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FReeper Canteen ~ Camp Run-A-Muk! ~ Last Minute Gifts! ~ WooHoo! ~ Friday, December 17, 2004
My "VOICES", "kitty-katz", the Canteen Crew, and FRiends of the Canteen

Posted on 12/16/2004 7:58:15 PM PST by tomkow6


 

 

 
 
For the freedom you enjoyed yesterday... Thank the Veterans who served in The United States Armed Forces.
 
 
Looking forward to tomorrow's freedom? Support The United States Armed Forces Today!
 
 
 

...zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz....wake up!..............I got some MORE ideas.......why?......cause we gotta....huh?....I wanna sleep....no, GET UP!....we gonna go shoppin' AGAIN??.....
....YES!......I found alotta more neet gifts!....put a sock in it.....SHUT UP!... .....let's go shoppin'!....I WANNA SLEEP......get yer butt outta bed........wake me when it's over....

MORE

EXCITING Holiday GIFTS!

Welcome to  Camp RUN-A-MUK!

 
Where the Plan Of the Day is: Mirth...Merriment...and FUN!
Kick back! Relax! Tell a joke or two! Have a brew !

The BAR is OPEN!

We've got Eye candy...Mind candy...and Chicken soup for the soul!

Welcome to the ULTIMATE Shopping guide, part 2!

Lady Jag once said, "Love is a battlefield." And she couldn't be more right.

It's a tough world out there... between dating, and work, and dating, and errands, and dating... life can eat you alive. To compete in the real world, you gotta be equipped. 

And that's where the Miss Army Knife comes in.

It's a complete field artillery kit that looks like an innocent Swiss Army Knife. But it contains everything you need to survive rough terrain or rough dates.

 The Miss Army Knife opens every which way and includes the following indispensable tools...

flashlight..perfume bottle..keychain..bottle opener..needle & thread..screwdriver..safety pin..scissors..corkscrew..ruler..mirror..nail file..pen..pill box..tweezers  knife

 

It's brilliantly designed and built to last. The uses are endless -- use the knife to carve your lover's initials on a fence post. Use the nail file to file it away once you dump him. Use the perfume bottle to attract a replacement. Use the flashlight to show him the door when you dump him. About the only thing you can't do with it is use the needle & thread to mend your broken heart.

The Miss Army Knife makes a wonderful and thoughtful gift, which makes us wonder what it's doing at Camp Run-A-Muk!

MR. MOUTHYMOUTH
Finger Puppet


This rubber finger puppet is so darn repulsive we just had to sell it.

It's made of flesh-like rubber, with a huge teeth, a flexible tongue, and eyeballs that seem to dangle on strands of exposed flesh.

Because it's so flexible, you can make all sorts of disgusting faces with it. It's more fun that a barrel of mucus!

HALF HAMSTER / HALF GODZILLA
IT'S THE SINGING AND DANCING
HAMZILLA!

Run! Flee! Beat it!

It's Hamzilla!

Dancing Hamsters have reached a new level of stupidity with this marvel.

It's a little stuffed hamster dressed in a Godzilla costume. That's right... a hamster in a monster costume. It doesn't get much stupider than this.

But there's more... When you press his Godzilla foot, he sings and dances a pretty heavy rock song. You probably won't my "voices", but here are the lyrics...

He picks up a bus
And he throws it back down
As he wades through the buildings
Toward the center of town.

Oh, no. They say he's got to go.
Hamzilla!
Oh, no. There goes Tokyo.
Hamzilla!


As he dances, the eyes on the Godzilla costume light up.  He wears a shirt that reads "I Love Tokyo." As a final touch, the ferocious Hamzilla waves a city bus in his right hand and a ripped-out phone booth in his left hand.

If you know what's good for you, you'll buy a Hamzilla. You don't want to make him mad.


