Posted on 01/12/2023 1:45:01 PM PST by Tench_Coxe
NEW YORK, NY — Pfizer scientists are hard at work on a new vaccine that will eliminate the deadly effects of gas stove emissions. If successful, the shot will allow for the use of a gas stove in a well-ventilated environment without masks.
"If you take these shots you will no longer be at risk of breathing in fumes from an easily preventable gas leak. You won't get sick and you won't have to quarantine away from the stove," said Pfizer's Albert Bourla in a statement. "I know we said some of the same things with the COVID shots, but this time we mean it. Really."
(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...
The Bee is bust-a-gut funny!
Gas stoves everywhere stop working suddenly?
Awesome.
There’s a great thread on Tweater where people post pics of prominent libs and Dems cooking on gas stoves.
FLOTUS
AOC
Beta O’Dork
Gavin Newsom
Booty-Gig
Greta Thunberg
Fauxcahontas (her’s says the methane is stolen from tribal lands)
Thank you Pfizer!
I also have a gas water heater and a propane weed burner. How many boosters do I need?
They have lucked into a treasure trove of stupidity and incompetence with the current batch of morons running the government in the 2020s...
This vax will work best in democrats.
Sounds like transporting gas is a problem. Call Butt Boy.
The vaccine works by closing the airways of those injected so that they are unable to inhale toxic fumes and become brain-damaged or asthmatic. Results of early animal tests show a 100% efficacy against gas stoves. “Our dead monkeys were very smart right before they died,” said Pfizer scientist Josef Mengele, laughing maniacally for some reason. “I think we’ve collected enough data that we can skip human trials.”
Wear a mask when operating and stand 6 feet away from the stove top when using.
😂 Hillaryous! Thanks for posting.
When is Pfizer gonna learn. The deadly effects of a sniff of that shit is irreversible.
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