Is there a spell that can write more Harry Potter books that aren't robotic-sounding?
Warner Bros
Posted on 12/13/2017 11:59:58 AM PST by Swordmaker
Quit eating Hermione's family, Ron, and what's with the Hufflepuff House pig?
J.K. Rowling, you're in no danger of being replaced any time soon.
The bright Muggles at Botnik Studios trained predictive keyboards (one for narration, one for dialogue) on all seven Harry Potter books and produced a brand-new chapter about the young wizard. And great sizzling dragon bogies, is it awful.
"Our web keyboard app analyzes text files and offers the most common word sequences as suggestions to the human user, to help them write in the style of the source material," Botnik CEO and co-founder Jamie Brew told CNET. (There's a David Bowie-lyric version too.) "Then a bunch of writers in the Botnik community got together in an online chat room and pitched lines they wrote using the keyboard. Our editorial team cobbled these fragments together into the full chapter we posted today."
We used predictive keyboards trained on all seven books to ghostwrite this spellbinding new Harry Potter chapter https://t.co/UaC6rMlqTy pic.twitter.com/VyxZwMYVVy— Botnik Studios (@botnikstudios) December 12, 2017
Even the book title the bot constructed is hilariously horrible: Would you line up at a Barnes & Noble at midnight to buy a copy of "Harry Potter and the Portrait of What Looked Like a Large Pile of Ash"?
There are plot twists Rowling never imagined. Ron Weasley "immediately began to eat Hermione's family," while wearing something called a "Ron shirt." Hufflepuff House has a pig that pulses like a large bullfrog. Ron "was going to be spiders. He just was." One of Hogwarts' passwords is "BEEF WOMEN." And not to spoil the ending, but Harry falls down a staircase "for the rest of the summer" before issuing an overconfident warning.
"The reaction has been great," Brew told CNET. "I think my favorite response so far is this amazing art by character designer Elsa Chang."
"The pig of Hufflepuff pulsed like a large bullfrog. Dumbledore smiled at it, and placed his hand on its head: 'You are Hagrid now.'"https://t.co/Z4zn1aU5Yc pic.twitter.com/mScsGCWiuy— Elsa Chang (@ElsaSketch) December 12, 2017
Couldn’t be much worse than the real thing..................
“Death to the adjective!” —Ernest Hemingway
Well, it's not as long... that's a decided improvement.
Must not have been a fresh clam.
No better than “The Policeman’s Beard is Half-Constructed” http://www.ubu.com/historical/racter/index.html , computer-generated and published in 1983. (I recited/performed one of its poems in high school art class, much to the bewilderment of fellow students.)
It apparently works for Harlequin Romances, but perhaps that audience is even less discerning.
Warhol could take OTHER graphic designer's work, say the guy who designed the Campbell's Soup can, blow it up, and claim it as his own, because it's, er, Pop Art. . . not stolen from someone else. Another would be the photographer who took a Black and White portrait of Marilyn Monroe. . . Warhol takes that photo, ads different colors and makes a collage of six of them and says that, too, is Pop Art, and sells it for millions. Art critics go Gaga over these "artworks" but I just Gag! Has he ever done anything not derivative of someone else's work?
They used google search complete?
I couldn’t tell the difference.
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