Posted on 04/03/2020 10:54:58 AM PDT by dayglored
This season's colours are blue, white and bork
Bork!Bork!Bork! Chicago! A town famed for what some might regard as a jumped-up quiche masquerading as pizza and home of the first skyscraper. Could there be a better venue for today's bork?
We like Chicago, although we're less keen on the landing approach to the city's O'Hare airport, which left this hack feeling a tad poorly on one occasion as Boeing's finest tumbled through the turbulence.
Also unwell, and snapped by a Register reader, is this example of digital signage, caught borking in the window of LOFT, a women's clothing emporium. Sadly, a jaunt to the Windy City isn't on the cards at the moment, but we reckon that the store in question is located at 150 W Roosevelt Road.
LOFT itself recently celebrated its 20th anniversary, having been launched in 1998, and has 650 stores and outlets over North America. The brand has its roots in the Ann Taylor chain of clothing stores, which itself dates back to 1954. As such, the apparel slinger for ladies has been somewhat of a fixture in American life for some time.
As, to be honest, has a good old-fashioned BSOD.
Americans, and indeed the global village, have enjoyed screens of purest blue for a good few decades, despite the odd incursion by Doctor Watson every now and again.
While BSOD-themed blankets, throws, cushions and T-shirts have long been a thing, we can but applaud its arrival upon a screen normally used to encourage Chicago's purchasers of female fashion to splash the dollars on new apparel.
Unless, of course, the retailer is dumping the florals for a distinctly edgier NOT_LESS_OR_EQUAL emblazoned across the front of this season's outfits. Or maybe everyone's favourite: crash dump.
Seen some software struggling, or a bit of hardware throwing a wobbly where it probably shouldn't? The Register is waiting to hear from you. ®
My translator App must be broken.
I couldn’t even plow through the first sentence.
It was like trying to put a pair of pants on, and no matter how I started the process, I just couldn’t get them on.
My current build hasn’t had a BSOD yet, and God willing it never will until I decide to upgrade in a few years.
Please...anybody, nobody..... don't reply to MY post, LOL.
Leni
The early development version of Windows 95 was called Chicago... nice
“Exactly. Chicago deep dish pizza is the evolution of that flatbread thin-crust abomination into an art form.”
Bass akwards.
Chicago deep dish pizza is the bready bastard child that Texan Ike Sewell foisted on the world via the city of Chicago.
God is not amused at what has been done to the gift He gave the world via the Italians.
Chicago perverted His gift of Italian pizza.
Chicago regularly leads the nation in murders, graft and corruption.
Coincidence?
I think not.
Link to the ORIGINAL Computer Haikus. They’re still funny as hell.
IMAGINE IF INSTEAD OF CRYPTIC TEXT STRINGS, YOUR COMPUTER PRODUCED ERROR MESSAGES IN HAIKU…
A file that big?
It might be very useful.
But now it is gone.
Yesterday it worked
Today it is not working
Windows is like that
Stay the patient course
Of little worth is your ire
The network is down
Three things are certain:
Death, taxes, and lost data.
Guess which has occurred.
You step in the stream,
but the water has moved on.
This page is not here.
Out of memory.
We wish to hold the whole sky,
But we never will.
Having been erased,
The document you’re seeking
Must now be retyped.
Rather than a beep
Or a rude error message,
These words: “File not found.”
Serious error.
All shortcuts have disappeared.
Screen. Mind. Both are blank.
The Web site you seek
cannot be located but
endless others exist
Chaos reigns within.
Reflect, repent, and reboot.
Order shall return.
ABORTED effort:
Close all that you have.
You ask way too much.
First snow, then silence.
This thousand dollar screen dies
so beautifully.
With searching comes loss
and the presence of absence:
“My Novel” not found.
The Tao that is seen
Is not the true Tao, until
You bring fresh toner.
Windows NT crashed.
I am the Blue Screen of Death.
No one hears your screams.
A crash reduces
your expensive computer
to a simple stone.
