Posted on 09/13/2020 3:44:59 AM PDT by sodpoodle
#1 - Talk to yourself. There are times you need expert advice.
#2 - “In Style” are the clothes that still fit.
#3 - You don't need anger management. You need people to stop pissing you off.
#4 - Your people skills are just fine. It's your tolerance for idiots that needs work.
#5 - The biggest lie you tell yourself is, “I don't need to write that down. I'll remember it.”
#6 - “On time” is when you get there.
#7 - Even duct tape can't fix stupid - but it sure does muffle the sound.
#8 - It would be wonderful if we could put ourselves in the dryer for ten minutes, then come out wrinkle-free…and three sizes smaller?
#9 - Lately, you've noticed people your age are so much older than you.
#10 - Growing old should have taken longer.
#11 - Aging has slowed you down, but it hasn't shut you up.
#12 - You still haven't learned to act your age and hope you never will.
And one more:
“One for the road” means peeing before you leave the house.
Reminds me, “Alexa order more duct tape.” Oh wait, I don’t use Alexa.
You can talk to yourself but don’t answer yourself.
lol...
There is one activity which is even more productive...and that is when I argue with myself. Great leaps forward from that.
Smart enough to not be fooled and blinded by emotional, brainless leftistisms.
“You can talk to yourself but don’t answer yourself.”
So how am I supposed to have an intelligent conversation?
God has a lot on his plate and He spends an awful lot of his time taking care of the idiots of the world. How can I expect Him to free up a half hour or so whenever I want to talk? How many idiots would die if I was taking His time yakking away about the roast I’m cooking or the tomatoes I grew?
You forgot. Don’t vote fr senior citizens who comprehend less than you do
“We get too soon old and too late Smart!”
What about fist fights with yourself? And what if you lose all the time? And does 52 count if you feel like you’re 92? :-)
Waking up is a miraculous way to stat the day...pains and aches become a welcome statement of the gift of life.
If you can’t talk to yourself, who can you talk to?
“Never take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.”
There is no such thing as:
Being too thin
Having too much money
Having too many guns
Having too much ammo
Having too many types of ‘duct ‘ tape or Gorilla tape.
Having too many tools
Having too many books
Having too many kitchen items
Having too many .....................
Old age? Waddya mean...
I woke up this morning feeling like a million bucks...
All green and wrinkled...
#13: Do it now - later you won’t even remember what “it” was.
Don’t buy green bananas.
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