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Want To Get Rich? Here Are 8 Things You Should Invest In As Soon As Possible
Babylon Bee ^ | February 5, 2024 | Staff

Posted on 02/07/2024 5:38:40 PM PST by Twotone

You may or may not be tired of living like just a regular, run-of-the-mill person, but in order to change your status, you need to be fabulously wealthy. What do you need to do to become fabulously wealthy? Get elected to the U.S. Congress. Unfortunately, that might not be a feasible option for many people, so you'll need to build your wealth some other way.

The Babylon Bee is here to help by providing you with the following list of soon-to-be hot commodities you should invest in now:

1. Razor wire: Between the need for it at the border now and the need everyone will have to put it around their houses soon, you'll make a fortune.

2. That one limited edition Trump NFT of him dressed as an astronaut: This will soon be one of the most sought-after digital properties in the world. Get it now while it's still only $399!

3. McRib Sandwiches: We've heard a rumor they will NOT be coming back this year. They'll be priceless.

4. Copies of movies with male characters in them: Hollywood is well on its way to eliminating male characters from existence, so copies of classic films will be all the rage.

5. Helmets: All those people buying Apple Vision goggles are going to need to protect themselves from head injuries somehow.

6. Gas-powered cars: Your '86 Ford F-150 will soon be worth millions.

7. Adult diapers: The president and U.S. Congress will soon blow through the world's current supply.

8. Guns: Lots of guns.


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; humor; satire

1 posted on 02/07/2024 5:38:40 PM PST by Twotone
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To: Twotone

9. Lots of ammo


2 posted on 02/07/2024 5:43:37 PM PST by FatherofFive (Islam only understands Death and Pain. Give it to them. )
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To: FatherofFive

You forgot stock in the bus companies. Texas is shipping illegals to NYC and Chicago. Chicago and NYC are shipping illegals to Californina. Florida is shipping them to NYC.
Several other states will soon be shipping them somewhere.


3 posted on 02/07/2024 5:50:04 PM PST by oldasrocks
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To: FatherofFive

Agreed. Lots of ammo. It’s actually a precious metal, worth more than gold or silver in hard times. It can be traded for almost anything such as food, gas, med supplies or whatever.

Now if things really get rough, what will have a higher trading value, that 500 dollar gold coin the size of a nickel or 50 rounds of 5.56?


4 posted on 02/07/2024 5:55:28 PM PST by redfreedom (Joseph Stalin: "It does not mater how anyone votes, how votes are counted is what matters.")
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To: redfreedom
Now if things really get rough, what will have a higher trading value, that 500 dollar gold coin the size of a nickel or 50 rounds of 5.56?

The people who advocate for gold and silver never stop to think through that one.

A bullet can defend you or provide food. A gold coin can do what exactly?

5 posted on 02/07/2024 6:02:49 PM PST by metmom (He who testifies to these things says, “Surely I am coming soon.” Amen. Come, Lord Jesus…)
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To: Twotone

Coffee.

Ever see what happens during a power outage??????

If someone ever wants to really bring this country to its knees., mess with the coffee shipments.


6 posted on 02/07/2024 6:04:10 PM PST by metmom (He who testifies to these things says, “Surely I am coming soon.” Amen. Come, Lord Jesus…)
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To: metmom

com’o mom,
don’t be that necessarily simplistic


7 posted on 02/07/2024 6:12:52 PM PST by A strike (Words can have gender, humans cannot.)
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To: metmom

Precious metals are useful during periods of high inflation. In a doomsday scenario, PMs are used for AFTER things have collapsed. When the world comes back, PMs can allow you to retain your economic health.

But during the decline and failure…food is better.

Everything has a purpose.


8 posted on 02/07/2024 6:33:05 PM PST by Vermont Lt (Don’t vote for anyone over 70 years old. Get rid of the geriatric politicians.)
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To: Twotone
Since we're well along towards the "South Africa Solution", perhaps investing in hot companies that do the same thing here, such as Electrified Fencing, Spiked Walls, Training dogs to kill, Security Companies, etc.


9 posted on 02/07/2024 7:10:19 PM PST by BobL (Trump gets my vote, even if I have to write him in; Millions of others will do the same)
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To: BobL

What is a rape gate? Google search led nowhere.


10 posted on 02/07/2024 8:35:03 PM PST by AlaskaErik (There are three kinds of rats: Rats, Damned Rats, and DemocRats.)
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To: AlaskaErik

A chastity belt?


11 posted on 02/08/2024 4:44:04 AM PST by Codeflier (Don't worry....be happy )
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To: redfreedom

If you use gold bullets, you’ll be really careful with your aim and shot placement and you’ll go dig it out of your target for perpetual reuse!


12 posted on 02/08/2024 5:46:47 AM PST by Theophilus (covfefe)
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To: AlaskaErik; Codeflier

“What is a rape gate? Google search led nowhere.”

Sorry guys, owed you an answer. It’s an fortified interior door inside a house that acts as a last-ditch defense against a home invasion, with the hope that security makes it there before the gate is breached.

Here’s an article from 20 years ago that mentions them.

https://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/world/city-of-fear/article20451561/


13 posted on 02/11/2024 6:14:40 AM PST by BobL (Trump gets my vote, even if I have to write him in; Millions of others will do the same)
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