It's a well-known fact that hamsters are the most punctual creatures in the animal kingdom. Before clocks and watches were invented, people used to strap hamsters on their wrists to tell the time of day. It was not uncommon to hear passersby say, "Look at the time -- It's half past hamster!" Switzerland became famous for watches -- not because they were brilliant engineers -- but because their indigenous hamsters were exceptionally accurate timekeepers. 

So you can see why Camp Run-A-Muk is so excited to offer this incredible Hamster Clock for your consideration. It's by far  the most remarkable clock we have ever seen.

The colorful Hamster Clock features a furry, mechanical hamster inside of a hamster exercise wheel. Once every minute, THE HAMSTER RUNS and the hamster wheel goes around one revolution. The wheel is connected to an intricate series of 12 gears -- So when the hamster wheel goes around, it makes the clock's minute hand move 1-minute forward.


But we've save the most astounding fact for last -- the entire clock is DRIVEN BY THE HAMSTER. The timing mechanism is INSIDE THE HAMSTER itself. Each minute, when it starts to run, it forces the wheel around, setting the clock in motion. 


It must have taken a lot of engineering to get everything exactly right, but the clock works perfectly. The only drawback is that when the clock starts spinning each minute, it is kind of noisy. But what can you expect -- you have a running hamster robot, 12 gears, and a spinning exercise wheel -- it's gonna make some noise. 

How does the word in the box make you feel? 

 LIBERAL 

If the very mention of liberals makes you scream in frustration and pull the hair out of your head, then this punching bag might save your sanity, if not your very life.


That's right, my conservative cronie. Stop banging your head against the wall. Relief is here. The John Kerry Punching Bag is ready and willing to absorb all your pent up righteous right-wing rage. 

The John Kerry Bop Bag stands a mighty 46 inches tall with a sand-filled base so he pops back up after you bop 'em. A politician has to be thick-skinned, the Kerry Bop Bag is made of durable vinyl. As a finishing touch,  Kerry sports a pair of 3-D Boxing Gloves that squeak when you slug them. 


Of course, my "voices" don't encourage any real violence against our capable candidates. That's what great about the bop bag, no one gets hurt, and you feel a whole lot better!

SINGIN' IN THE RAIN PUPPY


Some people are not bothered by anything. No matter how serious the problem, they always look at the bright side. And if they get stuck with lemons, they make lemonade. In some places, these people are known as optimists. Around here, they're known as annoying.

And we suppose this toy can be considered annoying as well. It's a little stuffed puppy who refuses to let a rain storm dampen his spirits. When you press his paw, "Singin' In The Rain" plays and the pooch swings his umbrella from side to side.


The Singin' In The Rain Puppy is nicely executed. The pup wears a full set of rain gear, complete with coat, hat, and galoshes. The song that plays goes on for a long time and, thought we don't think it's Gene Kelly, it's a pretty good imitation.


When you think about it, the Singin' In The Rain Puppy teaches all of us a valuable lesson: Whenever storm clouds try to rain on your parade, just lift your head and sing! And when the men in white come to take you away, just tell them the singing rain puppy told you to do it!

FREE, with the purchase a 1-year subscription to
BURKA OF THE MONTH CLUB!

It starts innocently enough... You find a little kitten on your doorstep and "rescue" it. Then, somehow, another cat comes along, and you take that one in, too. Then another. And another. Before long, you look in the mirror and... OH MY GOD!!! You're a Crazy Cat Lady!!!!


If this doesn't describe you, then you surely know someone who does fit this frightening scenario. 

The people who designed The Crazy Cat Lady Action Figure certainly must know such a person. Because this bizarre toy captures the Cat Lady Phenomenon to a "T"!

There she stands -- ratty bathrobe, checked pajama bottoms, headband, wild hair, and a fanatical look on her face. And she's surrounded by six cats that own her heart and soul.

The Crazy Cat Lady stands 5-1/4" tall and can be posed however you like.

Yes, you may be tempted to laugh at the Crazy Cat Lady. But, be warned, one day that Cat Lady may be yourself.

