[Mannaggia l'America]

For me...

You have many relatives named either Joe or Mary, and you have at least one brother named Joe
My name is Joe, my father's name is Joe, two of my uncle's are Joe, my cousin's name is Joe, my aunt's name is Mary, my cousin's name is Mary. Shall I go on?

You grew up in a small house, but you still had two kitchens. (One was in the basement)
My grandmother had a stove, fridge, and freezer in the basement. The stove was for baking pastry only.

When you were growing up, you had five cousins all living on the same street
Close, but not on the same street. Within a few blocks.

If someone in your family grows beyond 6’ 2”, it’s presumed that the mother had an affair
No affairs in my family. No one is even close to 6' tall.

Your grandfather had a fig tree
YES! I helped him cover it up every year.

When you were growing up, you ate Sunday dinner at 2:00 p.m., and on Thanksgiving, your family’s first course was Ravioli
Our Sunday "dinner" was at 12:00 PM, right after mass. The spaghetti and meatballs stayed warm on the stove all day after that for anyone who dropped by or got hungry later.

Your big family gatherings were held in your garage
No garage - they were held in the back yard, or at the Italian-American club across the street. My dad had his wedding reception in the back yard.

Your favorite movie is the “Godfather”
I got the trilogy on DVD for Christmas!

At least one person in your family does a great impression of Don Corleone
ME.

You’ve been hit with a spoon and/or you’ve been hit by a nun
Both.

For a short time while you were growing up, you wanted to be a priest or a nun
Not me, but my cousin (Joe!) did.

You fight over whether it's called "sauce" or "gravy"
It's sauce.

Your mom's meatballs are the best!
My grandmother's were the best. Mom's are OK and mine are pretty good.

[God luvs America]

Your mother's mustache is almost as thick as dad's!! (:

[Revolting cat!]

Sounds like fun, can I be Italian?

[Azzurri]

mannagia! that list sounds too close to home!

[yankeedame]

For a short time while you were growing up, you wanted to be a priest or a nun

Are you kidding? There have been times in my life where I would have gladly run off to a old-fashioned "Bells of St. Mary"-type nunnery.

[John Beresford Tipton]

"At least one person in your family does a great impression of Don Corleone"....

OR

At least one person in your family is Don Corleone

[notpoliticallycorewrecked]

I was adopted by an Italian family, complete with a Sons of Italy membership.

Therefore # 5, 9, 11, 16, 20, 21 and 22 apply.

Her wedding reception was on the back patio of her parent's home. The pool table was in the center of the patio with an out side fridge. Certain pool shots required you to open the fridge to take a shot.

[dennisw]

Covering up fig trees for the winter bump! Done by cutting the roots on one side, bending the tree down and covering the tree with burlap and earth.

[katnip]

You forgot the Anthonys (pronounced Ant-ney)!

[I still care]

24. You are greeted at the door when you visit with a meatball on a fork.

25. You are amazed, when you leave NY, that people will actually put tomato soup on their pasta and think it is sauce. It's frightening.

26. You have a garden and it has zucchini, tomatoes, and eggplant. In the front yard is a "hen and chicks" and there is at least one fig tree.

27. You know Christmas Eve as "fish night". This means at least 5 different courses of fish. In fact, if it's a holiday, you must have at LEAST six courses.

Give me time, I'll think of plenty more.

[JoeA]

DInner on Sunday at 2:00! The first time I took my future wife (now ex) to my mom's for dinner she was treated to the typical Italian-American dinner. Being non-Italian, it was all new to her and became a story told many times after as her initiaion into the ways of Italians in Brooklyn.

First the antipasta was served. Slices of salami, mozzarella, olives, marinated peppers.

Next came the cheese ravioli, with meatballs, sausage and of course a rich red GRAVY, covered by romano cheese. Alongside was a salad, and a generous loaf of garlic bread.

Then the main course, a braciole, a rolled and seasoned steak.

After this, we went for dessert, across the hall to a neighbor's apartment, for espresso and cheescake. The espresso was of course properly served, with a rind of lemon alongside.

My intended feasted on the antipasta, and got as far as the ravioli, thinking that was the end of the meal.

A good Sunday meal took at least an hour or two, and was punctuated by visits by with neighbors and family. What a time, and a way of life. I miss it.

[JoeA]

You Know You're Italian If...

28. You know what a pork store is.

29. You knew what capuccino was before you ever heard of Starbuck's.

30. You knew someone who was "connected".

31. When you saw the "Godfather", you wondered why you weren't in the family movie.

[aristeides]

I got a cold a couple of weeks ago, so I retreated to my store of canned soups. When I ran out of the cans I had stored of Progresso Pasta Fagioli, I started looking in stores for replacements. Nowhere could I find any cans of Pasta Fagioli, Progresso or any other brand. Not in supermarkets, not in any of the Italian delis here in the D.C. area where I looked. Have they stopped making it? Am I going to have to learn how to cook pasta fagioli for myself, or is there anywhere I can go to get it in cans?

[Incorrigible]

You Know You're Italian If...

32. Your spouse is Irish

[HoustonCurmudgeon]

We had one Italian in the family around 1250 and another in the early 1800's but more than 5 of these apply to me so I guess I'm Italian!

[JoeA]

33. Your favorite comedian is Pat Cooper, (Bada-bing!)

[CatoRenasci]

1. Some Joe's, the only Mary was a WASP grandmother.
2. House was of reasonable size, one kitchen.
3. No cousins within 25 miles.
4. Growing up we knew wine came in all sorts and varieties, made at family-owned wineries, and was bottled best in 4/5 quart bottles sealed with new corks.
5. Half the men in the family are over 6', many have blue eys, some are blond (especially those who served in the Alpini).
6. Small wedding.
7. Grandfather lived in the city, a great uncle had a fig orchard.
8. Three cousins had red Ferraris. Grandfather preferred Packards. Father had a Stutz in college.
9. Sunday dinner varied, often starting at 8pm. Thanksgiving?: Pasta was never a first course. Typically antipasto was first, then clear soup, sometimes hearty soup next, then fish, then fowl, then joint, salad, fruit and cheese with port, then sweet deserts and coffee, then brandy and cigars for the men, more sweets and liquers for the ladies.
11. Preferred Fellini. liked Toscanini as a conductor. various opera singers.
12. Who is Connie Francis?
13. No
14. No.
15. No
16. No
17. No
18. Yes (at last a hit! but we were there for the art...)
19. No.,br> 20. No
21. We don't fight. It's gravy to some, sauce to others.
22. No
23. I guess I can't be Italian.

[jellybean]

Italian ping!!

[carlo3b]

You Know You're Italian If...

Fogetaboutit..

At least one kid in the family had to bring his/her accordian to a holiday dinner and played "Lady of Spain"

You bought at least one Christmas present out of the trunk of a car in an alley.

Someone in you family owed a fortune in "juice", that had nothing to do with fruit.

It wasn't Sunday if you didn't smell the gravy cooking while you were still in bed!

If you used a closeline in the house to dry Pasta before a holiday.

You knew only one kid that had blue eyes, and you had a crush on his sister.

If you had a cousin that had a hairline that almost touched his/her eyebrows.

You had at least 3 women in the family that only wore Black.

If you really miss the smell of sausage at a wedding...Developing.. :)

[Captainpaintball]

Do I even need to inform you about Don Giovanni's Italian House Party (Brought to you by Maggio cheese, of course) on 1210 AM every Saturday evening?

[cartoonistx]

Your list should include someone making ravioli on the bed!