Posted on 02/20/2007 10:25:45 AM PST by UnklGene
Al Gore Calls New York Snowstorm a Cruel Hoax -
OSWEGO, New York "I saw Bush operatives in the clouds with a snowmaking machine."
These were the words of Virtual President Al Gore completing his term as leader of exploited carbon dioxide molecules.
"It seemed quite coincidental that the same characters who worked on hanging chads and Katherine Harris bank deposits were flying around in Blackhawks working the same airborne machines they used in the Swiss Alps when they had a particularly warm winter in the 60's and needed some white stuff pronto on the slopes," noted the Global Warming Prophet.
"Tipper and I were up Syracuse organizing a mental health lecture for psychotics who refuse to wear winter bathing suits when the gusts of cold air inexplicably masked the heat wave," continued the Walking Warming Wikipedia. "Next thing you know there's a massive stormstorm and I could swear Tipper and I saw Scooter Libby and Cheney handcuffing Patrick Fitzgerald to a flying snowmaker and churning out acres full of the stuff over Oswego. Jeb Bush was up there too yelling for somebody named Frosty while reciting Christmas carols with public school children and crossing himself."
"It's 2000 all over again," added Tipper, carefully administering a shot of long acting Prolixin to the right arm of her agitated husband.
"That's right," concluded the former non-Monica-banging Vice President, hiding in summerwear under a glacier in Central New York. "I told Prince before the Super Bowl to start a party like it was 1999. I guess he was off by a year".
Great laffs!
BALLOON !! Lol, I forgot balloon.
Very nice devolve!
Hey Al,
Your birth was a cruel hoax.
Ahh, I see him peeking out of the window, lol. I like it, did you make it?
Thanks for posting to me.
Yes, thanks. Albore is so much fun to make fun of. :)
And I always enjoy yours and devolve's graphics.
This is a pretty sad statement about AlGore -- I was all the way to paragraph three before I realized it was satire!!! LOL
Thank you so much, that made my day!!
"Stay on target! Aiiiiieee!"
Great comic!
Heh... reminds me of that "headline" shown at the end of the movie "Stripes", with the picture of a very unhappy, fur-lined-parka-wearing John Larroquette above the text: "Arctic Command Welcomes New C.O."
Hey, who's got the old humor article about Gore being pursued by a pack of wild snowmobiles?
January 24, 2007 Fearmongering Walter E. Williams, Ph.D. Political commentator Henry Louis Mencken (1880-1956) warned that "The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed -- and hence clamorous to be led to safety -- by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary." The Weather Channel has taken up that task with its series "It Could Happen Tomorrow." The Weather Channel started its "It Could Happen Tomorrow" series in January 2006. The program includes episodes where a tornado destroys Dallas, a tsunami destroys the Pacific Northwest, Mount Rainier erupts and destroys nearby towns, and San Diego is devastated by wildfires. They omitted a program showing a meteor striking my house, for it, too, could happen tomorrow. Of course, any one of these events could happen tomorrow, but I'm reminded of a passage in Shakespeare's "Macbeth," where after Macbeth listens to the predictions of the witches, Banquo warns him that "Oftentimes, to win us to our harm, the instruments of darkness tell us truths, win us with honest trifles, to betray us in deepest consequence." That is, gain our confidence with trifle truths to set us up for the big lie. The big lie, conceived by the Weather Channel in cahoots with environmental extremists, is to get us in a tizzy over global warming, and they're vicious about it. Dr. Heidi Cullen, the Weather Channel's climatologist, hosts a weekly program called "The Climate Code." Dr. Cullen advocates that the American Meteorological Society (AMS) strip their seal of approval from any TV weatherman expressing skepticism about the predictions of manmade global warming, according to a report by Marc Morano, communications director for the U.S. Senate Committee on Environment & Public Works. Dr. Cullen has had a lot of help in demonizing skeptics of catastrophic manmade global warming. Scott Pelley, CBS News "60 Minutes" correspondent, compared skeptics of global warming to "Holocaust deniers," and former Vice President Al Gore calls skeptics "global warming deniers." But it gets worse. Mr. Morano reports that on one of Dr. Cullen's shows, she featured columnist Dave Roberts, who, in his Sept. 19, 2006, online publication, said, "When we've finally gotten serious about global warming, when the impacts are really hitting us and we're in a full worldwide scramble to minimize the damage, we should have war crimes trials for these bastards -- some sort of climate Nuremberg." (See the Morano report at: http://epw.senate.gov/fact.cfm?party=rep&id=264568.) He didn't say whether the death penalty should be administered to those found guilty of global warming denial. The environmental extremists' true agenda has little or nothing to do with climate change. Their true agenda is to find a means to control our lives. The kind of repressive human control, not to mention government-sanctioned mass murder, seen under communism has lost any measure of intellectual respectability. So people who want that kind of control must come up with a new name, and that new name is environmentalism. Last year, 60 prominent scientists signed a letter saying, "Observational evidence does not support today's computer climate models, so there is little reason to trust model predictions of the future. . . . Significant [scientific] advances have been made since the [Kyoto] protocol was created, many of which are taking us away from a concern about increasing greenhouse gases. If, back in the mid-1990s, we knew what we know today about climate, Kyoto would almost certainly not exist, because we would have concluded it was not necessary." They added, "It was only 30 years ago that many of today's global-warming alarmists were telling us that the world was in the midst of a global-cooling catastrophe. But the science continued to evolve, and still does, even though so many choose to ignore it when it does not fit with predetermined political agendas." These scientists have probably won The Weather Channel's ire and might be headed toward a Nuremberg-type trial. |
(Please FReepmail if you want on, or off, this list. I certainly have no desire to increase anyones stress-level. Thanks!!!)
Hey Seadog how are you??
I know this is a joke, but it will some day appear in a website for koolaid drinkers alongside stories about how our gummint staged the 9/11 attacks.
Incoherent Truth!
Pray for W and Our Troops
LOLOL!
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