No cats, puppies, hamsters, or my "voices" were harmed in the creation of this opening!  Nor was Santa Claus!
Kerry got the crap beat out of him, but me or my "voices" had only a tiny bit to do with that.....

 


TOPICS: Business/Economy; Constitution/Conservatism; Crime/Corruption; Culture/Society; Foreign Affairs; Government; Miscellaneous; News/Current Events; Political Humor/Cartoons; Politics/Elections; US: Illinois; Unclassified
KEYWORDS: airforce; army; camp; canteen; christmas; coastguard; fun; gifts; humor; marines; military; music; navy; rocks; silliness; spots; supportthetroops; waffles
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To: Spotsy

Was that video not just darling??


381 posted on 12/17/2004 5:30:26 PM PST by Soaring Feather
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To: Lady Jag
I bought all of my gifts online, but I parked a mile from my house just to get in the mood.

LOL! Great one LJ.

I got all of my shopping done in one day. It was far too easy.

382 posted on 12/17/2004 5:33:50 PM PST by Spotsy (*-*-* Merry Christmas *-*-*)
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To: Spotsy
I am done shopping! YEAH! Merry Christmas Spotsy!
383 posted on 12/17/2004 5:37:10 PM PST by Diva Betsy Ross (I am not NOT PC.. And Proud of it!: Merry Christmas! Happy Hanukkah!)
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To: bentfeather

The White House should to do monthly Barney movies and C-SPAN should dedicate a tv channel to the Barney cam. :^)


384 posted on 12/17/2004 5:37:13 PM PST by Spotsy (*-*-* Merry Christmas *-*-*)
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To: Spotsy

Here, here!! I love Barney!!!


385 posted on 12/17/2004 5:38:52 PM PST by Soaring Feather
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To: Diva Betsy Ross

Merry Christmas Betsy!
High five for being done shopping.
I'll be at Mailboxes Etc bright and early tomorrow morning.

Do both of your boys still believe in Santa?
I have to confess that I believed for many years,
despite my older brother's numerous attempts to ruin my parents' fun in playing the part.


386 posted on 12/17/2004 5:41:31 PM PST by Spotsy (*-*-* Merry Christmas *-*-*)
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To: beachn4fun; HiJinx
Wish I may, Wish I might, Find Mel Gibson in my stocking tonight.

WooHoo!

My father sent me this BBC story and said that he is waiting for his "last gift": An 82-year-old Chinese Nobel physicist plans to marry a 28-year-old graduate student, whom he has described as his "last gift" from God.

387 posted on 12/17/2004 5:48:14 PM PST by Spotsy (*-*-* Merry Christmas *-*-*)
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To: All; Inyokern
ATTENTION EVERYONE!

Thanks... I wanted to bring your attention to a thread here at FR which is in honor of an American Hero who has passed. He was 81, and you can read all about him here:

LENNY HAS PASSED

Here is a post from his son in law:

Thank you to all who responded.
I was going through Lenny's mementos last night and I found an old yellowed piece of paper entiltled "Battle Honors." Some of you may be interested in reading this:

Headquarters
NINTH AIR FORCE

AP(O 696???), U. S. Army
19 January 1945

BATTLE HONORS

1. Under the provisions of Section IV, Circular 333, WD, 1943, the following named unit of the Ninth Air Force is cited for outstanding performance of duty in action against the enemy. The citation reads as follows:

