Posted on 01/01/2022 9:14:09 AM PST by Twotone
It's that time of year again—when the infallible prophets at The Babylon Bee tell you what will happen in the next year with 100% accuracy! Will 2022 be better than this year? You decide!
Here is a definitive list of things that will happen in 2022:
January 1 - USPS will deliver your Christmas package
January 6 - Second insurrection attempt canceled
January 20 - Pfizer unveils booster shots 4, 5, 6, 7, and 8
January 21 - Men break every record ever held by women
January 22 - Harvard gender studies professor discovers five new pronouns
January 23 - The Babylon Bee discovers a 3rd conservative joke
January 25 - Obama releases another memoir
January 27 - Mark Zuckerberg finally learns how to smile with his eyes
February 1 - WHO runs out of Greek letters for variants and starts naming them after the Muppets
February 2 - Jan 6th committee finally catches your Grandma
February 26 - China officially annexes United States
March 1 - Bill Clinton plants the flag on brand new Epstein Island
March 3 - Space Force training exercise accidentally blows up Mars
March 10 - Obama releases yet another new memoir
March 25 - Meat is outlawed, replaced with delicious bugs instead
April 1 - AOC red-pilled after reading an economics book
April 19 - Man dressed as woman hailed as first woman to not complain about being cold
May 5 - Hollywood studio announces all-female reboot of Ghostbusters: Afterlife
(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...
China has ALREADY annexed the United States.
“Apr-1 AOC red-pilled after reading an economics book.” I can’t help but notice it falls on April Fools Day.
Today my son said Joe will get sick and die soon ...
I told him they will stuff him and keep him in the basement ...
THANKS! fun if maybe a bit too likely
bttt
Weekend at Joey’s
Japanese Admiral Isoroku Yamamoto advised his Emperor that: “You cannot invade mainland United States. There would be a rifle behind every blade of grass.”
The Chinese Communists are smart. They haven’t “invaded” or even bombed USA like the Japanese did, planned..... rather the Chinese are just exporting millions of agents to spy on USA from inside. And to infiltrate high tech, military, and university research laboratories.
And to take over as much of the business sector as possible.
The idea is control over key sectors and financial profit. The last thing the Chinese Communists really need to do is invade or have to pay our ridiculous welfare expenses (they wouldn’t pay those, anyway, they’d just send the able-bodied recipients to slave labor factories)
January 22 - Harvard gender studies professor discovers five new pronouns
This one will happen.
Weekend at Brandon’s
LOL...lots of uproarious good ones in there. My faves...
Men break every record ever held by women
Harvard gender studies professor discovers five new pronouns
Bill Clinton plants the flag on brand new Epstein Island
Space Force training exercise accidentally blows up Mars
November 8, 2022 - conservatives and republicans watch as media calls a nationwide Democrat landslide.
November 9, 2022 - conservatives and republicans watch as counting continues in most precincts.
November 10, 2022 - conservatives and republicans watch as election after election is finalized as Democrat win.
January 5, 2023 - conservatives and republicans watch as a convention of states is called and dominated by Democrats.
March 5, 2023 - conservatives and republicans watch as the New Living Constitution is passed into law.
June 5, 2023 - conservatives and republicans watch as the New Living Constitution is amended to allow random searches of whites, whites with social credit scores below 200 are deemed a threat to society and sent to camps north of Fairbanks, Alaska.
Nov 5, 2023 - conservatives and republicans watch (if there were any left) as the Democrat Party is declared the only Party and its leader assumes the title of President For Life.
LOL
I dont think they’ll drag Joes carcass around town ...
and I dont see him as the life of the party ...
Willard thinks hes supposed to be president-for-Life ...
His Big Daddy George Romney told him so and groomed him for the position ...
I’ll bet it’s fun working at The Bee
Not an accident, for sure
I’m looking forward to the Covid variant called Cookie Monster!
I’m waiting for the Miss Piggy variant myself.
When they do that nobody will catch on until he doesn’t go out for ice cream.
#1 is a big maybe.
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