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Newly Mustachioed Bill De Blasio Unveils Special Red Armbands...
Babylon Bee ^ | May 1st, 2020 | Babylon Bee

Posted on 05/04/2020 3:57:55 PM PDT by jonascord

NEW YORK, NY—Having let his facial hair grow freely for several weeks, New York Mayor Bill De Blasio held a press conference this morning where he unveiled special red armbands for police enforcing the city's quarantine on the Jewish community.

"The red armband represents our commitment to public health," he said. "City workers and police who want to show their loyalty to making sure undesirable groups are not breaking quarantine will be asked to wear the bands for easy identification."

"The third glorious era of New York will reign triumphant!" he cried, banging on his lectern. "Together we can reclaim the glories of our once-great kingdom!"

The mayor also suggesting some kind of camp that could concentrate on the Jews, as well as maybe some way to identify them in public so people could keep away from "undesirable" contact with them. "We could take them to the camp on the subway trains."

Some are saying the move represents bad optics for the city's mayor. But he didn't seem to see any issue with the bands, saying they simply helped identify the special squadrons of police that would focus on the Jewish community. "We'll call them the S.S. for short," he said.

He also announced his plans to invade Poland.


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: newyork
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To: jonascord

The problem is that the REAL “fake news” comes out with stories even MORE outlandish than this, and they are actually true.


41 posted on 05/04/2020 5:14:07 PM PDT by GOP Congress
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To: jonascord

42 posted on 05/04/2020 5:18:22 PM PDT by Albion Wilde ("Some of these people, I met them -- zero interest, Okay? Like zero." -- Donald J. Trump)
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To: Yo-Yo

Fegelein! Fegelein! FEGELEIN!


43 posted on 05/04/2020 5:21:36 PM PDT by Campion (What part of "shall not be infringed" don't they understand?)
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To: ronnie raygun

“HE NEEDS TO BE HIT IN THE FACE WITH A BAG OF SH##”

Yep..... just like Gates got pie-faced not long ago.

Friggin hilarious.


44 posted on 05/04/2020 5:31:26 PM PDT by LastDayz (A blunt and brazen Texan. I will not be assimilated.)
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To: Dr. Ursus

:-))


45 posted on 05/04/2020 6:11:06 PM PDT by colorado tanker
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To: jonascord

Gotta love The Bee....


46 posted on 05/05/2020 3:39:13 AM PDT by trebb (Don't howl about illegal leeches, or Trump in general, while not donating to FR - it's hypocritical.)
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