Posted on 11/22/2025 4:04:32 PM PST by E. Pluribus Unum
LANSING, MI — Local mom Janet Fields has continued her decades-long tradition of making cranberry sauce for no one to eat.
Despite no one remotely considering touching the cranberry dish for the past thirty years of Thanksgiving dinner, Fields remains undeterred.
"Ope! Can't forget the cranberry sauce," said Fields as she began the feast preparations. "Wouldn't be Thanksgiving without cranberry sauce, you know. I love the color it adds to the table, it's so bright and festive. Mm, that smell! You know, I don't actually care for cranberry sauce myself, but it's part of the tradition and it's always gone the next day. Did you know cranberries have flavonoids?"
According to sources, no one in the Fields family has ever eaten a cranberry willingly. "I still do not know what cranberry sauce is made of, and I don't want to know," said Mark Fields. "There is something unholy about fruit that takes the shape of an aluminum can. Yet, there is something weirdly comforting about knowing it will always be there."
At publishing time, Fields had also set out some white turkey meat in case anyone preferred white meat.
(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...
Sorry, but I love cranberries, and cranberry sauce.
Lucky you.
Thanksgiving was always most important in my family. Giving thanks, sharing fellowship and being grateful for a good year, good harvest and good hunting and fishing. It was a real thing growing up in the NE. The 0-degree freezer needed to be stocked to make it thru the long winter. There were several years when I was away at school that in spring my mother called and thanked me for stocking the freezer with so many fish fillets.
I think Thanksgiving is one of America’s most sacred and important holidays. We are all thankful and grateful to share our bounty with others.
I love home made cranberry sauce. Easy and delicious.
Ooooh yes!
Flip them halfway through.
Here’s a secret..cut up your turkey,2 breasts,2 wings,2 thighs,2 drumsticks...
.....thighs need longer,up to 185 or a little higher,breast’s are done at 155,..so put the thighs in first.
And I almost never put a bite of turkey in my mouth without adding some cranberry sauce for flavor and lubrication...
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