Posted on 03/20/2019 10:51:09 AM PDT by rightwingintelligentsia
PITTSBURGH (KDKA) Pennsylvania State Police say they are looking for a woman who defecated herself inside a store, and then spread it over 500 feet of carpet.
Lehigh Valley Live reports the incident happened Sunday at stores in Upper Milford Township Lehigh County, which include the Zionsville Antique Mall and a pizzeria.
Troopers at that Fogelsville barracks say the woman defecated herself, then walked around the store, causing damage to about 500 feet of carpet.
She is described as 6 feet tall with gray shoulder length hair, a blue jacket, and a pink purse.
State troopers say she then left in a red Honda Accord.
(Excerpt) Read more at pittsburgh.cbslocal.com ...
LOL
Uh-oh.
You DO know who the co-star for that show was, don't you?
RULES!
“She is described as 6 feet tall with gray shoulder length hair, a blue jacket, and a pink purse.”
That’s a man, Baby! You don’t mix a blue jacket with a pink purse. Seriously! ;)
“You really find out how disgusting people can be when you work in a store.”
18+ years in Retail, Baby; I’ve seen it all!
(And wish I could forget 99.999% of it! Yeesh!)
Right!
If someone naps this kid, they better bring some large diapers.
That was actually a great theme song.
I still have Rockford Files as my fav.
Wow like an AMX Javelin @ 55.
The Rockford Files theme song
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yg1Cx26-928&t=21s
Yes, its very funkadelic!
A sea captain on an old sailing ship was famous for bravery.
One day, a pirate ship is spotted on the horizon. “Get me my red shirt!” says the Captain.
They bring it, he dons it, and when the pirates try to board he fights furiously. The remaining pirates flee. The men are impressed.
Next day, three pirate ships. “Get me my red shirt!”. A repeat of the same but greater magnitude.
That night they ask, “What’s up w/the shirt? Just a lucky one?”
“No”, he says, “I wear red so that if I am wounded, the men won’t notice so won’t be deterred in their own fighting.”
Now the men think he’s the bravest thing that ever lived.
Next day - TWELVE pirates ships on the horizon.
“Get me my brown shorts!”
I’ll bet you have seen everything! I worked in retail for a much shorter time, and I wish I could forget what some customers did, too. :-(
I’m sure they have security footage of this person.
Where is it?
You don’t really want to see that do doo you?
I had a vision of her dragging her butt
on the carpet for 500 feet. Like a dog
with worms. She should be ordered to move
to San Francisco.
Can’t they get DNA out of the leavings?
“Can’t they get DNA out of the leavings?”
They can. Will they? No.
The police are busy. They will direct their efforts to a combination of the easiest matters to resolve and the most urgent matters to address.
If a murder is involved, or a similar crime, such as kidnapping, counterfeiting, etc. the evidence gathered here might get used. But it would probably not even be used then to convict the criminal, just to identify and locate him, (her, it).
Other than that, justice will not be served unless it turns out to be low hanging fruit.
Six feet tall...?
Tranny.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.