs and stage fights between them . . . and he'll have the losers beaten, stomped, and electrocuted.
No. I should have sole custody of this dog because I’m a truly a “dog whisperer” and I alone know what this dog really wants and needs.
First of all Trouble needs to get a way for a while to escape the media.
I would take “Trouble” to secluded luxury resort spa in Hawaii. Trouble would need a private suite over looking the ocean because the sea air would be really good for him.
Trouble also needs some spa treatments to relax him after this ordeal and to help him deal with his grief; massages, facials, pedicures, manicures, body wraps. I of course would be forced to subject myself to these treatments first, just to make sure they wouldn’t traumatize poor Trouble. He’s been through so much you know.
Trouble also needs to get back in shape so next we’d go to a luxury health resort spa in Arizona. Of course that long flight would be so stressful on the pooch, he’d have to have some more spa treatments; massages, facials, pedicures, manicures, body wraps and some yoga. I of course would again, subject myself to these treatments first, just to make sure they wouldn’t traumatize poor Trouble.
Trouble needs to eat better and how better than with a private chef. I would have to test all the food for safety’s sake. I sense that Trouble likes people food by the way.
And Trouble needs exercise and what dog doesn’t like to chase balls? So of course I would be obligated to take private golf lessons with Tiger Woods so poor little trouble would have something to chase.
I found out that Trouble also likes running on the beach and that’s great exercise so we’d have to buy a house in Malibu so that Trouble could run on the beach any time he wanted. I would of course have to closely watch him at all times to ensure his safety. To make sure I don’t fall asleep on duty I would have to hire an assistant – a young, hot Latin cabana boy would do.
And speaking of Latin, Trouble needs to expand his cultural horizons and learn new languages and so I would have to take Trouble (First Class of course) to Italy, Spain, the French Riviera….
I and as a true “dog whisperer” I can sense that Trouble needs a make over for the stake of his self esteem. I can sense he is really is feeling down about himself lately.
So I’d take him to the best doogie stores and salons in Manhattan and LA. I’d make sure he was fitted with a diamond studded collar from Tiffany’s and just so he wasn’t made to feel uncomfortable and out of place, I’d of course have to get one too.
Needless to say, the new coiffed, buff and confident Trouble needs a companion that wouldn’t embarrass him so I’d need some designer duds: Channel, Valentino, Jimmy Cho, Kate Spade, you know the usual walking the dog outfits.
And the new and improved Trouble would have to be socialized so I’d have to take him to all the hot nightclubs, all the best restaurants….
Leona only wanted the best for him. Do I get the job?
Trouble better hire a food taster.
I love dogs. Even if it was her dog. I’ll care for the little pooch.
I always told my mother I’d rather have 10 dogs than one kid.
How's Tuesday?
Just joshin' y'all...
“But that isn’t to be either. The cemetery says state law forbids animal remains buried in human graveyards.”
When the time comes, dig her up and put her in the pet cemetery with the dog.
Send me the dog and one million and I will lavish it with love till the day it dies. I will also immediately retire.