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Protests Erupt As Police Shoot Man Who Was Just One Gun Away From Being Unarmed
The Babylon Bee ^ | 9-8-2020 | Staff

Posted on 09/08/2020 12:02:18 PM PDT by servo1969

LOS ANGELES, CA--In another controversial shooting, Andres Ryan was shot by police after allegedly robbing a convenience store. Ryan was completely unarmed -- give or take one firearm. The police tried to justify the shooting, saying they felt threatened by Ryan, despite his having only one gun more than completely harmless and the police having many more guns. The shooting immediately led to protests, though, as he was yet another person shot by police who only had zero-to-one guns.

"We have no choice but to try to loot a Target," said an Antifa member who wished to remain unnamed. "I can't think of any other way to approach something like this."

Many politicians have condemned the police, saying they need to show more restraint when nearly not being shot at. Presidential candidate Joe Biden has traveled to visit the injured Ryan personally, a visit during which Ryan mugged him.


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: andresryan; babylonbee; california; losangeles; mostlyunarmed; onegunfrombeingarmed; satire
The best satire is nearly indistinguishable from the truth.


1 posted on 09/08/2020 12:02:18 PM PDT by servo1969
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To: servo1969

“Mostly unarmed.”


2 posted on 09/08/2020 12:03:44 PM PDT by Mr. Blond
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To: Mr. Blond

Exactly my thought. Would have been much funnier


3 posted on 09/08/2020 12:04:24 PM PDT by Jewbacca (The residents of Iroquois territory may not determine whether Jews may live in Jerusalem)
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To: servo1969

4 posted on 09/08/2020 12:05:01 PM PDT by dfwgator (Endut! Hoch Hech!)
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To: servo1969

Bookmark


5 posted on 09/08/2020 12:12:42 PM PDT by aquila48 (Do not let them make you care! Guilting you is how they control you.)
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To: servo1969

Satire or not, the Babylon Bee hits home entirely too many times!


6 posted on 09/08/2020 12:26:11 PM PDT by SES1066 (Happiness is a depressed Washington, DC housing market!)
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To: servo1969

The Bee ain’t just foolin around

;’}


7 posted on 09/08/2020 1:29:24 PM PDT by rockrr ( Everything is different now...)
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To: servo1969

8 posted on 09/08/2020 1:50:58 PM PDT by Dick Bachert (THE DEEP STATE HATES YOU!)
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