Don F with the SCIENCE Dire Wolves!
Posted on 04/08/2025 2:33:40 PM PDT by dynachrome
Though the week began with exciting news of a scientific breakthrough in reviving a long-gone species of animal, the brand-new dire wolves were reported to be extinct once again after being used as test subjects in new experiments performed by Dr. Anthony Fauci.
Scientists at Colossal Biosciences held a somber press conference on Tuesday, only a day after their announcement that they had successfully brought back the extinct breed of wolves, to bring the unfortunate news to the public that Fauci's latest round of experiments had once again rendered the dire wolf extinct.
"In hindsight, we probably shouldn't have given him access to them," said Colossal Biosciences CEO Ben Lamm. "We were just so excited when the project was successful and we had these two new dire wolves, we didn't even stop to think about what Dr. Fauci would want to do with them. He just asked if he could take care of them for a few days because he was literally science incarnate. As it turns out, he has a really awful reputation for doing horrible things to animals. So, anyway… they're super extinct again."
(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...
This is dire.
Against Fauci the Dire Wolves were defenseless and helpless.
“he was literally science incarnate”
Well when one says things like “I am the science” expect to get relentlessly mocked.
Were they wearing masks, and maintaining 6 feet between them? I bet that’s what got ‘em.
The BEE got me again. Sounded completely believable considering Fauci and his evil ways.
Dire beagles?
Gotta love The Bee! Looks like Colossal Biosciences is now in dire straits.
Not regular extinct.
Ping. :D
Oh, Fauci, you sweet summer child...
Dire Beagles still do not have a hate-bone in their tiny little musical bodies, but they *do* have an instinct to chase after dire bunnies...
I know!!!
I’ve been hoping for years!!!
🐺🐺🐺🐺
To Fauci: Please, don’t murder me.........
Don F with the SCIENCE Dire Wolves!
The Grateful Dead… but of course! finally someone comes up with some kind of logical reason these people wanted to resurrect the Dire Wolf.
This topic was posted , thanks dynachrome.
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