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***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS THREAD***

Posted on 12/11/2015 4:52:42 AM PST by Lucky9teen

Who's naughty? Who's nice?

1.This elf who's clearly had too much to drink.

2.This elf who won't hesitate to murder some Barbie dolls.

3.This elf who watched Silence of the Lambs one too many times.

4.This elf who quit gift-making to become a ladies' man.

5.This elf who's feeling a bit devious.

6.This elf who didn't think twice before he put his you know what in a box.

7.This narcissistic elf.

8.This elf who wants to make angels.

9.This elf who has taken the game of tag too far.

10.This elf who has an addiction problem.

11.This elf who's enjoying his white privilege.

12.This elf who likes a good office prank.





TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: christmas; elfontheshelf; santa; silliness
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To: ArGee

141 posted on 12/11/2015 11:39:58 AM PST by ArGee (War can be quick or (relatively) painless, but not both.)
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To: Lucky9teen

Don't send a man to the store!

142 posted on 12/11/2015 11:44:22 AM PST by Baynative (Liberty lost is a high price to pay for the experiment of socialism.)
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To: Baynative

143 posted on 12/11/2015 11:48:56 AM PST by ArGee (War can be quick or (relatively) painless, but not both.)
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To: Chasaway
A TCP packet walks in to a bar and says "I want a beer"

The bartender says, "You want a beer?"

The TCP packet says, "Yes, a beer"


ACK ACK ACK

144 posted on 12/11/2015 1:01:59 PM PST by zeugma (Last time I was sober, man I felt bad. Worst hangover I've ever had.)
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To: AppyPappy
ACK ACK ACK

Damn. you beat me to it.

145 posted on 12/11/2015 1:02:51 PM PST by zeugma (Last time I was sober, man I felt bad. Worst hangover I've ever had.)
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To: zeugma

I’d tell a UDP joke, but I never know if anybody got it.


146 posted on 12/11/2015 1:07:17 PM PST by tacticalogic ("Oh bother!" said Pooh, as he chambered his last round.)
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To: ShadowAce

Good afternoon.

I see a description of my chili in your post...

“I need to wipe my ass with a snow cone!”

Mikey makes some good chili.

5.56mm


147 posted on 12/11/2015 1:21:37 PM PST by M Kehoe
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To: tacticalogic
A neutron walks into a bar, and asks the bartender how much for a drink.

"For you," replies the bartender, "no charge".

148 posted on 12/11/2015 2:10:14 PM PST by zeugma (Last time I was sober, man I felt bad. Worst hangover I've ever had.)
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To: zeugma
The bartender says "We don't server your kind here."

A neutrino walks into a bar.

149 posted on 12/11/2015 2:11:31 PM PST by tacticalogic ("Oh bother!" said Pooh, as he chambered his last round.)
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To: zeugma
A cop pulls Heisenberg over and asks him, "Do you know how fast you were going?"

Heisenberg replies, "No, but I know where I am."

150 posted on 12/11/2015 2:12:05 PM PST by zeugma (Last time I was sober, man I felt bad. Worst hangover I've ever had.)
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To: glennaro
To chemists walk into a bar. The first one says, "I'll have some H2O." The second one says, "I'll have some H2O too." The second one died.
151 posted on 12/11/2015 2:15:29 PM PST by zeugma (Last time I was sober, man I felt bad. Worst hangover I've ever had.)
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Because the cop who pulled Schrodinger thought he was a smartass he decides to search the car. Looking in the trunk, he notices there is a dead cat. He asks Schrodinger, "Did you know you have a dead cat in your trunk?"

Schrodinger replied, "no but I do now!".

152 posted on 12/11/2015 2:18:53 PM PST by zeugma (Last time I was sober, man I felt bad. Worst hangover I've ever had.)
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One last one from me...Hope I get this one right...

Einstein, Newton and Pascale decide to play hide and seek. Einstein is "it", so he closes his eyes and starts counting. Pascale immediately runs off and hides. Newton pulls out a piece of chalk and draws a square on the ground with sides that were each one meter long then stands in the middle of it. Einstein reaches 100, then opens his eyes and exclaims "Newton you didn't even hide. I've found you!".

Newton answers, "No. I'm Newton over one meter squared. You found Pascale."

153 posted on 12/11/2015 2:27:34 PM PST by zeugma (Last time I was sober, man I felt bad. Worst hangover I've ever had.)
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To: zeugma

Hydrogen peroxide (if I remember my organic chemistry from many decades ago) will do that if you injest more than a tiny amount! Cheers!


154 posted on 12/11/2015 2:35:44 PM PST by glennaro
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To: Lucky9teen

155 posted on 12/11/2015 4:24:21 PM PST by clearcarbon
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To: Lucky9teen

LOL.....Hey I love this weekly thread and wish it went on longer.


156 posted on 12/11/2015 5:40:40 PM PST by xp38
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To: Chasaway

A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop.


157 posted on 12/11/2015 5:44:04 PM PST by Dutch Boy
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To: Dutch Boy

“Ya know, beer just goes right through me.”


158 posted on 12/11/2015 5:48:52 PM PST by jjotto ("Ya could look it up!")
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To: jjotto

Cows may come and cows may go, but this bull has gone on too long.
Top 160?


159 posted on 12/11/2015 6:08:31 PM PST by fantail 1952 ( So long, America! It's been great while it lasted.)
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To: xp38
You should try the Undead Thread. It never ends.

Previous thread. ...(abandoned at post 8241)

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-chat/3319126/posts

Latest thread started today was hijacked into an undead thread at post 26

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-chat/3370969/posts

Much silliness abounds on undead threads.

160 posted on 12/11/2015 8:04:04 PM PST by zeugma (Last time I was sober, man I felt bad. Worst hangover I've ever had.)
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