Posted on 01/16/2023 8:47:41 PM PST by Tolerance Sucks Rocks
WASHINGTON, DC — The mood around the nation's capital was somber today after congressional leaders made the declaration that any member who refuses to bow down before the bust of Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky would be thrown into a fiery furnace.
"The installment of the official bust of the great President Zelensky is a great moment for our nation," said Speaker of the House Kevin McCarthy to an assembly of reporters at the capitol building. "Any member of this body who will not comply with the edict to bow before it will suffer the consequences."
Conservative voters were taken aback when South Carolina Republican Congressman Joe Wilson presented legislation to place a permanent bust in a prominent location in the Capitol. "I think some of these members of Congress must have attended a few too many cocaine orgies," said concerned citizen Sal Belfonte. "Placing a bust of a Ukrainian president in the U.S. Capitol could only seem like a good idea if you're really, really high."
Rumors spread that Congress was seeking to appease Zelensky with the bust after he submitted yet another request for more funding for Ukraine's war against Russia. "We're actually running out of money to give him," said one lawmaker under the condition of anonymity. "Unless we raise taxes and bring in more from our citizens, we don't have much more to offer him."
At publishing time, leaders of both houses of Congress had given orders to heat the U.S. Capitol's fiery furnace seven times hotter in preparation for executing any dissenting lawmakers.
(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...
Heh! Good one.
They said this was the line to the showers, right? It’s kinda dark in here.
🤣🤣🤣 or kiss the a$$ of the bust
Too bad both Putin and Zelenskyy can’t swing from the same scaffold, as far as I’m concerned. (Yeah, lots of others could join the show…)
Is the bust if him in bondage gear or a sweatshirt? This has to be a deciding factor for some congress critters.
It ran from 2015 to 2019, which by "pure coincidence" ended just before running and winning the Presidency of Ukraine, which consisted of YouTube videos against government corruption.
Perfectly plausible to me.
+1
Congress already had that rule for Pelozi’s bust.
Note that NONE of the Ukraine Cheerleaders seem bothered by the DNC Money-Laundering link of Zelensky. They just ‘conveniently’ ignore that aspect.
It’s almost like they’re not really conservatives, but instead people who are occasionally activated for a single issue and won’t talk about anything bad regarding that issue.
California...drugs... Zelensky probably doesn’t want any statue resembling him to be made, but he probably won’t say anything about it, either.
Why just a Bust? More Like a heroic statue—bigger than the MLK statue—with Mr. Z holding out his hand in a blessing? Maybe covered in Gold? Americans can sacrifice their sons and daughters to it—and will as soldiers to defend Ukraine to the death from evil Putinistas.
“They are into Biden Worship. Until Biden said “ Ukraine must be defended” They were mute. He said that and in one accord they rose up like trained seals, echoed what Biden said with millions of their voices”
Well stated, and it was no different for Syria, Serbia, and likely other stupid US adventures. But the thing about this one is that we’ll be a Third World country by the time everything shakes out, not in 20 or 30 years as was the case prior to Ukraine, but 5 years, or less.
Babylon Bee, it was funny, but not as good as some...
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