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To Protest Florida Law, Apple Announces IPhones Will Now Autocorrect Every Word To 'Gay'
babylonbee.com ^ | 3/31/2022 | STAFF

Posted on 03/31/2022 4:09:54 PM PDT by bitt

Apple, Inc. is coming out forcefully against Florida's parental rights bill, known to trans activists as the "Don't Say Gay" bill.

As part of a coordinated attack on the bill, CEO Tim Cook announced that all iPhones will receive an update that will make them autocorrect every word typed in the phone to the word "gay."

"Gay gay gay, gay gay," said Cook in an angry address to investors. "GAY! Gay gay gay, gay gay! GAAAYYYYYYYY! Gay. Gaygaygaygaygaygaygaygaygay!"

"It's the right thing to do," he added finally.

Apple says that while this new feature may be frustrating for the 900 million iPhone users, it will be worth it to see millions of people around the world saying "gay" over and over again.

"That will really get on DeSantis's nerves!" said Cook gleefully.

Cook went on to explain that the update will remain in place until kindergarten teachers can help students determine their gender as well as who they are sexually attracted to before the age of 6. Once the bill is reversed, gay gay gay gay, gay gay.

Gay.


TOPICS: Conspiracy; Humor; Society
KEYWORDS: apple; babylonbee; floridalaw; gay; gaygay; gaygaygay; gaygaygaygay; gaygaygaygaygay; yag

1 posted on 03/31/2022 4:09:54 PM PDT by bitt
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To: bitt

2 posted on 03/31/2022 4:10:26 PM PDT by bitt ( <img src=' 'width=50%> )
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To: Whenifhow; null and void; aragorn; EnigmaticAnomaly; kalee; Kale; AZ .44 MAG; Baynative; bgill; ...

p


3 posted on 03/31/2022 4:10:42 PM PDT by bitt ( <img src=' 'width=50%> )
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To: bitt

April Fools one day early?


4 posted on 03/31/2022 4:11:13 PM PDT by FrdmLvr
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To: bitt

Their phones will not spell pedophile for you.


5 posted on 03/31/2022 4:14:23 PM PDT by TornadoAlley3 ( I'm Proud To Be An Okie From Muskogee)
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To: bitt

“Hi mom,”

“Heading out to the Tigor Club to be with freinds.”

“Love, your favorit son :)”

What mom gets...

“Hi mom,”

“Heading out to the Gay Club to be with gays.”

“Love, your gay son :)”


6 posted on 03/31/2022 4:16:38 PM PDT by WeaslesRippedMyFlesh
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To: FrdmLvr

What does the Babylon Bee do on April Fool’s Day? Put out stories which are literally true because everyone will automatically assume they are false?


7 posted on 03/31/2022 4:19:02 PM PDT by Verginius Rufus
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To: Verginius Rufus

Ask me tomorrow.


8 posted on 03/31/2022 4:39:04 PM PDT by null and void (Bokassa always used to say, ‘You can’t feed people with politics.’)
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To: bitt

It had me there then I saw the Bee!


9 posted on 03/31/2022 4:40:06 PM PDT by Morgana ( Always a bit of truth in dark humor. )
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To: bitt

Gay


10 posted on 03/31/2022 4:41:20 PM PDT by glorgau
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To: bitt

Gay


11 posted on 03/31/2022 6:22:00 PM PDT by ptsal (Vote R.E.D. >>>Remove Every Democrat ***)
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To: bitt

Homo?


12 posted on 04/01/2022 6:20:23 AM PDT by Spacetrucker (George Washington didn't use his freedom of speech to defeat the British - HE SHOT THEM .. WITH GUNS)
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