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City Of Chicago Sues Murder Victims For Not Getting Out Of The Way Of Bullets
The Bee ^ | September 1, 2023

Posted on 09/01/2023 7:25:14 PM PDT by Navy Patriot

Chicago Mayor Brandon Johnson announced this week that Chicago is bringing a lawsuit against the estates of thousands of murder victims for failing to step out of the way of bullets when they were shot at.

"There is a crime wave being fed by too many sluggish shooting victims," said Johnson to a roomful of gang members disguised as journalists. "How hard is it to take a couple of steps to the right, or maybe duck once in a while? The gross negligence of Chicago's murder victims is out of control and we will hold them accountable."

The lawsuit comes as part of a multi-pronged effort to fight crime in the city, which will also include suing convenience store owners for having so many tempting treats to steal, suing car manufacturers for making cars that can be broken into, and suing babies for being too easy to kidnap.

(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...


TOPICS: Business/Economy; Education; Health/Medicine
KEYWORDS: babylonbee
Chicago needs the money.

Dope is getting expensive.

1 posted on 09/01/2023 7:25:14 PM PDT by Navy Patriot
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To: Navy Patriot

LOL, when I first read the headline I figured it very believable, the Bee strikes first again!


2 posted on 09/01/2023 7:30:38 PM PDT by PROCON (Sic Semper Tyrannis)
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To: PROCON

Same here!


3 posted on 09/01/2023 8:25:21 PM PDT by Irish Eyes
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To: PROCON

They’re suing car manufacturers for car thefts so this is probably coming.


4 posted on 09/01/2023 8:30:16 PM PDT by Lurkina.n.Learnin (The road to tyranny is paved with compliance )
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To: PROCON

I thought something similar with crime victims in Chicago since Chicago sued Kia over car the if’s. To De Mayor it would make perfect sense 🤣


5 posted on 09/01/2023 9:00:57 PM PDT by Lockbox (politicians, they all seemed like game show hosts to me.... Sting)
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To: Navy Patriot

Bookmark


6 posted on 09/01/2023 10:16:33 PM PDT by aquila48 (Do not let them make you "care" ! Guilting you is how they control you. )
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To: Navy Patriot

The day is coming at the rate things look.


7 posted on 09/02/2023 12:40:08 AM PDT by metmom (He who testifies to these things says, “Surely I am coming soon.” Amen. Come, Lord Jesus.)
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To: All

LOL.......

“There is a crime wave being fed by too many lazy, sluggish shooting victims,”
said Chicago Mayor Johnson to a roomful of gang members disguised as journalists.

“How hard is it to take a couple of steps to the right, or maybe duck once in a while?”

“The gross negligence of Chicago’s murder victims is out of control and we will hold them accountable.”


8 posted on 09/02/2023 5:00:32 AM PDT by Liz (More tears are shed over answered prayers than over unanswered ones. St Teresa of Avila)
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