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Who do I call?
5/31/2019
| antidemoncrat
Posted on 05/31/2019 6:41:02 PM PDT by antidemoncrat
While mowing grass the other day I spotted a red plastic straw someone had dropped at the edge of our property. I wasn't sure if I should report the incident to the Environmental Protection Agency or the Department of Defense.
TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: anotherstupidvanity; plasticstraw
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To: bayliving
I was thinking CNN, FDA, and SETI should be called as well!
61
posted on
05/31/2019 10:37:23 PM PDT
by
Freedom56v2
(#KATE'SWALL Build it Now)
To: Deaf Smith
If have you touched or moved that straw, you have contaminated the crime scene and that is obstruction of justice!
62
posted on
05/31/2019 10:51:51 PM PDT
by
erkelly
To: antidemoncrat
This is the last straw.
Call in the HazMat team.
63
posted on
05/31/2019 11:06:38 PM PDT
by
Rocky
To: antidemoncrat
To: HotHunt
You must have a wonderfully festive yard.
65
posted on
06/01/2019 1:26:35 AM PDT
by
Salamander
(Death makes angels of us all, and give us wings where we once had shoulders, smooth as ravens' claws)
To: antidemoncrat
When straws become outlawed they will have to pry mine from my frosty Frappuccino! Resist We Much!
66
posted on
06/01/2019 2:08:22 AM PDT
by
outofsalt
(If history teaches us anything, it's that history rarely teaches anything.)
To: antidemoncrat
I was watching a CNN panel discussion the other day and thought I should call PETA because they were flogging a dead horse.
67
posted on
06/01/2019 2:45:45 AM PDT
by
Hootowl
To: antidemoncrat
68
posted on
06/01/2019 4:08:47 AM PDT
by
trebb
(Don't howl about illegal leeches while not donating to FR - it's hypocritical.)
To: Salamander
I live on a 30-acre farm out of town in the country in Florida. Takes me 3 hours to mow our family cemetery, front, side and back yards and the barnyard. All kinds of things disappear into the sandy soil here over time, including any rubbish I mow over. :-)
69
posted on
06/01/2019 4:34:15 AM PDT
by
HotHunt
(Been there. Done that.)
To: antidemoncrat
It is toxic waste. DO NOT ATTEMPT TO DISPOSE OF IT YOURSELF! Only a highly trained and expensive agent of the government has the specialized equipment needed to remove such a dangerous item.
Go inside and stay inside. If you can safely, call 911 and tell them you have a "Code Green" at your address. They will dispatch a team of Environmental Threat Containment Specialists immediately.
This is NOT a matter for a mere human to handle.
70
posted on
06/01/2019 5:22:44 AM PDT
by
IronJack
To: Liz
71
posted on
06/01/2019 6:43:08 AM PDT
by
BenLurkin
(The above is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire. Or both.)
To: dp0622; SandwicheGuy
Easily the most humorous thread in several months.
72
posted on
06/01/2019 7:53:40 AM PDT
by
Chad N. Freud
(FR is the modern equivalent of the Committees of Correspondence. Let other analogies arise.)
To: Chad N. Freud
Agreed :)
The other lie that all conservatives are boring, walking corpses is shot down again and again here.
73
posted on
06/01/2019 8:42:57 AM PDT
by
dp0622
(The Left should know if Trump is kicked out of office, it is WAR!)
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