Posted on 07/22/2023 8:11:48 PM PDT by Lazamataz
First of all, much to the dismay of many, I did not die tonight.
Secondly, I've seen these funeral threads before where people mourn the FReeper and talk about what they meant to them (and more than a few FReepers who celebrate the death).
But what's the point of that? Does the dead FReeper know anything, or see any of the kind or crass remarks about them?
No. Pointless. We should have these sort of threads BEFORE they die.
So that's why I'm doing my obituary thread tonight. Plus, there is the added advantage of me knowing the exact date (7/22/2023) and and time (10:34PM) of my death!
Arrangements may be sent to: Egotistical Clown Funeral Home, 2312 Dumb Vanity Road, Atlanta, GA. 30321
Donations on his behalf may be sent to the Gun Owners of America.
Well, I would guess something he “hit”, hit him back.
Happy Birthday Laz. :^)
Damn! For a moment, I thought someone hit Laz!!
Lazamataz will rise again on July 25th and I will find colored eggs strewn on my lawn.
And live all days like there just might be one more.
Can I inherit the list and phone numbers of your female “friends”?
RIP bro. Hey, did you make a will? I was hoping you could leave me that trick you do where you talk in complete gibberish? And also your list of snappy comebacks. And now that you’re gone, can you please take me off the Laz ping list?
I heard he ‘hit’ one too many...
FRgards....praying for his family
Laz meant a lot to me as well. At least the $100 he still owed me.
CUSTOMER: Here's one.
CART MASTER: Nine pence.
DEAD PERSON: I'm not dead!
CART MASTER: What?
CUSTOMER: Nothing. Here's your nine pence.
DEAD PERSON: I'm not dead!
CART MASTER: 'Ere. He says he's not dead!
CUSTOMER: Yes, he is.
DEAD PERSON: I'm not!
CART MASTER: He isn't?
CUSTOMER: Well, he will be soon. He's very ill.
DEAD PERSON: I'm getting better!
CUSTOMER: No, you're not. You'll be stone dead in a moment.
CART MASTER: Oh, I can't take him like that. It's against regulations.
DEAD PERSON: I don't want to go on the cart!
CUSTOMER: Oh, don't be such a baby.
CART MASTER: I can't take him.
DEAD PERSON: I feel fine!
CUSTOMER: Well, do us a favor.
CART MASTER: I can't.
CUSTOMER: Well, can you hang around a couple of minutes? He won't be long.
CART MASTER: No, I've got to go to the Robinsons'. They've lost nine today.
CUSTOMER: Well, when's your next round?
CART MASTER: Thursday.
DEAD PERSON: I think I'll go for a walk.
CUSTOMER: You're not fooling anyone, you know. Look. Isn't there something you can do?
DEAD PERSON: [singing] I feel happy. I feel happy.
[whop]
CUSTOMER: Ah, thanks very much.
CART MASTER: Not at all. See you on Thursday.
CUSTOMER: Right. All right.
Laz gave me my first hit of acid at the customs office in Niagara Falls while crossing the border just before the Grateful Dead concert in 1982. “Here, eat this quick!” he said, and I could not disobey. We were tripping balls by the time Jerry sang the first lines of Jack Straw that night. Always with the perfect timing this he was.
Sure..
I’ll miss Him.
He was a good guy, but a bit cray-cray.
BOOP!
Be prepared for the keywords to become a No Fun Zone.
Yeah, I understand that, but it is the MANNER of my death that bothers me.
I mean, how many people are killed by 76 angry husbands (simultaneously), while dressed in a clown outfit, smeared head to tow in orange marmalade, surrounded by 17 monkeys, with his finger in a outlet and a lightbulb (glowing) screwed in his ass?
I mean, that's just SICK.
I really appreciate Laz’s humor. Since I too live in Georgia, I always think of him as a neighbor. He would be dearly missed.
RIP LAZ! (Or at least sleep well tonight).
Great, now Brandon has another vote.
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