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Santa Claus Conquers the Martians
IMDB ^ | 1964 | IMDB

Posted on 12/11/2023 11:37:50 AM PST by DallasBiff

The Martians kidnap Santa Claus because there is nobody on Mars to give their children presents.

(Excerpt) Read more at imdb.com ...


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; TV/Movies
KEYWORDS: santaclaus; worstchristmasmovie

Saw this in a movie theater, as a kid, and said to myself(WTF), this is bad, went to the concession stand to get more popcorn, and wait for the second feature.

1 posted on 12/11/2023 11:37:51 AM PST by DallasBiff
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To: DallasBiff

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QgcclbBmdEY


2 posted on 12/11/2023 11:39:43 AM PST by TomServo
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To: TomServo

You will love the polar bear.


3 posted on 12/11/2023 11:44:28 AM PST by caseinpoint (Don't get thickly involved in thin things.)
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To: DallasBiff

How much was admission?


4 posted on 12/11/2023 11:45:35 AM PST by Berlin_Freeper
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To: caseinpoint
You will love the polar bear.

Worst polar bear costume EVER!

5 posted on 12/11/2023 11:46:38 AM PST by fidelis (Ecce Crucem Domini! Fugite partes adversae! Vicit Leo de tribu Juda, Radix David! Alleluia!)
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To: Berlin_Freeper
How much was admission?

I think it was 50 cents, it was a double feature matinee.

6 posted on 12/11/2023 11:48:09 AM PST by DallasBiff (Apology not accepted.la is not the sharpest knife in the drawer)
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To: DallasBiff
Of course MST3K did a hilarious lampooning of this flick. We watch it every Christmas, along with the episode they did on the Mexican children's movie, Santa Claus.
7 posted on 12/11/2023 11:48:38 AM PST by fidelis (Ecce Crucem Domini! Fugite partes adversae! Vicit Leo de tribu Juda, Radix David! Alleluia!)
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To: DallasBiff

I’m cool with the Martian invasion. Capt. Kirk showed us what those green women look like…. I’ll tell ‘em I recently graduated from Star Fleet Academy and own my own dilithium crystal mine. That I’m looking for someone special to settle down with and raise some whitish-green kids.

But seriously I’m concerned about Santa being coerced into gifts for Martian boys and girls. What headache for all, auditing the good list for another planet, elves having to make more presents, and delivery- those reindeer aren’t getting any younger. Maybe the Martians should consider China, they make a lot of toys there anyway.


8 posted on 12/11/2023 12:01:48 PM PST by Made In The USA (Ellen Ate Dynamite Good Bye Ellen)
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To: fidelis

We watch this movie to laugh at it. Got a seventeen-year-old coming this holiday (son-in-law’s brother) and plan to make this required viewing for him.


9 posted on 12/11/2023 12:12:47 PM PST by caseinpoint (Don't get thickly involved in thin things.)
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To: fidelis

S-A-N-T-A C-L-A-U-S, Hooray for Santa Claus!


10 posted on 12/11/2023 1:47:45 PM PST by scrabblehack
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To: DallasBiff

I never realized Santa Claus had imperialist tendencies :D


11 posted on 12/11/2023 2:05:18 PM PST by LeoTDB69
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To: Made In The USA

His green women were Orions and not Martians. And it was Capt. Pike first in the pilot (The Cage). Played by Susan Oliver.

Kirk didn’t run into an Orion until the 3rd season. Played by Yvonne DeCarlo (BatGirl).

They had a super hot red hair Orion in the Star Trek movie with the alternate cast.


12 posted on 12/11/2023 2:06:57 PM PST by Fledermaus (It's time to get rid of the Three McStooges; Mitch, Kevin and Ronna! 1 gone, 1 almost dead. )
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To: Fledermaus

Hoping the United Federation of Planets doesn’t have an Admiral in charge Diversity and Inclusion, calling an Orion hottie a Martian could get a guy in trouble.


13 posted on 12/11/2023 2:40:02 PM PST by Made In The USA (Ellen Ate Dynamite Good Bye Ellen)
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To: Made In The USA; SaveFerris

Hoping the United Federation of Planets doesn’t have an Admiral in charge Diversity and Inclusion, calling an Orion hottie a Martian could get a guy in trouble.

^^^^^^^

So give you ID card to the border guard
Your alias says you got John Luke Picard
Of the United Federation of Planets
‘Cause they won’t speak English any ways


14 posted on 12/11/2023 2:42:27 PM PST by dfwgator (Endut! Hoch Hech!)
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To: Made In The USA

Admiral of DEI. They would.


15 posted on 12/11/2023 3:03:20 PM PST by Fledermaus (It's time to get rid of the Three McStooges; Mitch, Kevin and Ronna! 1 gone, 1 almost dead. )
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To: Berlin_Freeper

In our local theater in 1964, it was 10 cents, including 13 cartoons and a 3 Stooges movie.


16 posted on 12/11/2023 3:24:28 PM PST by mak5
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To: dfwgator

Put the sugar in the tank
of the sheriff’s car 🚗
He drives the deputy’s Dodge
they won’t get very far


17 posted on 12/11/2023 3:43:00 PM PST by SaveFerris (Luke 17:28 ... as it was in the days of Lot; they did eat, they drank, they bought, they sold ......)
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To: dfwgator

Ha, Pia Zadora as a kid

This could be the start of something big! /Lt. Frank Drebin


18 posted on 12/11/2023 3:46:03 PM PST by SaveFerris (Luke 17:28 ... as it was in the days of Lot; they did eat, they drank, they bought, they sold ......)
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To: scrabblehack

That is SantE Claus.


19 posted on 12/11/2023 3:48:26 PM PST by mware
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To: fidelis

Lyrics
TOM
Open up your heart and let the
Patrick Swayze Christmas in
CROW
We’ll gather at the Road House
With our next of kin
JOEL
And Santa can be
Our regular Saturday Night thing
ALL
We’ll decorate a barstool
And gather ‘round and sing
TOM
Oh
Let’s have a Patrick Swayze
Christmas this year!
CROW
Or we’ll tear your throat out
And kick you in the ear
Joel Robinson: Hold it, hold it a sec. Cambot, stop it.

[music stops]
Joel Robinson: Uh, Crow, I don’t know if I think this is an appropriate sentiment anymore for Christmas.
Crow T. Robot: Hey, what? Like a good action sequence don’t belong at Christmas?
Joel Robinson: Well, no, it’s just that I’ve never heard of an action sequence in a Christmas carol before.
Crow T. Robot: Well, then grab hold of your socks and read on, Joel Robinson!
Tom Servo: Okay, pick it up from measure 20, Cambot.
[music resumes]
Tom Servo: Lovely intro, though. Very tasteful.
Crow T. Robot: Thank you.
TOM
It’s my way or the highway
This Christmas at my bar
CROW
I’ll have to smash your kneecaps if
You bastards touch my car
JOEL
I got the word that Santa has been
Stealing from the till
ALL
I think that that right jolly old elf
Better make out his will
Oh
Let’s have a Patrick Swayze
Christmas one and all

And this can be the haziest...
This can be the laziest...
This can be the Swayziest
Christmas of them all!
TOM
La la la la la la
Ha ha!


20 posted on 12/11/2023 4:08:18 PM PST by Conan the Librarian (Conan the Sailing Librarian)
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