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Kim Jong-Il Sorry for Nuke Test, Molested as Child
ScrappleFace ^
| Scott Ott
Posted on 10/20/2006 6:33:03 AM PDT by Sub-Driver
by Scott Ott
(2006-10-21) — North Korean President Kim Jong-Il today reportedly told Chinese diplomats that he regrets his government’s recent detonation of a nuclear device, and he revealed that he had been molested as a child.
“President Kim is sorry, and he takes full responsibility for the atomic bomb test,” said an unnamed Chinese source, “but in the spirit of transparency and vulnerability, he wants people to know about the childhood molestation incident.”
The North Korean leader has reportedly checked himself into a rehab center to “heal his inner child and boost his self-esteem,” but a spokesman said he is not ashamed to come out of the closet as a fascist dictator.
“A lot people are going to trot out the old myths that fascist dictators are dangerous to society,” said the spokesman. “But short of a few isolated genocides and unprovoked invasions, there’s little evidence to substantiate that claim. It’s time to move past recriminations over the nuclear test, and let bygones be bygones.”
TOPICS: Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS: humor; jungil; kimjongil; nkorea; northkorea; scrappleface
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To: Sub-Driver
2
posted on
10/20/2006 6:33:32 AM PDT
by
veronica
(http://www.freerepublic.com/~starcmc/)
To: Sub-Driver
Ahh.....a little scrapple for breakfast this a.m.
3
posted on
10/20/2006 6:34:28 AM PDT
by
Joe 6-pack
(Que me amat, amet et canem meum)
To: Sub-Driver
He was drunk when he conducted the test.
4
posted on
10/20/2006 6:34:43 AM PDT
by
SlowBoat407
(A living insult to islam since 1959)
To: Sub-Driver
LoL. I just laughed at the headline. Haven't even read it yet.
5
posted on
10/20/2006 6:34:47 AM PDT
by
nuconvert
([there's a lot of bad people in the pistachio business] (...but his head is so tiny...))
To: Sub-Driver
But, was he an alchoholic?
To: Sub-Driver
LOL - who needs to read the article? The headline was enough to make me snort my coffee! That Scrappleface - what a treasure.
7
posted on
10/20/2006 6:38:51 AM PDT
by
gramho12
To: Sub-Driver
"And, coming up next, KJIll outs Priest who molested him."
8
posted on
10/20/2006 6:39:45 AM PDT
by
SnarlinCubBear
(There is none righteous - NO not one.)
To: Sub-Driver
LOL!!!
Maybe NOW the MSM will cover this issue.
9
posted on
10/20/2006 6:39:45 AM PDT
by
kidd
To: Sub-Driver
The Japanese would call this:
SENRYAKUTEKI NA SHAZAI
or, "Tactical Apology". Of course it is not sincere, it is the stroke and hit, stroke and hit approach they are doing, alternating between being nasty guys and nice guys, in order to drive regional geopolitical wedges. Kim is a master of this and has done it with his father for forty years.
It is designed to elicit Chinese and South Korean pressure on US and Japan, as evidence Kim Jong il can be 'dealt with' in lieu of more 'severe' measures.
It has already been done this morning in Asia.
Then, next step, the US and Japan reject it, and then North Korea proceeds to drive the wedges deeper, saying "see, the imperialist agressors have no frexibirity!"--appealing to the appeasement factions of China and ROK government and populace.
10
posted on
10/20/2006 6:39:49 AM PDT
by
AmericanInTokyo
(..is an American allright, but is not in Japan, folks. Thanks for letting me keep the moniker.)
To: Sub-Driver
He really is very, very sorry, he regrets doing it for sure now, and if we give him everything he wants he'll never do it again. I believe him.
11
posted on
10/20/2006 6:41:56 AM PDT
by
Realism
(Some believe that the facts-of-life are open to debate.....)
To: Sub-Driver
I'm still waiting for him to come out, New Jersey style, and say, "My truth is that I am a gay tyrant."
12
posted on
10/20/2006 6:46:07 AM PDT
by
Steel Wolf
(As Ibn Warraq said, "There are moderate Muslims but there is no moderate Islam.")
To: Sub-Driver
I heard about that, apparently it took place when he was an alter boy
To: Sub-Driver
Well, it made me laugh anyways!!
14
posted on
10/20/2006 6:47:16 AM PDT
by
Sacajaweau
(God Bless Our Troops!!)
To: Sub-Driver
Actually he molested himself, and continues to this day!
15
posted on
10/20/2006 6:48:46 AM PDT
by
junebug58
(An Arkansas republican (one of the few))
To: Sub-Driver
He's also very, very ronery.
Did I mention he's a huge fan of Arrec Barrrwin?
16
posted on
10/20/2006 6:53:16 AM PDT
by
rock_lobsta
(Offending liberals since 1993)
To: Sub-Driver
To: Sub-Driver
And then there was that time in the sauna with Mark Foley...
18
posted on
10/20/2006 7:00:57 AM PDT
by
socal_parrot
(Chicks dig me.)
To: Sub-Driver
I think the NYT might actually get fooled and print this...
19
posted on
10/20/2006 7:02:33 AM PDT
by
NewLand
(Always Remember September 11, 2001)
To: junebug58
Actually he molested himself, and continues to this day! Did somebody here suggest it to him?
20
posted on
10/20/2006 7:09:37 AM PDT
by
thulldud
("Para inglés, oprima el dos.")
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