Posted on 12/10/2015 1:17:32 PM PST by ArGee
Raqqa, Syria
Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, the leader of the Islamic State in Iraq and the Levant, also known as ISIS, announced today that he would be disbanding all forces and returning all land to Syria and Iraq. The move was prompted by the ongoing Climate Conference in Paris.
"This is one thing we could not have anticipated," Mr. al-Baghdadi said in prepared remarks. "When we see the world coming together like this on such a dangerous subject as Global Climate Change, we realize that our Caliphate will never survive. It's only a matter of time before Climate Change is no more and the world's attention turns to us. At that point, we will have no chance. For the sake of the men, women, and children who have supported us, I can not continue a doomed campaign."
An emotional al-Baghdadi did not take any questions.
Sources close to al-Baghdadi who spoke on the condition of anonymity told us that it was becoming more and more difficult to recruit new fighters. "Even our existing people are extremely demoralized," one said. "The words of Donald Trump himself can not overcome our dispair."
According to their press release, surrender is total and immediate. Fighters are being paid and sent home by division. Any remaining money will be put into a fund to resettle Christians and Yazidis who have been displaced by the war.
"We thought the world was fragmented," one strategist was overheard saying to himself. "Who knew it could come together like this? This is a stinging rebuke."
So far there has been no comment from Damascus, Baghdad, Moscow, or Washington. One source inside the Kremlin said, "We are waiting to see if there will be any follow-up action. We want to make sure this is real before we decide on our next steps."
Low 80s here. I understand we’re going to the pool this evening. I don’t really want to, so I hope there’s a storm instead!
Ha-ha! I like it!
*tagline*
I went out for a bit and sat with Charlie for a while, but came in after about an hour. So far today, I’ve had three breathing treatments. Needless to say, I won’t be hanging around the computer for too much longer.
It’s 106 right now, with 7%, and SE @ 3 mph. Even if we had a pool here, I think I wouldn’t feel well enough to indulge. Darn it. And I love to swim.
My daughter sent me a text a while ago, saying she and her boyfriend are thinking of moving to Puget Sound sometime in the next year. We were up there for about 15 months when the kids were growing up, and she has some good memories of it.
She’ll be closer to her oldest son, too, so that will be good.
She’ll be closer to Anoreth and Dog, too.
Looks like I have no choice but to go to the pool. It’s going to be chilly when that wind hits.
As I expected, it was cold at the pool.
That sounds about right.
I kind of like it here in the mid south. Y’all can come and join us here, y’heah?
But if we have Global Warming, you might like Wisconsin better!
Good morning! That is one darling kitty!
My daughter is so self-absorbed, she probably wouldn’t want to meet anybody that she didn’t approve of beforehand. She has always been concerned most with her wants, and most of them are for material things. But if she wants to move 250 fairies of different sizes to Puget Sound, along with other accumulated ‘things,” she’s welcome to it. ;o]
Insomnia has officially struck. This is not good. I’ve been up for almost two hours and have already been to Walgreen’s for a prescription for my neck meds.
Now I have to check on the laundry room in about an hour. And I will most likely have to have another breathing treatment between now and then. I had a total of five yesterday.
I don’t think there are any more prescriptions I need and I hope there aren’t because I just ran out of money. Dang! I hate when that happens! LOL!
Aww, tiny little squee!
I heart dat fing.
Good morning! The source says the kitten was left on their doorstep when he was about a month old.
Off to the first swim practice of the morning, hope you ladies have a great day!
I hate it when cat burglars strike.
With a bowl of milk and some pulled pork. At least they tried to feed him. (I deduce that this occurred in the South.)
A month is young for a kitten.
Young for a human, too ... a bowl of milk and a dish of pulled pork wouldn’t be much help there.
I went for a walk after my last post and the laundry room wasn’t opened yet. I went back in about half an hour and it was open, so I hurried home and got my laundry.
The laundry is done. The GOOD news is that I now have a key and will open the place on Mondays and Tuesdays! YAY! Now, when I have insomnia, I can at least go open the place.
I had to take another morphine just now, and will have to go in and made the bed soon. *groan*
And I’m out of jalapeno cheese slices! Ohnoes! It’s pretty good with Town House crackers.
Before I went to do laundry, I checked on my son’s package. It’s going to AR, mind you, but it’s taking a shortcut through Bell Gardens, CA! But it’s Media, so it’s pretty much equivalent to “space available” flying.
Poor little kitteh waif probably didn’t even have the teeth to eat solid foods, yet. At least someone gave him to people instead of throwing it in the garbage.
A long time ago, my friend’s son had a Springer spaniel named Kilo, and every time she had a litter that was ready to be weaned, she would take the pups around the neighborhood and put them on people’s stoops. The dog did this, not my friend! Oddly enough, she never visited the same place twice with a pup! :o]
Good tagline!
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