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Newly Mustachioed Bill De Blasio Unveils Special Red Armbands...
Babylon Bee ^ | May 1st, 2020 | Babylon Bee

Posted on 05/04/2020 3:57:55 PM PDT by jonascord

NEW YORK, NY—Having let his facial hair grow freely for several weeks, New York Mayor Bill De Blasio held a press conference this morning where he unveiled special red armbands for police enforcing the city's quarantine on the Jewish community.

"The red armband represents our commitment to public health," he said. "City workers and police who want to show their loyalty to making sure undesirable groups are not breaking quarantine will be asked to wear the bands for easy identification."

"The third glorious era of New York will reign triumphant!" he cried, banging on his lectern. "Together we can reclaim the glories of our once-great kingdom!"

The mayor also suggesting some kind of camp that could concentrate on the Jews, as well as maybe some way to identify them in public so people could keep away from "undesirable" contact with them. "We could take them to the camp on the subway trains."

Some are saying the move represents bad optics for the city's mayor. But he didn't seem to see any issue with the bands, saying they simply helped identify the special squadrons of police that would focus on the Jewish community. "We'll call them the S.S. for short," he said.

He also announced his plans to invade Poland.


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: newyork
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To: jonascord

HE NEEDS TO BE HIT IN THE FACE WITH A BAG OF SH##


21 posted on 05/04/2020 4:13:05 PM PDT by ronnie raygun
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To: jonascord

Too Late. Madame Wretched Whitmer already planned and executed invading poland. Started on Hamtramck.


22 posted on 05/04/2020 4:15:33 PM PDT by epluribus_2 (He, had the best mom - ever.)
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To: epluribus_2
Too Late. Madame Wretched Whitmer already planned and executed invading poland. Started on Hamtramck.

I wonder how many will get that?

23 posted on 05/04/2020 4:17:12 PM PDT by dfwgator (Endut! Hoch Hech!)
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To: jonascord

Springtime for Blah-zo and NYC . . .


24 posted on 05/04/2020 4:18:24 PM PDT by colorado tanker
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To: epluribus_2
"Madame Wretched Whitmer already planned and executed invading Poland. Started on Hamtramck."

Frau Whitler's Afrika Korps has already retreated from Dearbornistan.

Her glorious Legions will have to look elsewhere for liebensraum.

Watch out Ohio.

25 posted on 05/04/2020 4:23:22 PM PDT by SnuffaBolshevik
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To: dfwgator

I gave him my baby to kiss, and he BIT IT IN THE HEAD!!


26 posted on 05/04/2020 4:26:42 PM PDT by decal (I'm not rude, I don't suffer fools is all.)
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To: jonascord

glanced up after 2nd paragraph


27 posted on 05/04/2020 4:27:39 PM PDT by kanawa ((Trump Loves a Great Deal (NorthernSentinel)))
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To: decal

He wouldn’t have had much fun in Stalingrad.


28 posted on 05/04/2020 4:31:12 PM PDT by dfwgator (Endut! Hoch Hech!)
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To: jonascord

Why doesn’t just put yellow six pointed star on them and show everybody what a swell guy he is!!!!!! /s


29 posted on 05/04/2020 4:33:33 PM PDT by Datom69
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To: colorado tanker

We have to save our phony baloney jobs!


30 posted on 05/04/2020 4:34:22 PM PDT by Dr. Ursus
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To: dfwgator

“Ah! Hein...dfwgator, you have the wrong map here you silly old leg-before-wicket English person.”


31 posted on 05/04/2020 4:36:39 PM PDT by decal (I'm not rude, I don't suffer fools is all.)
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To: jonascord

Unfortunately, I find this more believable than not, based upon Wihelm’s life long record.


32 posted on 05/04/2020 4:37:26 PM PDT by GreyFriar (Spearhead - 3rd Armored Division 75-78 & 83-87)
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To: Datom69

33 posted on 05/04/2020 4:41:05 PM PDT by Bonemaker (invictus maneo)
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To: jonascord

Heil Hizoner!


34 posted on 05/04/2020 4:42:52 PM PDT by Hazwaste (Democrats are like slinkies. Only good for pushing down stairs.)
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To: jonascord

OMG, the imbecile has re-invented the Gestapo and kapos! This one who’s always going on and on about racism and such. Please, please hang him as soon as possible and throw his accursed remains to pigs.


35 posted on 05/04/2020 4:54:10 PM PDT by EinNYC
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To: dfwgator
“Steiner’s attack will get it all under control”


36 posted on 05/04/2020 4:57:11 PM PDT by Yo-Yo ( is the /sarc tag really necessary?)
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To: decal

“If he opens his big mouth again, it’s lampshade time!”


37 posted on 05/04/2020 4:58:30 PM PDT by dfwgator (Endut! Hoch Hech!)
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To: EinNYC
"OMG, the imbecile has re-invented the Gestapo and kapos! This one who’s always going on and on about racism and such. Please, please hang him as soon as possible and throw his accursed remains to pigs."

Uhhhm, Babylon Bee... Not quite time to get your knickers in a knot.

People REALLY have to watch for that. Babylon Bee is always too close to the truth.

38 posted on 05/04/2020 5:05:26 PM PDT by jonascord (First rule of the Dunning-Kruger Club is that you do not know you are in the Dunning-Kruger club.)
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To: jonascord

We have satire tags for a reason. Emmanuel Macron read this and now Herr Obermayor has to figure out what to do with a million French POWs.


39 posted on 05/04/2020 5:08:50 PM PDT by KarlInOhio (Parachutes are only anecdotally effective due to the lack of significant double blind testing.)
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To: Brilliant
> The photo is obviously doctored. He would not be standing next to an American flag.

Your Freeper handle is well deserved !

40 posted on 05/04/2020 5:13:02 PM PDT by SecondAmendment (This just proves my latest theory ... LEFTISTS RUIN EVERYTHING)
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