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FReeper Canteen~What Makes You Laugh?~July 28, 2005~
July 27, 2005 | bentfeather

Posted on 07/27/2005 7:36:35 PM PDT by Soaring Feather


For the freedom you enjoyed yesterday...
Thank the Veterans who served in The United States Armed Forces.

Looking forward to tomorrow's freedom?
Support The United States Armed Forces Today!

Good morning TROOPS!!
What makes you laugh??
Post your funny cartoons, jokes, anything you enjoy!


This one always cracks me up!


You Might Be A Soldier If..


Silly cartoon characters??

What tickles your funny bone??
A good joke, funny cartoons, a practical joker?




Computer humor?


"Why We Love Kids"



I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat, "Mom! That lady isn't wearing a seat belt!"


2. HONESTY

My son Zachary, 4, came screaming out of the bathroom to tell me he'd dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. So I fished it out and threw it in the garbage. Zachary stood there thinking for a moment, then ran to my bathroom and came out with my toothbrush. He held it up and said with a charming little smile, "We better throw this one out too then, cause it fell in the toilet a few days ago."

3. OPINIONS


On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a note from his mother. The note read, "The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents."

4. KETCHUP

A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the jar. During her struggle the phone rang, so she asked her 4-year-old daughter to answer the phone. "It's the minister, Mommy," the child said. Then she added, "Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now. She's hitting the bottle."

5. MORE NUDITY

A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, "What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a little boy before?"

6. POLICE # 1

While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, I was interrupted by a little girl about 6 years old. Looking up and down at my uniform, she asked, "Are you a cop?" "Yes," I answered and continued writing the report. "My mother said if I ever needed help, I should ask the police. Is that right?" "Yes, that's right," I told her. "Well, then," she said as she extended her foot toward me, "would you please tie my shoe?"

7. POLICE # 2

It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of the station. As I gathered my equipment, my K-9 partner, Jake, was barking, and I saw a little boy staring in at me. "Is that a dog you got back there?" he asked. "It sure is," I replied. Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the van. Finally he said, "What'd he do?"

8. ELDERLY

While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs. One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, "The tooth fairy will never believe this!"

9. DRESS-UP

A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, "Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit." "And why not, darling?" "You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning."

10. DEATH

While walking along the sidewalk in front of his church, our minister heard the intoning of a prayer that nearly made his collar wilt. Apparently his 5-year-old son and his playmates had found a dead robin. Feeling that proper burial should be performed, they had secured a small box and cotton batting, then dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased. The minister's son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers and with sonorous dignity intoned his version of what he thought his father always said: "Glory be unto the Faaaaaather, and unto the Sonnn, and into the hole he gooooes."

11. SCHOOL

A little girl had just finished her first week of school. "I'm just wasting my time," she said to her mother. "I can't read, I can't write and they won't let me talk."

12. BIBLE

A little boy opened the big family bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages. "Mama, look what I found," the boy called out. "What have you got there, dear?" With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, "I think it's Adam's underwear."


bentfeather



TOPICS: Culture/Society; Extended News; Free Republic
KEYWORDS: 954; airforce; army; bethylovestomkow6; coastguard; familysupport; fun; humor; information; marines; militarysupport; nationalguard; navy; piper; veterans
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To: bentfeather
He is a comedian who has a show on the Comedy Channel.

I may have misspelled his name.
61 posted on 07/27/2005 8:10:30 PM PDT by mmercier (know your place in the universe)
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To: bentfeather
What makes me laugh?

Blazing Saddles

Old Far Side cartoons

Anything that makes Howard Dean and Hillary Clinton cry.


62 posted on 07/27/2005 8:10:42 PM PDT by WestVirginiaRebel (Carnac: A siren, a baby and a liberal. Answer: Name three things that whine.)
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To: bentfeather; tomkow6

Either way. A burger or fruit. It's still inferior!

:)


63 posted on 07/27/2005 8:10:57 PM PDT by writer33 (Rush Limbaugh walks in the footsteps of giants: George Washington, Thomas Paine and Ronald Reagan.)
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To: mmercier

We are glad to have you join with us in support of our troops. Thank you for the links and all you have done.


64 posted on 07/27/2005 8:11:22 PM PDT by Soaring Feather (This Little Light of Mine)
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To: mmercier

He is a comedian who has a show on the Comedy Channel


LOL I didn't know that either. Duh, ms feather!!!


65 posted on 07/27/2005 8:12:34 PM PDT by Soaring Feather (This Little Light of Mine)
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To: tomkow6; bentfeather
A Z-BRA?????

What makes me laugh?

Tomkow6! LOL

66 posted on 07/27/2005 8:13:07 PM PDT by AZamericonnie (I AM an AMERICAN not because I live in America but because America lives in me!~Ray Cornelius~)
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To: writer33

Would you consider being a used Burka sales man??