Error messages
cannot completely convey.
We now know shared loss.
https://www.gnu.org/fun/jokes/error-haiku.en.html
It was shortly after pan pizza was developed that man walked on the moon. Coincidence?
If you are going to eat thin-crust pizza, order a pan pizza and then just eat the box.
“It was shortly after pan pizza was developed that man walked on the moon. Coincidence?”
That only proves the lengths of which some will go to get AWAY from the Chicago abomination.
I bought an Uno pizza on my way through Chicago once. Took one bite, threw the “pizza” away and did indeed eat the box. The box was much preferable in taste and texture to the so called “pizza”.
If I want pizza I eat the thin crust Italian original given to us by God.
If I want bread I eat a sandwich or a biscuit.
How did a conversation about pizza get this far before I was made aware??!?!?!
Italy pizza is Very different from ours.
They call our pizza lasagna :)
They also brought Chicago Blues to Ithaca, and the Blue Monday Jam at the Nines was fixture for many decades. I joined in a hundred times or so over the years.
Anyway, when you went to the bar, you could order either style. Fights broke out from time to time regarding the relative merits of the two styles, but were generally settled with quantities of beer.
Alas, the Nines closed down a few years ago. But its memory remains.
That’s a great story :)
I noticed you hadn’t chimed in therefore the ping.
I should have called it New York style pizza. But it was brought to the US through NYC by the Italian immigrants (as the Lord intended) and the troops returning from Italy after WW2 had developed a taste for the Italian pie and Bobs your uncle a pizza boom was born.
Several years ago I was trapped (alone unfortunately) in a motel room because of an 8 foot snowfall in Denver.
Nothing to do but watch basic cable.
One channel was nothing but food, history of food and food facts.
I was amazed to learn that what can be called pizza in Italy is tightly controlled by law. From each individual ingredient in the crust and sauce to how it is cooked.
Very serious about their pizza those Italians.
About 30 years ago a friend went to Italy. The guy loved Italian food.
He was very bummed to find that Italian and Italian-American are worlds apart. :)
WORLDS APART.
Dad came here at 6 and mom’s parents came from Sicily.
Beans, zucchini, eggplant, a LITTLE bit of meat and a little pasta.
NOTHING like Italian American food.
I ate so healthy until I moved out.
I ate Italian when I lived home.
I ate Italian american when I moved out
A got relatives in Sicily and been there a bunch of times and I DID NOT know what about the pizza.
How fascinating.
“Beans, zucchini, eggplant, a LITTLE bit of meat and a little pasta.”
The classic Mediterranean diet is VERY healthy being low carb in nature.
The Mediterranean-American, not so much because saturated fats and carbs.
Growing up on the farm we ate healthy as well. Plenty of home grown vegetables, meat, poultry, eggs, fresh milk and butter. We worked plenty hard enough to work off any extra calories.
Odd trivia about Sicily.
When the allies invaded Sicily during WW2 American soldiers would tell the locals they were sent by Lucky Luciano and the locals would throw their doors open for the troops.
After the war Lucky, serving a 30-50 year sentence, was quietly released from prison and deported to Italy where he was greeted like a long lost son.
One senator wanted to give him a medal!!
He SET UP the explosion knowing the govt would ask for his help in protecting the docks.
He was NO patriot.
Lucky worked for Lucky and no one else. He wanted out of prison and found a way.
Strangely the U boats stopped sinking ships within sight of the harbor when the Luciano deal was made. Odd that. One might think their information source dried up.
Wow. That’s awful.
I loved my uncles who have passed.
And they gave good gifts and were nice guys at the family parties.
But I never doubted what they were capable of and what they did to live so richly.
As for the guys at the pizzeria, laughing about kicking old men down stairs is all you need to know about them
If you eat that meager communion wafer called thin crust pizza you starve. But if you prefer cardboard to ambrosia, there’s no hope for you. Pack a lunch on your journey to hell. I’m ordering Godfather’s.
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