Concur.
Posted on 07/01/2019 12:06:35 PM PDT by CondoleezzaProtege
In American culture, we believe that men can never be entirely trusted in the realm of the physical. We collectively suspect that, given the opportunity, men will collapse into the sexual at a moment’s notice. That men don’t know how to physically connect otherwise. That men can’t control themselves. That men are dogs.
There is no corresponding narrative about women.
And where does this leave men? Physically and emotionally isolated. Cut off from the deeply human physical contact that is proven to reduce stress, encourage self esteem and create community. Instead, we walk in the vast crowds of our cities alone in a desert of disconnection. Starving for physical connection.
How often do men actually get the opportunity to express affection through long lasting platonic touch? How often does it happen between men? Or between men and women? Not a hand shake or a hug, but lasting physical contact between two people that is comforting and personal but not sexual. Between persons who are not lovers and never will be. Think, holding hands. Or leaning on each other. Sitting together...And if you are a man, imagine a five minutes of contact with another man. How quickly does that idea raise the ugly specter of homophobia? And why?
I doubt its a question the average Italian man would ever ask himself. But here in America, generations of Puritanical sexual shaming have made it a central question. By putting the fear of the sexual first in all our interactions, we have thrown out the baby with the bathwater, avoiding all contact rather than risk even the hint of unwanted sexual touch.
American culture leaves boys few options. While aggression on the basketball court or bullying in the locker room often results in sporadic moments of human contact, gentleness likely does not...
(Excerpt) Read more at goodmenproject.com ...
Yes, though of course that can be shown in many ways.
....Or Sinatra, running for the train, at the end of Von Ryan’s Express...
now i AM in tears... (openly sobbing)
Great old flick.
One of my favorites. Trevor Howard was excellent as well.
You have it backwards. Family and communal ties create male toughness, self-reliance, and individualism because it creates a reason to endure and solve problems and to sacrifice for others.
Lack of family and communal ties create self-obsessed losers who hold a perpetual grudge against God, the universe and everyone else because they are not the center of the universe.
Self-obsessed losers whine about no one wanting to touch them. Rugged individualists can't keep people away from themselves because people want to be supported by strength.
Concur.
Very good points about Christianity being despised in the beginning because of its emphasis on love, compassion, gentleness, meekness.
The God that Jesus seems to have understood seems different from the God of the OT.
I hope blu never finds her(?)self alone. She’ll have to field dress that deer herself - assuming she could shoot it in the first place.
And then she’d have to deal with all the guilt of those damn ‘blurred lines’.
Well, I f'n thank you for your concern. As it turns out, I AM alone, husband died by his own choice 4 years ago. He was very physically affectionate with our sons, his brothers and a couple of old, great friends.
I'm good with a rifle as long as there's a good scope on it, but I'm way better with my 9mm.I no longer hunt, so I don't have to clean dead animals. I do go to the range, I load my own magazines, I'm never "alone" if you know what I mean.
Tonight I learned how to fix the air conditioning on my car. I chop wood, I lived in my little cabin here for two years without electricity or running water. I had to give up that wild lifestyle when the cancer returned. I still do everything around here except plow my 400 ft driveway...only now I do it by electric lights instead of Aladin lamps. I sold the outhouse, used the money to buy firewood. Put in a well and indoor bathroom, every single day I am so damn grateful for running water.
No guilt here. NO lines to be blurred here. One half of the team checked out, so the other half picked up the slack.
So, you were saying?
And then spend their days and nights posting anonymously about what experts they are on the dance between women and men.
Boom!!!!!!!!!! :^)
El-Perfect-O (that’s Spanglish for “perfect”)....
Well, I’m very glad to know that you aren’t really as narrow-minded regarding ‘defined roles’ and ‘blurring lines’ as your earlier post suggested.
Individuals don’t all fit into those neat boxes, and neither do many good marriages.
Dude? Don’t you know a mic drop when you see one? (Oh, and I use “dude” and “guys” for men and women...don’t get all triggered now)
Yes, I’ve noticed your colorful language.
And I’ve noticed your need to have the last, right word. You go for it, hunny #nohomo
Ok. Last word:
I’ve been wondering if you are really a female.
Sometimes, we encounter crude men on FR. But I’ve never before encountered a crude woman.
Maybe that's why you are the way you are, Jamestown. It comes from living in a precious bubble.
But I know you're just making that up to insult blu. There's no way anybody can get as old as you are without encountering all types, including authentic, honest people.
It's better to be aggressive than passive aggressive. At least its honest.
Right?
I don’t live in a bubble, Baggy. I’ve just found that there are ways and influences that are superior to others. People do better keeping uplifting rather than demoralizing company, and society does better when it cultivates the values of the former over the latter.
And then you post again, to assure us that you don't live in a bubble. Well, I like to know in what geographic area you do live (NOT where you live). I'm thinking the white curtains in your room make you think you're living in the clouds...just sitting up there judging society at large.
To say that I'm insulted that you inferred that I'm a man says more about you than it does me. IN your little world, women must not just pick up and carry on after their men leave. Your women must use feminine wiles to con someone into fixing the air conditioner on your car instead of watching YouTube videos till they figure how to fix their car. They must also have someone install a furnace so they don't have to chop and haul firewood.
All the supposedly "masculine" chores, as you call them, are just a part of life. I'm f'n aghast (oops, there goes that language again!) that you would be so sexist to assume that a woman who does all those manly things isn't feminine. Damn, I musta forgot to tell you...I do most of my work in the summer in my shooting skirt. It's a mini, with enough pockets to carry anything. ANd some days, when life is hard, I put on the red cowboy boots...the ones with the really pointy toes. Think cargo shorts without the seam, much cooler. Oh shoot, I should just make one of my sons leave his family and live with me, so I won't get my hands dirty.
You've shown yourself to be hard, very hard. Sucks to be you.
Well, now you’re talking sort of like a real woman.
But I’m wondering what happened to ‘Each sex has defined roles. It’s best not to blur the lines.’
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