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Experts Warn We Have Only 12 Years Left Until They Change The Timeline On Global Warming Again
babylonbee ^ | Aug 1, 2019 | staff

Posted on 08/03/2019 4:01:12 PM PDT by Baynative

WORLD—Climate experts have solemnly warned that we only have twelve years left until they change the dates on global warming again.

"If we don't take action, then in 12 years we will have to explain why the world hasn't ended and come up with a new number," one UN scientist warned. "This is a very serious threat, and we urge everyone to hand control of the economy to the government immediately before we have no more time left to change the timeline again."

The scientific consensus is that roughly 10-12 years from now, the world will be flooded with new doomsday predictions. This can all be avoided if we overhaul the economy and become socialists, according to non-political, unbiased sciencey type guys.

"Should we not change our ways, our old predictions will melt, dangerously raising the chance of us having to move the goalposts again," said Al Gore. "Do you really want me to write another book, film another movie, and go on another tour in my private jet just because you dingbats couldn't be bothered to alter your lifestyles? I don't think so. Let's all get on board with this 12-year figure, or we'll have to push back the date again."

(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...


TOPICS:
KEYWORDS: 12; climate; experts; fakefakescience; globalwarminghoax; greennewdeal
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To: Baynative

I keep telling my wife “look hon, we’ve only got 12 years left. Let’s remortgage the house and blow the money on ourselves!’’. She won’t go for it. Wimmens!


21 posted on 08/04/2019 1:47:50 AM PDT by jmacusa ("If wisdom is not the Lord, what is wisdom?''.)
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To: Vince Ferrer

Better take the Moon with us. That thing is slipping away from us at about and inch or two every year.


22 posted on 08/04/2019 1:50:04 AM PDT by jmacusa ("If wisdom is not the Lord, what is wisdom?''.)
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To: jmacusa
Better take the Moon with us.

Oh, absolutely. In the outer solar system, we may need it to become our artificial sun.

23 posted on 08/04/2019 1:58:03 AM PDT by Vince Ferrer
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To: Baynative

l8r


24 posted on 08/04/2019 3:07:29 AM PDT by preacher ( Journalism no longer reports news, they use news to shape our society.)
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To: AdmSmith; AnonymousConservative; Arthur Wildfire! March; Berosus; Bockscar; cardinal4; ColdOne; ...
Heh heh... Thanks Baynative.

25 posted on 08/04/2019 1:23:32 PM PDT by SunkenCiv (Imagine an imaginary menagerie manager imagining managing an imaginary menagerie.)
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To: Baynative

What parody?

This is exactly what they’ve been doing.


26 posted on 08/05/2019 7:24:18 AM PDT by lepton ("It is useless to attempt to reason a man out of a thing he was never reasoned into"--Jonathan Swift)
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