Posted on 03/18/2016 9:06:13 AM PDT by Impala64ssa
heh heh.....can't help themselves, waiting for someone to bail them out.
A very old one, but a goody! Always like to see it!....thanks.
“A very old one, but a goody! Always like to see it!....thanks.”
My other favorite golden oldie.
Full of Hot Air
A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost. She lowered altitude and spotted a man in a boat below. She shouted to him, “Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don’t know where I am.”
The man consulted his portable GPS and replied, “You’re in a hot air balloon approximately 30 feet above a ground elevation of 2,346 feet above sea level. You are 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north latitude and 100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude.”
She rolled her eyes and said, “You must be a Republican.”
“I am,” replied the man. “How did you know?”
“Well,” answered the balloonist, “everything you told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to make of your information, and I’m still lost. Frankly, you’ve not been much help to me.”
The man smiled and responded, “You must be a Democrat.”
“I am,” replied the balloonist. “But how did you know?”
“Well,” said the man, “You don’t know where you are or where you’re going. You’ve risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. You’ve made a promise that you have no idea how to keep, and now you expect ME to solve your problem. You’re in EXACTLY the same position you were in before we met, but somehow, now, it’s MY fault.
:0)....with much gusto
Two democrats, jogging on opposite banks of a river...
One yells to the other “Hey... how do I get on the other side?”
The others yells back “Duh!!! You ARE on the other side!!!”
“The others yells back “Duh!!! You ARE on the other side!!!”
Hahahahaha....
That video is racist and sexist. Somebody should force YouTube to remove it and throw the producer into jail. /s
Police find a young woman’s body in a park. Clearly she was a jogger... no wounds, nothing speaking of foul play, but she’s toast. She was wearing a Hillary T-shirt. The jogger is also wearing a headset and has a portable music player.
Cleary deceased... the police begin to cordon off the area.
Upon investigation, the police discover that the battery had died in the music player... they replace the battery, and over the headset comes a voice “Breathe in.... breathe out... breathe in... breathe out...”
This is actually more descriptive of your average liberal college student today (yeah, I know, Democrat.)
Ohhhhhhhhh...ashamed about how much that made me laugh.
Classic.
Glad to make ya smile!!!
We need a bit more of that around here these days...
“Glad to make ya smile!!! We need a bit more of that around here these days...”
Thanks.
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