67 posted on 07/27/2005 8:13:17 PM PDT by Soaring Feather (This Little Light of Mine)
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To: bentfeather
"The Three Stooges"
68 posted on 07/27/2005 8:13:24 PM PDT by mdittmar (May God watch over those who serve,and have served, to keep us free.)
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To: 68-69TonkinGulfYachtClub; tomkow6; uncleshag; pelikan; All

UPdate on that Interfax wire about Desert Russia army apparently he just carjack a car threw the driver out of the car according to witnesses

Also report off SKY news wire reporting that one of the bomber buddies telling Scotland Yard that dudes were plan go bomb Big Ben couldn't get the plan together


69 posted on 07/27/2005 8:13:32 PM PDT by SevenofNine (Not everybody in, it for truth, justice, and the American way,"=Det Lennie Briscoe)
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To: laurenmarlowe

Ah, Lauren. Can anyone ever look at those beautiful faces and their hearts not swell with pride at our awesome troops! Thank God for them; and God protect them and bring them home safely!

I look forward to these pictures every night, Lauren. Thank you! If one Mom or Dad sees their son or daughter here, it will be worth it!


70 posted on 07/27/2005 8:13:38 PM PDT by luvie (God bless America and God bless and protect our troops!!)
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To: WestVirginiaRebel

Anything that makes Howard Dean and Hillary Clinton cry.





ROTFLOL


71 posted on 07/27/2005 8:13:53 PM PDT by Soaring Feather (This Little Light of Mine)
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To: bentfeather

What makes me laugh?

Any of the Classic TV comedies from Andy Griffith to Seinfeld. For example Hogan's Heroes still make me bust a gut and Gilligan provides good, stupid fun and Green Acres is just sublime.

Practically any British comedy. Some of my favourites are Black Adder, Good Neighbours, Monty Python, and 'Allo, 'Allo.

Martin and Lewis Movies (singly or together), Abbot and Costello, The Three Stooges, The Bowery Boys, Hope and Crosby Movies, Mel Brooks movies, etc.

Music: Spike Jones, Wierd Al, Ray Stevens, etc.


72 posted on 07/27/2005 8:13:56 PM PDT by Army Air Corps (Four fried chickens and a coke)
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To: tomkow6
Warning; Not PC!

What do you call nice Catholic girls who practice the Rhythm Method?

73 posted on 07/27/2005 8:14:53 PM PDT by BIGLOOK (I once opposed keelhauling but recently have come to my senses.)
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To: bentfeather

You're welcome!

:o)


74 posted on 07/27/2005 8:15:22 PM PDT by luvie (God bless America and God bless and protect our troops!!)
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To: laurenmarlowe

Thank you for the pictures of our troops at work.


God keek them safe.


75 posted on 07/27/2005 8:15:32 PM PDT by Soaring Feather (This Little Light of Mine)
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To: LUV W
Good Evening Luv...Thanks
I love airplanes too.

Just a few recycled repeat makeovers.
76 posted on 07/27/2005 8:15:57 PM PDT by Smartass (Si vis pacem, para bellum - Por el dedo de Dios se escribió)
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To: mmercier; tomkow6; All

I like Dave Chappelle show and this new one called Mind of Mecida

My fav episode is Rick James episode

F**** YOU CHARLEY MURPHY
Cocaine is hellva of drug

Breaking news off Tass news wire report witneses are claim they saw explosion at some Russia bear on North Cascusus border at this hour

DAMNNNN


77 posted on 07/27/2005 8:16:19 PM PDT by SevenofNine (Not everybody in, it for truth, justice, and the American way,"=Det Lennie Briscoe)
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To: The Mayor

Hi Mayor. Thank you for today's inspirational message. It's much needed in these trying times.


78 posted on 07/27/2005 8:16:45 PM PDT by Soaring Feather (This Little Light of Mine)
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To: WestVirginiaRebel
Blazing Saddles

Don't get me started. My wife gets annoyed when I start reciting lines from that one... or "The Holy Grail"...

79 posted on 07/27/2005 8:17:01 PM PDT by cspackler (There are 10 kinds of people in this world, those who understand binary and those who don't.)
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To: bentfeather
OK, but just this time:

A group of Americans were traveling by tour bus through Holland. As they stopped at a cheese farm, a young guide led them through the process of cheese making, explaining that goats milk was used. She showed the group a lively hillside where many goats were grazing.

"These" she explained "are the older goats put out to pasture when they no longer produce." She then asked, "What do you do in America with your old goats?"

A spry old gentleman answered: "They send us on tours, and let us live in Florida.

And now...

.........FRegards
80 posted on 07/27/2005 8:17:36 PM PDT by gonzo (My eyes always water-up when I'm having sex. Must be that damned pepper-spray those broads use...)
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