Posted on 08/08/2025 5:12:34 AM PDT by V_TWIN
TULSA, OK — Witnesses said local wife Danielle Matson perked up quickly after hearing the sound of her husband, Dave, plopping down on the couch, as it instantly reminded her of all the things she needed him to do for her.
While her husband had just finished mowing and weeding the yard after spending all day working at his day job, Danielle didn't remember all of the pressing tasks she needed him to complete until she heard his body make contact with the couch cushions.
"Oh! Dave!" she exclaimed. "Can you bring in the giant bag of flour I bought from Costco that's in the back of the van in the garage? I need it right now to make bread for dinner, and it's so heavy."
Dave reportedly sighed, savoring the two seconds he got to enjoy sitting on the couch before slowly standing up and heading out to the garage. "I felt my back make contact with the couch for a moment, and it felt nice," he said. "I'd like to try that again sometime... but maybe for longer."
Danielle thanked her husband for bringing her the bag of flour and paused, holding still to see if she could hear him sit down once again. "Dave... are you going to sit down? I could use some help with the dishes before I start dinner."
At publishing time, sources said Dave could be heard trying to "sneak" away to use the restroom before Danielle asked him how long he was planning on being gone, as the garbage needed to be taken out.
TRUTH!
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Some things hit waaaay too close to home!
I worked for a guy whose wife was like this. It was a small construction company and we were going to a job site about 45 miles from town. He got a call from his wife on the two-way, she said he forgot to take out the garbage. This task is simply taking a can of garbage from the home to the curb.
He dropped us off at the worksite, then quickly sped back to town to take out the garbage.
There was always something like this going on for us workers to be amused over.
Dave's not here man
A Marine told me this years ago:
“Always walk and act like you’ve got sh*t to do, and nobody fuc*s with you.”
It works, but not with a Wife. They’re immune.
Either he'll get what all men want, or she'll quit bugging him. It's called a win-win situation.
Weird how single women can take cans from their house to the curb, but married women can’t.
Your coworker suffered from an ailment.....it’s called being pu**y whipped.
Wait, what?
Q1. She did the shopping?
Q2. She bakes bread?
Q3. She thanked him?
Q4. She cooks?
If Danielle is going to be a real shrew, she needs to stop doing those things, and have Dave either do those things, or hire them out.
J/K.
And the sound of There’s Something She Wanted Him To Do should trigger an automatic “not now dear” and “please make me a sandwich”.
Possible “taking out the garbage” was code?
Not with this woman.
I’m not sure girls belong on this thread 😁
Heard that....still drinking my coffee this morning and hadn’t even had breakfast yet and my wife hits me with “You ARE going to weedeat the backyard today right?” 😏
Best post yet!🤣
LOL. On a related note, we have a young friend who just turned 40 who grunts or groans every time he gets up or sits down. We tease him that he is officially old because of it and he doesn’t take too kindly to the teasing.
Build a man cave, lock it, don’t answer calls from wife.
Which is why I keep a vivacious 31 year old woman on speed dial for various “maid” services.
One of the Bee guys must have got married.
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