“The 10th Photographic Reconnaissance Group. For extraordinary performance of duty in action against the enemy from 6 May to 20 May 1944. The 10th Photographic Reconnaissance Group was charged with the heavy responsibility of furnishing vitally important photographs of the beaches on the continent upon which the Allied forces subsequently landed on 6 June 1944. In order to insure that the requisite photographs were of such a quality and scale that beach and shore defenses could be studied minutely for the briefing and training of assault troops it was necessary that the extremely low level oblique photographs be obtained at minimum altitude. Employing specially modified equipment installed in unarmed P-38 type aircraft, the intrepid pilots of the 10th Photographic Reconnaissance Group gallantly undertook the most hazardous missions. Flying unarmed and unescorted and at altitude as low as twenty-five feet, they fearlessly piloted their aircraft over the difficult photographic runs in the face of intense fire from some of the strongest anti-aircraft installations in Western Europe. Despite the great difficulties and dangers involved in the execution of these missions of the highest priority, the 10th Photographic Reconnaissance Group was successful in obtaining excellent photographs of coastal defenses from Blankenberghe to Dunkerque and from La Touquet to St Vaast la Hougue. The extraordinary skill, fortitude, and gallant devotion to duty demonstrated by the airmen of the 10th Photographic Reconnaissance Group in the brilliant discharge of this exacting assignment reflects the highest credit upon the organization and are in keeping with the finest traditions of the Army Air Forces.”

By the command of Major General VANDENBERG

WW Millard
Colonel, GSC
C of S

78 posted on 12/17/2004 2:05:53 PM PST by Inyokern

From my family to yours ,Inyokern, Thank you.

388 posted on 12/17/2004 5:49:59 PM PST by Diva Betsy Ross (I am not NOT PC.. And Proud of it!: Merry Christmas! Happy Hanukkah!)
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To: bentfeather; Spotsy; Diva Betsy Ross; trussell

Hi! Remember me?


389 posted on 12/17/2004 5:51:25 PM PST by Colonel_Flagg ("For those of you watching in black and white, Spurs are in the all yellow."-John Motson, BBC)
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To: Kathy in Alaska; beachn4fun

Thank you Ma for the hot cocoa! Delicious! ((HUGS))

I hope you scolded Beachy for suggesting that one your children imbibe an adult beverage.

Shopping was a remarkable success! Tomorrow I ship.


390 posted on 12/17/2004 5:51:28 PM PST by Spotsy (*-*-* Merry Christmas *-*-*)
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To: Colonel_Flagg

Hey, you are that Colonel who lives on the tundra.
Good To see you!!
How are you? Enjoying the holiday season?
Hope you have some time away from the office.


391 posted on 12/17/2004 5:52:50 PM PST by Spotsy (*-*-* Merry Christmas *-*-*)
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To: Colonel_Flagg

Hi honey, boo!!


392 posted on 12/17/2004 5:57:46 PM PST by Soaring Feather
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To: darkwing104
PT burkas

The burkas hide a lot. No PT needed. LOL! The Duck needs an official countdown clock.

393 posted on 12/17/2004 5:58:27 PM PST by Spotsy (*-*-* Merry Christmas *-*-*)
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To: Spotsy

How are you, Spotsybelle? I am taking next week off - but working from home. This week has been horrible. So it's time for a little relaxation in the Canteen!


394 posted on 12/17/2004 6:12:57 PM PST by Colonel_Flagg ("For those of you watching in black and white, Spurs are in the all yellow."-John Motson, BBC)
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To: bentfeather

Woohoo! Hi, sweetie! How are you feeling?


395 posted on 12/17/2004 6:13:13 PM PST by Colonel_Flagg ("For those of you watching in black and white, Spurs are in the all yellow."-John Motson, BBC)
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To: Colonel_Flagg
FOR YOU COLONEL-Listen here!!

Heeheee!

396 posted on 12/17/2004 6:14:30 PM PST by Diva Betsy Ross (I am not NOT PC.. And Proud of it!: Merry Christmas! Happy Hanukkah!)
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To: Colonel_Flagg

Fantabulous honey!! And you?? How's the family??


397 posted on 12/17/2004 6:14:43 PM PST by Soaring Feather
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To: bentfeather

MINE!!!!


398 posted on 12/17/2004 6:16:46 PM PST by Soaring Feather
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To: bentfeather

MINE!!!!


399 posted on 12/17/2004 6:16:47 PM PST by Soaring Feather
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To: bentfeather

MINE!!!!


400 posted on 12/17/2004 6:16:47 PM PST by Soaring Feather
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