Posted on 08/03/2004 10:54:56 AM PDT by Pikamax
LOST FUMBLER If John Kerry loses Michigan, he will probably blame it on his joke writers, then Woody Hayes and the mighty Ohio State Buckeyes. But he only has himself to blame. He should have used that several-decade gap between his job in Vietnam and his job of running for president boning up on his knowledge of sports. The Prowler has documented several examples thus far, and over weekend Kerry really goofed up.
To get his Ohio rallies up and rolling, Kerry used a set of jokes to open his events. In Bowling Green, his shtick went something like this:
"If you elect me and my running mate, John Edwards, we are going to give you the courageous leadership you need. We'll take the tough positions, the courageous positions, the tough stands. But there's one tough position I will not take: I am not going to choose between the Falcons and the Rockets" -- this is a local reference to the well-known rivalry between Bowling Green University and the University of Toledo.
"I will say this," he added. "There is nothing better than Buckeye football, period!"
Kerry used this set piece several times in Ohio, to great effect, never mind the waffling with the generality of "Buckeye" football. Was he talking Ohio State University specifically? Or just football in the state in general? Only Kerry knows.
But then Kerry dug a huge hole for himself. On Sunday and into Monday, Kerry hit Michigan, where he attempted to use the same Ohio jokes. Clearly, the sports humor has to be taken out of his hands before he really embarrasses himself.
"I just came here from Bowling Green," Kerry told the crowd to subdued applause. "I was smart enough not to pick a choice between the Falcons and the, well, you know, all those other teams out there. I just go for Buckeye football, that's where I'm coming from."
At that point, before all the boos began raining down upon him, Kerry seemed to realize his error. In an attempt to silent the angry crowd of University of Michigan supporters, Kerry said, "But that was while I was in Ohio. I know I'm in the state of Michigan and you got a great big M and a powerhouse of a team." Then his face, presumably, the Botox permitting, turned Big Blue.
If it walks like a moron, throws balls like a moron, dresses like a moron, poses for pictures like a moron and talks like a moron.... Well I guess that means he's the perfect DEMOCRAT candidate for the President of the United States!
"In the past 7 days Kerry has gotten into more gaffes then I've seen in 40 years of watching national elections."
He and T Rex must have the top DNC rats in an absolute panic by now.
Sign me - former member of the Marching Illini (another Big 10 school)
Please, oh please, let the MI GOP get this into some local ads. The electorate knowing that the man can't take the time to learn "Wolverines" (heck, I'd have expected at least "Spartans" considering Mikey Moore's current ensemble) might cost him some Detroit union-type votes if we're lucky.
How many days of work can he go before needing a vacation, anyway?! No way he'll make the whole election campaign nonstop, much less handle his day job (you know, that whole "Senator" thing).
5 Legislative Days Left Until The AWB Expires
I'm certain there is a video, as there are dozens of news agencies covering Kerry's every move.
However, we're about as likely to see this clip as we are in seeing the Whoopie curse-fest.
I was actually for the Buckeyes before I was against them!
John sKerry, walk-on to the Ohio State Buckeyes training camp, gets bumped from the team for flubbing a pass.
Of all states to make this mistake in. The Michigan/Ohio State rivalry is perhaps the bitterest in all of college football!
This person is a worm! And his wife is a crow!
Whether your football cry is GO BLUE or GO BUCKS, it's easy to see that Kerry is engaging in naked pandering: Whatever the current audience wants to hear. No one buys it, not even Democrats.
"Folks, it's really great to be here in Oklahoma. And let me be the first to say 'hook 'em horns!'"
If this was PRESIDENT BUSH, the liberal media would show
it on tape over and over and over to be sure Leno and
Letterman had it for tonight's jokes.
I rooted for Ohio State until I rooted against them for Michigan.
Mr. Kerry since you are such a football fan, who are you planning to root for in the Michigan-Ohio State matchup this fall? Oh heck, why don't you pick your favorite in all the Big Ten games, that will help you get elected for sure and make all the Big Ten fans happy.
Also tell us how many home runs you think each team will get, and who will have the best goalie?
Maybe. Maybe not.
Hah. That's almost as good as "I actually voted for the 87 billion before I voted against it". It would be great if that recent statement was recorded. And if so, I wonder if President Bush can use this sound bite in a campaign ad?
What a bozo. It goes to prove he only says what he thinks the crowd wants to hear. He has no core values and has no direction. He also has no idea what he is doing or even where he is from one minute to the next.
This from the dork that crawls on his belly while deer hunting. I bet he takes his shoe off to catch a pass.
"Perhaps a favorite Great Lake yacht racer?"
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