Free Republic
Browse · Search
General/Chat
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

I GAVE MYSELF THREE MONTHS TO CHANGE MY PERSONALITY
The Atlantic ^ | FEBRUARY 10, 2022 | Olga Khazan

Posted on 02/15/2022 12:14:31 PM PST by nickcarraway

The results were mixed.

One morning last summer, I woke up and announced, to no one in particular: “I choose to be happy today!” Next I journaled about the things I was grateful for and tried to think more positively about my enemies and myself. When someone later criticized me on Twitter, I suppressed my rage and tried to sympathize with my hater. Then, to loosen up and expand my social skills, I headed to an improv class.

I was midway through an experiment—sample size: 1—to see whether I could change my personality. Because these activities were supposed to make me happier, I approached them with the desperate hope of a supplicant kneeling at a shrine.

Psychologists say that personality is made up of five traits: extroversion, or how sociable you are; conscientiousness, or how self-disciplined and organized you are; agreeableness, or how warm and empathetic you are; openness, or how receptive you are to new ideas and activities; and neuroticism, or how depressed or anxious you are. People tend to be happier and healthier when they score higher on the first four traits and lower on neuroticism. I’m pretty open and conscientious, but I’m low on extroversion, middling on agreeableness, and off the charts on neuroticism.

Researching the science of personality, I learned that it was possible to deliberately mold these five traits, to an extent, by adopting certain behaviors. I began wondering whether the tactics of personality change could work on me.

(Excerpt) Read more at theatlantic.com ...


TOPICS: Education; Health/Medicine; Miscellaneous
KEYWORDS:
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first previous 1-2021-4041-6061-67 next last
To: SkyDancer

Martini joke...

Two friends were riding home from work when they spotted
two dogs having sex in the front yard of a house. One said
to the other that he’d love to have his wife like that.
the second guy said to try some martinis, as that always
worked for his wife.
The next week they were on their way home again when they
passed the same yard and the second guy asked the first one
about how it turned out. the first guy said it worked but
was too expensive. the second fellow said Why it only takes
two or three for his wife at which the first guy said...

Heck, it took twelve just to get his wife naked on the
front lawn...!


21 posted on 02/15/2022 12:49:58 PM PST by tet68 ( " We would not die in that man's company, that fears his fellowship to die with us...." Henry V.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 4 | View Replies]

To: nickcarraway

shoulda started by pulling her head out of her forth point of contact...


22 posted on 02/15/2022 12:52:51 PM PST by Chode (there is no fall back position, there's no rally point, there is no LZ... we're on our own. #FJB)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: tet68

LOL!


23 posted on 02/15/2022 12:56:18 PM PST by SkyDancer ( I make airplanes fly, what's your super power?)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 21 | View Replies]

To: NEMDF

Right. The Bible says the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God.

There is lots very wrong going on. We all see it. Anger wastes your energy though. Use your energy for positive change. There is lots of good you can do.


24 posted on 02/15/2022 12:56:38 PM PST by Persevero (You cannot comply your way out of tyranny. )
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 18 | View Replies]

To: cuban leaf

We women tend to avoid conflict. I’d rather take a few hits than make someone mad.


25 posted on 02/15/2022 12:57:42 PM PST by Persevero (You cannot comply your way out of tyranny. )
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: NEMDF

Nobody can make you angry but yourself.................


26 posted on 02/15/2022 1:01:52 PM PST by Red Badger (Homeless veterans camp in the streets while illegal aliens are put up in hotels.....................)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 18 | View Replies]

To: cuban leaf

So what your saying is....


27 posted on 02/15/2022 1:03:18 PM PST by Organic Panic (Democrats. Memories as short as Joe Biden's eyes)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: John Milner

Yes, that’s the corollary. Only thing is, my sister isn’t happy when she’s bitching. She’s still miserable. She just wants company in her hell, and I refuse to go there. She always apologizes later, and I try to tell her to let it go, because that’s what I do. If I keep regurgitating the unpleasant thoughts, they hover around longer. It’s toxic.


