Posted on 03/17/2005 2:15:19 PM PST by 4mycountry
Didn't this scam go around FR a few times? :) Happy St. Patty's.
Some advice needed for the leprechaun!
An Irish Mothers letter to her son
Dear Son
Just a few lines to let you know that I am still alive. I am writing this letter very slowly because I know you don't read too fast.
You won't know the house when you come here... we moved.
Your father has a new job with several hundred people under him. He cuts the lawn at the cemetery.
Your sister finally had her baby this morning. I don't know if it's a boy or a girl yet, so I don't know if you're an uncle or an aunt.
Your little brother came home from school yesterday crying. All the boys at his school got new suits, but we can't afford to buy him one. Instead we're going to buy him a new hat and just let him look out the window.
Uncle Dick drowned last week in a vat of whiskey at the distillery where he worked. Five men jumped in to try and save him, but he fought them off. They cremated his body and it burned for five days.
The neighbors next door have started to keep pigs. We just got wind of it this morning.
Your father took me to the doctor's the other day. The doctor put a small tube in my mouth and told me not to open it for ten minutes. Your father tried to buy it from him.
It only rained twice last week. Once for three days, then for four days. It was so windy that one of our chickens laid the same egg four times.
Well son, I will say good-bye for now. Your father says good-bye too.
Your mother,
Mom
Funny cartoon. Thanks for posting it.
St. Patrick's Day humor ping.
P.S. I was going to put $10.00 in the envelope for you, but I already sealed it.
I always wondered where the idea of dancing without your hands came from in Ireland. My guess it has something to do with Catholicism? Some Nun probably said "Keep your dirty sinful cotton pick en hands to yourself."
I heard that dancing was banned by some higher-ups way back when, so to disguise their dances, the Irish stopped using their arms in their dances. Apparently, this was not considered dancing, and thus could not be punishable as such. The tradition stuck long after the ban was lifted.
You forget the PS to your letter from the Irish mon to her son
PS
I meant to send you some money but the envelope was already sealed
sorry for the late reply. already posted by the time I finished.
I'm writing this letter slow because I know you can't read fast. We don't live where we did when you left home. Your dad read in the newspaper that most accidents happen within 20 miles from your home, so we moved.
I won't be able to send you the address because the last Arkansas family that lived here took the house numbers when they moved so that they wouldn't have to change their address.
This place is really nice. It even has a washing machine. I'm not sure it works so well though: last week I put a load in and pulled the chain and haven't seen them since.
The weather isn't bad here. It only rained twice last week; the first time for three days and the second time for four days.
About that coat you wanted me to send you, your Uncle Stanley said it would be too heavy to send in the mail with the buttons on, so we cut them off and put them in the pockets.
John locked his keys in the car yesterday. We were really worried because it took him two hours to get me and your father out.
Three of your friends went off a bridge in a pick-up truck. Ralph was driving. He rolled down the window and swam to safety. Your other two friends were in back. They drowned because they couldn't get the tailgate down.
There isn't much more news at this time. Nothing much has happened.
Love, Mom
I'm an Italian-American...let me just say it's a very long day! ;-)
What went on behind the school after classes...
A. Paddy O'Furniture
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