Posted on 09/23/2024 4:43:07 AM PDT by RoosterRedux
Greg: First solo interview stinks like doggy doo. The video of the day comes from Pennsylvania. She did her first sitdown interview all by herself like a big girl. But when we talk about making prices affordable for people, what are the two specific things she has in mind for that?
Interviewer: When we talk about bringing down prices and making life more affordable for people, what are one or two specific things you have in mind for that?
Interviewee: I will start with this. I grew up a middle-class kid. My mother raised my sister and me. I grew up in the neighborhood with folks who were very proud of their mom, you know? And I was raised to believe and to know that all people deserve dignity. We as Americans have a beautiful character. We have ambitions and aspirations, but not everyone necessarily has access to the resources that can help them fulfill those dreams and ambitions. So, when I talk about food, a good opportunity economy, it is very much with the mind of investing in the ambitions and aspirations, and the incredible work ethic of the American people.
Greg: That meant nothing. But here is a rule of thumb: if a politician's answer to housing prices includes lawns, you will probably end up sleeping on one. Meanwhile, she introduced a new act at the Congressional Black Caucus dinner over the weekend. Watch.
Interviewee: Hello to all of my brothers and sisters! And to all of my HBC ICU brothers and sisters.
Greg: I have to hand it to her; she is the woman of 1,000 voices, and they are all annoying. Can you decipher what she said in that response about the economy and prices, Matt?
Matt: Not really. I like the accent she does because it is supposed to sound urban, I think, but it almost sounds like a plantation owner in the antebellum South, which I do not think is what she is going for at all. But for the rest of it, I do not think I am the first person to point that out, but I see myself in her when she gives answers because this is like when I was in eighth grade, trying to further out the word count in a book report.
Greg: Yes.
Matt: It is like she does not know what she is going to say when she is in the middle of a sentence. She does not know what the next sentence will be. So she tries to stretch out the sentence for as long as she can so it does not end, and she has to start a new one.
Greg: Exactly.
Matt: That is the process.
Greg: Sometimes I think, Adam, she is saying the things that the people who are coaching her tell her. Like, "Here is what you should say next." She will say, "And I am going to say next," and then actually say the thing, the actual directives.
Adam: I heard sometimes in the bedroom she has a teleprompter, which says, "Orgasm." Would that make the show?
Greg: Of course. You know how low the audience is.
Adam: But she is talking about hope and change, which describes my wallet. And it is like, were they better off four years ago? Yes, I was single. But look, voting for her after Biden is like going to the dentist to get rid of your hemorrhoids. That accent, she put on a thick Southern accent, and then she went to California and put on a fake Mexican accent. She went to Minnesota and married her brother. I should have stopped three jokes ago.
Greg: But they appreciate it.
Adam: Greg, can I? Can you stop having a standup comedian doing a whole set right after me? It makes me look boring by comparison. Go to somebody else and then...
Greg: Your movie is number 4. I can't make a homemade porno, so we are talking about it.
Greg: This... these people. Do you know this topic will make you smile. This was edited to make her look better about the garbage that she spouted?
Matt: "I grew up a middle-class kid." Is that not good enough of an answer?
Cat: It is for a presidential candidate. Also, lawns? Do people have lawns? She was like, "Okay, she said specifics, but she said she grew up a middle-class kid, and people care about their lawns." And she talks about the opportunity economy, but I am still really unclear on what that is.
Matt: Yes.
Matt: I think it is interesting because Biden set the bar in an interesting place for what is acceptable in an interview to say. But he is old. There was that excuse. I don't know with her and the excuses, but there were these follow-up questions like, "That was not what I asked you at all. I did not ask you if people in your neighborhood had lawns." That is very low on my list.
Greg: Yes. I really expected more from Brianne Taft, from Philadelphia Action News.
Matt: I would, if I were Brian Taft, I would be like, "This is my big moment."
Greg: Exactly. Brian Taft, you really dropped the ball on that one, from Action News. Don't you wish you worked at Action News?
Matt: You just want to be part of a news team. You want to break a story.
Greg: Exactly.
Matt: You break the stories like you are jogging. That is every promo. A couple of things come to mind. One of the things is when your setup is the punchline, which is World Bank, and I say to myself, "Probably played the beginning." But when you played the whole thing, it is so astoundingly inane, and then you wonder why these experts say, "I don't care about criticism. You will not sit down with anybody. You will not do an interview." And if you do sit down with somebody, I want the other guy, who is not allowed to have an opinion on anything, sitting next to you and being your running mate. This is really scary to me. I do not think that she has any idea what she would do if she were president. I can tell you exactly what Trump would do. You guys might not like it, but everybody in this room knows exactly what Trump would do. He will pick up where he left off. You know where he stands with his policy. He will offend some people and please some other people. When she gets to the Oval Office, there will be somebody else running the country that we have not met yet, and that should be a little bit scary.
Greg: It is. Good for you.
Who mowed the lawn?
Haitians.
Her thoroughly middle-class mom paid them in puppies and kittens.
Bold faced lie: Kamala grew up in the wealthiest suburb in all of Canada.
President “Bobby”: Mr. Gardner, do you agree with Ben, or do you think that we can stimulate growth through temporary incentives?
[Long pause]
Chance the Gardener: As long as the roots are not severed, all is well. And all will be well in the garden.
President “Bobby”: In the garden.
Chance the Gardener: Yes. In the garden, growth has it seasons. First comes spring and summer, but then we have fall and winter. And then we get spring and summer again.
President “Bobby”: Spring and summer.
Chance the Gardener: Yes.
President “Bobby”: Then fall and winter.
Chance the Gardener: Yes.
Benjamin Rand: I think what our insightful young friend is saying is that we welcome the inevitable seasons of nature, but we’re upset by the seasons of our economy.
Chance the Gardener: Yes! There will be growth in the spring!
Benjamin Rand: Hmm!
Chance the Gardener: Hmm!
President “Bobby”: Hm. Well, Mr. Gardner, I must admit that is one of the most refreshing and optimistic statements I’ve heard in a very, very long time.
[Benjamin Rand applauds]
President “Bobby”: I admire your good, solid sense. That’s precisely what we lack on Capitol Hill.
Lawns are easy on the knees
We have a robotic lawnmower and just yesterday thought to name it: Chance.
Harris’ ass is grass, and Trump is the lawnmower.
She sounds like she smokes grass.
Taxing lawns is good policy I suppose?
She sounds like she’s had a lobotomy.
What hey want is a national rain tax.
“She sounds like she smokes grass.”...
...and she only gets two joints out of a lid.
...and she only gets two joints out of a lid.
“I roll really big joints, man!”
LOL!
“Our judges roll big joints too!...”
Nice work, dfwgator. Yeah, we’re now living the Peter Sellers movie, Being There.
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