Posted on 03/13/2026 1:01:23 PM PDT by simpson96
Dear Annie: My son is getting married in July, and I’m dreading it. The woman he plans to marry is, in my view, a lying, conniving, lazy master manipulator who has worn him down so much he barely seems to care about life anymore. He doesn’t see it, but my husband and I do. He thinks she hung the moon.
She’s a complete narcissist. She’s on her phone every waking minute, and doesn’t cook, clean or care for their daughter. My son works all day, then takes care of their home and my granddaughter while she makes excuses. She believes putting on “Ms. Rachel” and sitting in the same room scrolling TikTok counts as parenting. There is little to no interaction.
She hasn’t done anything to improve their situation; if anything, life seems harder because of how she conducts herself. She’s been “working on” getting her driver’s license for four years. When things go wrong, it’s always someone else’s fault, and she casts herself as the hero in every story. Every conversation somehow circles back to her.
I truly believe he’s making the biggest mistake of his life by marrying her. She won’t change because he, and everyone else, caters to her. What can we do? -- Dreading the Wedding
Dear Dreading the Wedding: It’s painful to watch someone you love make choices you wouldn’t make yourself. Even so, this is your son’s life, and if he’s set on marrying this woman, pressure won’t change that.
Share your concerns once, calmly and respectfully. Focus on what you’ve observed and how it affects him and your granddaughter, not on attacking her character. Then step back. If you’re right and things unravel, you want him to feel safe coming to you, not defensive or embarrassed.
Sometimes the best way to help is to keep the door open and your judgment quiet. You may not be able to stop this wedding, but you can make sure your son and granddaughter always have you in their corner.
Good point. Also, we would be remiss if we didn't consider the possibility that it is actually the Mama Bear author of the letter who is the crazy one.
Very true. However, given that his wife actually wrote in to Dear Abby for advice, there's at least a 50% chance that she's a nutbag. In which case, he may just be keeping a low profile because he knows there's no shutting her down when she"s on the warpath.
Mom! STFU. He’s an adult and it’s his business. And don’t even think of “I told you so” when the divorce happens.
Yup—that is my read as well.
Dad may think the bride to be is wonderful.
Lol.
Setting aside the obvious (that the marriage is doomed by M-I-L problems before it starts), here is my entry in the Dear Abbie derby.
Tell the son you recognize that he is an adult and gets to run his own life. Suggest that it would allay your concerns if he would join the bride in a pre-nuptial agreement that in case of divorce, husband and wife each get whatever property, money, investments, etc. he/she brought into the marriage, but no alimony or spousal support. If the wife requests the divorce, the husband gets custody of their child.
It’s like my mother wrote this.
None of these people exist.
You would not like it but if you want you are free to convert and go live somewhere else.
Bye-bye.
Probably both. Leftism and malignant narcissism go hand in hand.
An acquaintance of mine recently tied the knot with someone around 25 years younger than him. All of us who've been around them can see that she's doing it for his cash and bling. Everyone but him sees that she's playing him. But on the flip side, he's into having a young chick to parade around with, so it's sort of a quid pro quo.
The whole show's pretty seedy. But hey, he's a grown man so while having a few beers with him before he married her all I said to him was, "Be very careful, man. Hope you'll put together a very tight prenup to protect yourself if things go south," and left it at that. All he said back was, Yeah man, I know."
There's no fool like an old fool. . .
I've known bright, beautiful people to marry jackasses and ultimately regret it. Some acknowledge it later in life. Some express regrets. But when when someone's determined to marry someone, he/she will not be persuaded otherwise.
I know. I've tried.
My advice is, postpone the wedding and keep enjoying the sex.....
Not a good idea to "hang a moon". That kind of behavior can come back and hit you in the behind.
When I was in college I was dating a young women and we had plans to marry.
My mother’s version of events was she was awful and I was making a terrible mistake.
My father’s version of events was she was hot and super nice, well done.
(Eventually we broke up so it became academic.)
Get some Nads and stand your ground
Bkmk
Wow, this place is becoming Facebook. No wonder no one wants to donate. Between the uke trolls, the TDSers, and the fake conservatives there’s not much reason for this site to exist anymore.
Were her pronouns they/them?
Since they already have a daughter together, why not make her an “honorable woman” and marry her? He’s on the financial hook for the kid already, so there’s no getting the bride to be out of his life.
“God’s rules are always best.”
Yeah, since when have the family courts cared or supported God’s rules? The 1950s?
It’s been Marx’s rules since the ‘60s. From each according to their ability to each according to their need.
So, given the chance everyone sits on their ass and says “gimme yo shit, gimme yo shit”.
The Marxists broke marriage. It is just a legal contract with the government. The wife is their signatory agent and representative. As soon as she decides the government gives her the man’s house, half his assets, his kids, child support and a salary for cheating on the husband.
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