28 posted on 02/15/2022 1:03:23 PM PST by FamiliarFace
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 16 | View Replies]

To: nickcarraway

First and best thing you can do to feel better. Throw out your television.


29 posted on 02/15/2022 1:04:01 PM PST by Organic Panic (Democrats. Memories as short as Joe Biden's eyes)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: FamiliarFace

Sounds like one of my sisters.

She lives in a world of absolutes. Black and white , all or nothing and no in between.

I haven’t spoken to her in six years because I voted for Trump.

“He’s a racist! she claimed.


30 posted on 02/15/2022 1:04:18 PM PST by jmacusa (America.Founded by geniuses. Now governed by idiots. )
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 9 | View Replies]

To: dfwgator

I knew Zappa, went to his house lots of times, he was a real nice guy, I liked him


31 posted on 02/15/2022 1:05:54 PM PST by eyeamok (founded in cynicism, wrapped in sarcasm)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 15 | View Replies]

To: Jamestown1630

There you go, yes.


32 posted on 02/15/2022 1:08:36 PM PST by SaxxonWoods ("If you see no reason for giving thanks, the fault lies in yourself." - Minquass)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 12 | View Replies]

To: cuban leaf

Men are more independent, aggressive, and risk takers.

“Fortis Fortuna Adiuvat”


33 posted on 02/15/2022 1:17:51 PM PST by EEGator
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: jmacusa

My sister and I still talk every day. Well, we text. We try not to talk about politics or religion. Sometimes it creeps in anyway. Nothing I say will change her mind. I guess that’s fair, because she can’t change mine either.


34 posted on 02/15/2022 1:21:38 PM PST by FamiliarFace
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 30 | View Replies]

To: Organic Panic

The second thing is to not participate on social media.


35 posted on 02/15/2022 1:24:21 PM PST by FamiliarFace
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 29 | View Replies]

To: NEMDF

“Seriously, I need to dial back on my constant anger, which cannot be good for my overall well-being. But maybe the lesson here is that it will not be possible.”

Yes, it’s possible. You have nothing to lose but your anger, go for it my FRiend! The fact that you realize it means you are already past the hardest step. Make up a short positive sentence that says you have already accomplished what you want to do. “I radiate serenity and peace to all I meet” is an example.

Here’s a famous one: “In adversity, I look for the seed of an equivalent benefit, being always thankful for the lessons I am learning.”

Rock. On.


36 posted on 02/15/2022 1:24:42 PM PST by SaxxonWoods ("If you see no reason for giving thanks, the fault lies in yourself." - Minquass)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 18 | View Replies]

To: cornfedcowboy
Interesting. I am in a highly competitive business and I am one of the least competitive people I know.

You probably survive and do well because you are good at what you do - as opposed to so many in 'competitive' fields who survive and progress despite incompetence - because they are aggressive, self-promoting, and willing to do whatever it takes to promote themselves (i.e. lacking ethical boundaries). Think Hillary.

Remember, the cream doesn't generally rise to the top. Feces floats.

37 posted on 02/15/2022 1:25:46 PM PST by neverevergiveup
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 19 | View Replies]

To: eyeamok

You were lucky to hang with such a creative mind, I’m jealous!


38 posted on 02/15/2022 1:25:53 PM PST by SaxxonWoods ("If you see no reason for giving thanks, the fault lies in yourself." - Minquass)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 31 | View Replies]

To: NEMDF

I think we always have a choice. Maybe you are angry, but you don’t have to be focused on the stuff that makes you angry all the time. Instead, think of a couple of things that bring you some sort of happiness. I like to garden, cook, and watch nature. Also music tends to lift my spirits. So when I get upset, those are the activities I try to immerse myself in.


39 posted on 02/15/2022 1:29:39 PM PST by FamiliarFace
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 18 | View Replies]

To: nickcarraway

Oh look, another chick writing boring nonsense about herself. I’m so special and interesting. Blah, blah, blah...


40 posted on 02/15/2022 1:30:14 PM PST by Trailerpark Badass (“There should be a whole lot more going on than throwing bleach,” said one woman.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]


Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first previous 1-2021-4041-6061-67 next last

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
General/Chat
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson