Posted on 07/04/2024 6:34:53 PM PDT by dynachrome
The president is missing! A source confirmed late Tuesday night that President Biden, apparently spooked by Independence Day fireworks, piddled on a rug before bolting in terror into the woods behind the White House.
The anonymous source said Jill forgot to lock Joe in his crate before the fireworks started, causing him to startle at the loud noise. "He started running in circles, then he peed all over the rug in the bedroom and made a break for it through an open kitchen door," the source said.
"Unfortunately, the President's son Hunter left the back gate open, as he was meeting with a pharmaceutical representative in the alley out back," the source added. "The President bolted off into the woods and hasn't been seen since!"
(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...
“At publishing time, the only thing they found was Vice President Kamala Harris in the woods with a large stockpile of spent fireworks.”
LOL, Bee hits a homerun. Take that, New York Times!
I thought Jill put one of those dog collars on him with the Unlimited Range Pet Tracker GPS in it.
Also he gets a shock if he tries to escape her control.
Put a thundercoat on the prick.
The on call pet psychic has been summoned to find him.
The source is the Bee, so of course this is NOT true. In the first place they apparently do NOT know there are NO woods behind the White House. Also the DC fireworks were scheduled to start a little more than a half hour ago. Just before this thread was posted. THe article says the report was confirmed on Tuesday, this is Thursday, and after a long search the President was not found. Nice joke, but absurdly untrue. Two days late and a dollar short.
C’mon man! That’s not the first time this has happened.
drew attention to myself laughing out loud
Iām sure the put a Tractive GPS on him
He’ll be caught. He’s bound to stop and hump someone’s leg.
Hahaha. My dogs are on the bed in my dark room. I can just imagine Biden crawling under the bed in the white hut pissing himself.
I’ll put it in ‘breaking’ next time.
;)
Nag, Nag, Nag...
Re: The on call pet psychic
Ha.
That’ll complete the scene at the White House.
Add a Biden Whisperer to figure out what Joe means and what Hunter is going to do next. Instead of an interpreter for the deaf there can be someone saying “You know, the thing” means the revised employment figures. “He didn’t mean he was a black woman himself as Vice President.” Lots of work.
“Unfortunately, the President’s son Hunter left the back gate open, as he was meeting with a pharmaceutical representative in the alley out back,” the source added.
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