Posted on 12/10/2015 1:17:32 PM PST by ArGee
Raqqa, Syria
Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, the leader of the Islamic State in Iraq and the Levant, also known as ISIS, announced today that he would be disbanding all forces and returning all land to Syria and Iraq. The move was prompted by the ongoing Climate Conference in Paris.
"This is one thing we could not have anticipated," Mr. al-Baghdadi said in prepared remarks. "When we see the world coming together like this on such a dangerous subject as Global Climate Change, we realize that our Caliphate will never survive. It's only a matter of time before Climate Change is no more and the world's attention turns to us. At that point, we will have no chance. For the sake of the men, women, and children who have supported us, I can not continue a doomed campaign."
An emotional al-Baghdadi did not take any questions.
Sources close to al-Baghdadi who spoke on the condition of anonymity told us that it was becoming more and more difficult to recruit new fighters. "Even our existing people are extremely demoralized," one said. "The words of Donald Trump himself can not overcome our dispair."
According to their press release, surrender is total and immediate. Fighters are being paid and sent home by division. Any remaining money will be put into a fund to resettle Christians and Yazidis who have been displaced by the war.
"We thought the world was fragmented," one strategist was overheard saying to himself. "Who knew it could come together like this? This is a stinging rebuke."
So far there has been no comment from Damascus, Baghdad, Moscow, or Washington. One source inside the Kremlin said, "We are waiting to see if there will be any follow-up action. We want to make sure this is real before we decide on our next steps."
Waiting for the Post Office to open and listening to an interview with Marie Osmond. She has a new album.
Am I ever glad to have read those posts of yours.
The Barnet-Fair Appreciation Society is getting a little oppressive to say the least.
:)
Close, Nully! I just have reading glasses in different strengths because I couldn’t afford the lenses that allowed your eyes to focus. They were $1600 more per eye that my insurance would cover. So I just get the glasses at the Dollar Tree. :o]
Bully is actually quite funny, once he gets to know you! And so I really enjoy his visits!! :o])
I will have to Google “Barnet-Fair Appreciation Society “ when I get home.
By the time the PO opened (late, because they can) 20 new friends were waiting with me.
Marie Osmond lives not too far from here. We were assigned to her chapel for a while, but not her ward, so we never saw her.
And I didn’t even catch that, Nully! I am so sorry!
:hangs head in shame:
The song they played after the interview was just okay, but her voice is fine.
No beach?!?
How about the lake instead?
(I love reading this thread...you all go to WalMart as much as I do...love the banter!)
No beach or lake this year, although my husband and some of the teenagers are going to “Seabase” at the coast. Medical bills are up this year.
You’re welcome any time!
“....20 new friends were waiting with me.”
Excellent Work. :)
And I bet the Weather wasn’t mentioned once. :D
Good Afternoon. :)
Welcome to the other end of the Internet.
Is that Teddy (26) Roosevelt?
Yes. BULLY!
We discussed “government work.”
I’ve made baba ganoush to go with the chicken salad. I guess we’ll have that for lunch tomorrow, because it’s too late for lunch today. I’m going to make the filling for the stuffed peppers before naptime. Then I can bake those later, along with the pork roast, which is marinating in orange juice, cilantro, and jalapenos.
Are you working graveyard shift?
"Am I ever glad to have read those posts of yours."
That top thought comes to us via the ever-more ubiquitous "Less Wrong", or as he is more appropriately and congenially known, Eliezer Yudkowsky. He of the Paperclip Maximizer.
Aside from being entertaining, and leading us to think more logically, he leads the thought investigation into Artificial Intelligence.
For some reason, his name or one of them pops up from various directions in regard to interesting discussions. I like to think that I have a personal connection somewhere in his vicinity, but I have to admit that it is disturbingly tenuous.
At any rate, here is another thought from the direction of Paperclip Maximizers: "The paperclip maximizer illustrates that an entity can be a powerful optimizer—an intelligence—without sharing any of the complex mix of human terminal values, which developed under the particular selection pressures found in our environment of evolutionary adaptation, and that an AGI that is not specifically programmed to be benevolent to humans will be almost as dangerous as if it were designed to be malevolent."
Mr. Less Wrong is a specialist at bringing us discomforting realizations.
Very interesting points.
In other news, I’m blaming Tylenol for the personality issues of Tom the Son:
http://www.cnn.com/2016/05/12/health/study-acetaminophen-dulls-empathy/index.html
That’s why I stick to aspirin. Although I may not have known it at the time.
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